Inkcazo: ukufunda ukungabi nakuzinceda yimeko apho umntu – emva kokuqaphela ukuba izenzo zabo azitshintshi nto – ziyeke ukwenza, naxa ukwenza kuyenzeka kwakhona. Isazi ngengqondo uMartin Seligman ubonise oku ngokulinga ngeminyaka yoo-1960: izilwanyana eziphantsi komothuko ongenakuthintelwa emva koko ziyeke ukubaleka, naxa umnyango wokuphuma uvuliwe. Baye bafunda ukuba akukho nto.
Ukusuka kumava ukuya kwigumbi lokuhlala usapho
Ukutshintshelwa kwimpembelelo, ukungabi nakuzinceda okufundileyo kuchaza imfihlakalo abangayiqondi abo babangqongileyo: “kutheni engahambi?”. Ngenxa yokuba ufundile – engacingi, learned, kunye nenkqubo yakhe ye-nervous – ukuba uqhanqalazo alukhokeleli nantoni na, ukubaleka kukubuyisela kwindawo yokuqala, ukuba ukubuza kwandisa inkungu. Emva kweminyaka ye-microtrauma kunye ne-Izithintelo eziphindwe kabini, umbono olula wokushiya udala ukudinwa okufanayo njengemizamo yangaphambili. Ucango lunokuvulwa ngokubanzi: ukufunda kungaphakathi.
Imisayino emithathu yokufunda ukungakwazi ukuzinceda
- Passivity ebusweni beengxaki, nokuba zincinci kwaye zinyibilika.
- Usizi kunye nokurhoxa: iiprojekthi ezimbalwa, iminqweno ebonakalisiweyo embalwa.
- Ukufunda kancinci: “Andizukwazi ukuyenza kakade” kwanangaphambi kovavanyo.
Iindaba ezimnandi: into efundiweyo ayifundwanga
USeligman kunye noogxa bakhe bafumene iqabane elichanekileyo: amava obuchule. Ngamanye amaxesha kwanele ukuba une uloyiso lokuqala olunamava – umda obanjwe, idinga elihloniphekileyo lodwa, ibhokisi lihanjiswe – ukuba ingqondo iphinde ibhalise ukuba isenzo siluncedo. Yiyo ke ingqiqo yoloyiso lwamakhonkco amancinci:
- Khetha amadabi anokuphumelela kwaye uwaphumelele – hayi umboniso omkhulu wokugqibela.
- Bhala uloyiso ngalunye ngokubhala: ukufunda kufuna ubungqina obuphindaphindiweyo.
- Zivumele inkxaso: i-therapist, iqela, okanye i-uqeqesho olukhethekileyo, ukukhawulezisa ukuphinda kusetyenziswe amandla okwenza.
Oku kuchanekileyo ukwakhiwa kwesicwangciso se- kumanyathelo ama-6 ukushiya i-PN: isinyathelo ngasinye siloyiso sobuchule esilungiselela esilandelayo. I-healing, nayo, yakhiwe ngobungqina obuncinci, obuphindaphindiweyo.
Inkcazelo esuka kwi-Glossary ye-narcissistic pervert.
Want to break free from this hold?
The Complete Narcissism Release (PDF book) and the Musc essential oil guide you step by step – at your own pace, at home.
Want to break free from this hold?
The Complete Narcissism Release (PDF book) and the Musc essential oil guide you step by step – at your own pace, at home.
Want to break free from this hold?
The Complete Narcissism Release (PDF book) and the Musc essential oil guide you step by step – at your own pace, at home.
Want to break free from this hold?
The Complete Narcissism Release (PDF book) and the Musc essential oil guide you step by step – at your own pace, at home.