Uvavanyo lobuntu obuyityhefu : Sonke kuye kwafuneka sijongane nomntu ngaxa lithile singayiqondi loo nto. Umntu onetyhefu isenokuba sithi. Oku kwenza ukuba kubalulekile ukuzihlola ukuze ubone ukuba unetyhefu okanye awukho.
Iimpawu ezili-10 zokubona ubuntu obunetyhefu – Uvavanyo
Fumanisa iimpawu ezili-10 zobuntu obuyityhefu ngovavanyo lwethu olulodwa! Funda ukubona ezi ndlela zokuziphatha ziyingozi ezinokutyhefa ubomi bakho:
- Ukukhohlisa rhoqo
- Ukungabi naluvelwano
- Utyekelo lokwenza izinto zibonakale zinzima kakhulu
- Imfuneko yolawulo olugqithisileyo
- Umona ogqithisileyo
- Ukungakwazi ukucela uxolo,
- Ukuhlala uzibeka kwindawo yexhoba
- Ukugxekwa rhoqo
- I-egocentrism egqithisileyo
- Ukungazinzi ngokweemvakalelo.
Olu vavanyo luya kukunceda uchonge ezi mpawu kwabanye, kodwa kwakhona ukubonakalisa ukuziphatha kwakho. Ngemizekelo yokwenyani kunye nemibuzo ekujoliswe kuyo, uya kuxhotyiswa ngcono ukuba ukhusele impilo-ntle yakho ngokweemvakalelo kwaye uhlakulele ubudlelwane obunempilo. Yeka ukuvumela ubuntu obuyityhefu buphembelele kakubi ubomi bakho- thatha ulawulo ngoku ngokuthatha olu vavanyo luvula amehlo!
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Kutheni umntu eyityhefu?
Umntu uba yityhefu ngenxa yendibaniselwano entsonkothileyo yezinto ezingokwengqondo, ezeemvakalelo nezendalo. Rhoqo, ezi ndlela zokuziphatha zinetyhefu zinemvelaphi yazo kumothuko ongasonjululwanga, ukuzijongela phantsi, okanye iipateni zobudlelwane ezingasebenzi kakuhle ezifundwe ebuntwaneni.
Ukungakhuseleki okunzulu kunye noloyiko lokulahlwa kunokunyanzela abanye abantu ukuba basebenzise iindlela zokulawula kunye neqhinga lokuzikhusela. Iziphazamiso zobuntu ezingafunyaniswanga okanye ezinganyangwanga, ezifana ne-pathological narcissism, zinokubangela ukuziphatha okuyityhefu.
Kwezinye iimeko, aba bantu ngokwabo babe ngamaxhoba obudlelwane obuyityhefu kwaye ngokungazi bavelise ezi patheni. Ukuxinezeleka okungapheliyo, ukungakwazi ukulawula iimvakalelo ngendlela ephilileyo, kunye nokungabikho kwezakhono zokunxibelelana kunokunyusa olu tyekelo. Kubalulekile ukuba uqaphele ukuba ubutyhefu abunakuphepheka kwaye ngoncedo kunye namandla, ezi ziphatha zingatshintshwa.
Ngaba ndingumntu onetyhefu?
Ukuzibuza ukuba ungumntu onetyhefu sele luphawu lokuzihlola kakuhle. Ukuvavanya indlela oziphethe ngayo, jonga ngononophelo unxibelelwano lwakho kunye neempembelelo zabo kwabanye. Unokuba yityhefu ukuba uhlala ukhohlisa abantu, unengxaki yokwamkela uxanduva ngezenzo zakho, okanye uhlala ugxeka abanye.
Eminye imiqondiso ibandakanya imfuneko egqithisileyo yolawulo, utyekelo lokulinganisa iimeko, umona oqatha, okanye ukungakwazi ukuhlonipha imida yabanye abantu. Cinga ngendlela ohlangabezana ngayo neemvakalelo zakho, ngakumbi umsindo nonxunguphalo. Ukuba ubudlelwane bakho buhlala bunesiphithiphithi okanye abantu babonakala bekhukuliseka kuwe, oku kungaxela.
Nangona kunjalo, ukuqaphela ezi ndlela zokuziphatha linyathelo lokuqala lokutshintsha. Ukuba unenkxalabo malunga nokuba netyhefu, cinga ngokubona ingcali yezempilo yengqondo ukuze ufumane uvavanyo olunenjongo kunye nezixhobo zokuphucula ubudlelwane bakho.
Koluphi uhlobo lobudlelwane esinokubona ubuntu obuyityhefu?
Ubuntu obunobuthi bunokonakalisa kwiintlobo ezahlukeneyo zobudlelwane. Nangona kunjalo, kukho iimeko ezimbini ezineempembelelo ezimbi kumntu ngamnye.
1. Ubuhlobo obunobuthi: luluphi uvavanyo lobuntu ekufuneka luthathe?
Ukuchonga ubuhlobo obuyityhefu, uvavanyo lobuntu ekujoliswe kulo lunokutyhila. “Uvavanyo loHlolo loBuhlobo” lusebenza ngokukodwa ekuhloleni umgangatho kunye nempilo yobuhlobo bakho. Olu vavanyo luphonononga imiba ephambili efana nokubuyelana, ukuhloniphana, unxibelelwano, kunye nenkxaso yeemvakalelo. Ikunceda ukuba uqaphele imiqondiso yentshukumo engafanelekanga, efana nokukhohlisa, ukungabi naluvelwano, okanye ukungalingani kwamandla.
I-Toxic Relationship Quiz yenye inketho efanelekileyo, egxile ekuchongeni ukuziphatha okuyingozi kwintsebenziswano yakho. Kuba uhlalutyo olunzulu ngakumbi ukuziphatha kwakho, i Emotional Intelligence Test inokukunceda uvavanye ukukwazi kwakho ukulawula iimvakalelo zakho kwaye uqonde ezo zabanye kubuhlobo bakho. Nceda ukhumbule ukuba ezi mvavanyo zizixhobo zokuzihlaziya kwaye azithathi indawo yeengcebiso zobungcali. Nangona kunjalo, banokukunika ukuqonda okuxabisekileyo ekuphuculeni ubudlelwane bakho kunye nempilo yeemvakalelo.
2. Isibini esikubudlelwane obuyityhefu
Isibini esibanjwe kubudlelwane obuyityhefu sihlala sizifumana sivalelwe kumjikelo owonakalisayo wonxibelelwano olubi. Olu tshintsho lungenampilo lunokuzibonakalisa ngongquzulwano olungapheliyo, ukungabikho kwentlonipho, ukuxhaphaza ngokweemvakalelo, okanye ukuxhaphaza ngamazwi okanye ngokwasemzimbeni. Omnye okanye omabini amaqabane angabonakalisa ukulawula, umona, okanye ukuziphatha.
Unxibelelwano ngokuqhelekileyo alunamali, lusoloko lugculelwa yaye luncinane ukuphulaphula. Iimfuno zomntu ngamnye zihlala zingahoywa ngokukhetha ukuxhomekeka okungekho mpilweni. Ukungazithembi kwamaqabane ngokuthe ngcembe kuya kuncipha, yaye kunokuvela iimvakalelo zokungabi nakuzinceda. Phezu kwako nje ukubandezeleka okucacileyo, isibini sisenokukufumanisa kunzima ukwahlukana, singene kumjikelezo woqhekeko nokuxolelana.
Le meko ayichaphazeli nje impilo-ntle ngokwasemoyeni nasengqondweni yamaqabane, kodwa inokuba neziphumo ezichaphazela abo babangqongileyo, ngakumbi abantwana ukuba bakhona. Ukuqaphela ezi mpawu kubalulekile ukuze ukwazi ukufuna uncedo kunye nokuphelisa lo mjikelo unetyhefu.
Ngaba i-narcissistic manipulator inobuntu obuyityhefu?
I-narcissistic manipulator yeyona nto i-archetype yobuntu obuyityhefu. Iindlela zakhe zokuziphatha ziwela nzulu kwi-spectrum ye-toxicity yobudlelwane, ngokuphindaphindiweyo kwinqanaba eligqithisileyo. Ibonakaliswa yi-pathological egocentrism, ukungabikho kovelwano, kunye nesidingo esiqhubekayo solawulo kunye nokuqinisekiswa, i-narcissistic manipulator idala imeko eyingozi ngokweemvakalelo kwabo bamngqongileyo.
Uyabakhohlisa, ubajongele phantsi, aze abaxhaphaze abanye ukuze anelise iintswelo zakhe, engawukhathalelanga umonakalo owenziweyo. Utyekelo lwakhe lokuqikelela, gaslighting, kunye nokutshintshana phakathi kokucinga kunye nokuhla kwexabiso labo basondeleyo kuye zonke zizibonakaliso zobutyhefu bakhe. I-manipulative narcissist ngokuqhelekileyo akavumi ukuvuma iimpazamo zakhe, ngokucwangcisiweyo ebeka ityala kwabanye ngeengxaki zakhe.
Oku kudityaniswa kweempawu kwenza ubudlelwane bakhe bube yingozi ngakumbi. Ngokufuthi zishiya amaxhoba ayo ekwimo yokudideka ngokweemvakalelo nokudinwa ngokwasengqondweni. Ngamafutshane, i-narcissistic perversion imele uhlobo olubukhali kunye nolonakalisayo lobuntu obuyityhefu.
Olunye uvavanyo lweNarcissistic Manipulator
Ngaba ufuna uncedo lokuphumelela?
Akuyomfuneko ukuba ujamelane nolu vavanyo uwedwa. I-Cristina ikuxhasa ngamanyathelo abambekayo kunye nesicwangciso sesenzo somntu. Iseshini yoqeqesho lwevidiyo yomntu ngamnye (iSkype okanye iWhatsApp) — €100 ngeseshoni nganye.
Want to break free from this hold?
The Complete Narcissism Release (PDF book) and the Musc essential oil guide you step by step – at your own pace, at home.
Want to break free from this hold?
The Complete Narcissism Release (PDF book) and the Musc essential oil guide you step by step – at your own pace, at home.
Want to break free from this hold?
The Complete Narcissism Release (PDF book) and the Musc essential oil guide you step by step – at your own pace, at home.
Want to break free from this hold?
The Complete Narcissism Release (PDF book) and the Musc essential oil guide you step by step – at your own pace, at home.