Iindlela ezi-9 zokuziphatha ze-manipulator emva kokwahlukana

Ukuziphatha kwe-manipulator emva kokuphuka : lo mntu uyityhefu wenza njani xa ubashiya? Ngaba izinto ziya zisiba nzima? Iimpendulo zinokwahluka! Ukukunika umbono, nantsi i-9 impendulo enokwenzeka ye-manipulator xa umyeka.

Ukuziphatha kwe-manipulator emva kokuphuka – ukuphendulwa kwe-9

Nantsi eminye imizekelo:

1. Ulijonga kakhulu ixhoba lakhe

Enye yezinto ezingama-20 a i-narcissistic manipulator inzondo kukuyishiya ungayihoyi. Into yokuqala aya kuyenza emva kokwahlukana kukugcina iliso kuwe. Kanye njengokuba irhamncwa lixhakamfula ixhoba lalo, liya kukulandela kwaye lijonge ukuba unxulumana nabani na.

2. Uziva edanile

Le ndlela yokusabela ngokuyintloko ibonisa ukuba akakwazi kukulawula, kungekhona ngenxa yokuba ephulukene nomntu amthandayo. Kwakhona ukuphoxeka kubangelwa kukuba ebengayi kuphumelela ekufikeleleni usukelo lwakhe, olokukwenza uxhomekeke kuye ngokupheleleyo. Eli nqanaba lokuthula le-narcissistic manipulator emva kokwahlukana liphawulwa ngumsindo omkhulu ngakuye kunye nakuwe.

3. Akanaluvelwano

Pha ukusabela kwe-manipulator xa umshiya yiyo nantoni na ngaphandle kwesithandwa okanye umntu onemfesane ngabanye. Ayikho indlela anokuqonda ngayo intlungu okanye ukubandezeleka kwakho, singasathethi ke ngokuba novelwano. Yiyo loo nto enye yeendlela zokuziphatha zomqhekezi emva kokwahlukana kukuba uya kuzama ukwenza ukuba ukholelwe ukuba uyachatshazelwa kukuhamba kwakho. Ngokwenyani, i-manipulative narcissist ibonakala inomtsalane kwaye inenkathalo ekuqaleni kobudlelwane ngelinge lokukulawula.

4. Uyingcaphephe kuMdlalo oMbini

Ngelixa ucinga ukuba i-narcissistic manipulator iyahlupheka, i-manipulator kwelinye icala icinga ukukucenga kwakhona. Uyi-ace kumdlalo ophindwe kabini, indoda enobuso obubini egqwesileyo kule ndawo. Enyanisweni, i-manipulator ye-narcissistic ayinandaba nabanye, ngokuchaseneyo, uyabasebenzisa. Ngoko ke kusenokwenzeka ukuba uya kukwenza ukholelwe ukuba owona mnqweno wakhe mkhulu kukukwenza wonwabe.

5. Uya kujongana nawe ngemilinganiselo yakho

Ukuba ngumkhohlisi omkhulu, injongo yakhe kukukwenza ukholelwe ukuba awunto yanto kwaye uhlengahlengise ixabiso lakho. Kuya kudala ukuziva uphantsi okuya kukhokelela ekuphulukaneni nokuzithemba. Ukujongana neenqobo zakho kumnika ithuba lokophula ikratshi lakho.

6 Ubeka ityala kuwe

Ukufuna ukuguqula imeko ibe yinzuzo yomntu yindlela eqhelekileyo yokusabela phakathi kwabenzi bobuqhetseba be-narcissistic. Ekugqibeleni, uya kuzama ukwenza ukuba uzive unetyala, akugwebe, ahlambele umfanekiso wakhe kwaye azibonakalise njengexhoba. Ngaphezu kwakho konke, musa ukusabela kule mania ngokwenza izinto, kuba isiphumo cwaka kwi-manipulator ayithinteki.

7. Ufuna ukoyikisa ixhoba

Uloyiko luvakalelo olunika amandla amaninzi kwii-manipulators kwaye bayayazi. Yiyo loo nto, ukuba bayasilela ukufezekisa injongo yabo, baya kuzama ukukoyikisa. Indlela yokuba bakubonise ukuba ngabo kuphela abanokukhusela. Qaphela kwaye ngaphezu kwakho konke sebenzisa isibindi ukujongana nabo.

8. Uya kubhenela kubundlobongela ngokwasengqondweni

Emva koloyiko, uya kusebenzisa izoyikiso kwaye ukuba ithuba liziveza, unokude akwenze ukuba udideke. Ngokwenene, ubundlobongela ngokwasengqondweni bubonakalisa enye yempatho-gadalala oya kubandezeleka ngayo kubudlelwane bothando nomntu onama-narcissistic. Kungenxa yoko le nto kufuneka uhlale unenkxaso yengqondo-ngokweemvakalelo ecaleni kwakho emva kokwaphuka ne-narcissistic manipulator.

9. Ukuziphatha kwe-Manipulator emva kokuhlukana: Ufuna ukuxoxisana

I-narcissistic manipulator ihlala ibuyela ebomini bexhoba layo emva kokwahlukana ukuzama ukumenza ukuba anikezele kwisigqibo sakhe. Uya kuzama ukufumana ulungelelwaniso loxolelwaniso olunokwenzeka. Akunakwenzeka ukwazi ngokuthe ngqo ukuba kuya kuthatha ixesha elingakanani ukuba i-narcissistic manipulator ibuye, kodwa uya kuhlala ezibonakalisa ekugqibeleni.

Zeziphi iindlela zobuchule bokukhohlisa?

Ukuseka amandla akhe okukhohlisa, i-narcissistic manipulator yenza ngobuqili ukufihla amehlo exhoba lakhe:

1. Mental projection: apha, umkhohlisi uya kukwenza ubukeke njengebhokhwe yokucalula aze akusole ngokwenza izinto azenzayo ngokwakhe. Njengomntu olixoki oya kuthi ulixoki, okanye umntu onobukhwele, oya kukutyhola ngokuba nomona, nobutyebi;
2. Deformation: ikwabizwa ngokuba sisicwangciso somntu womququ, umkhohlisi ufumana uyolo olukhulu nokuba kukugqwetha amagama akho okanye ukuwenza mandundu. Uyabaguqula nangayiphi na indlela emfaneleyo kwaye usebenzisa iingxoxo zakho ngokuchasene nawe ukusa kwinqanaba lokuba uzive unetyala.
3. Emotional blackmail: obu buchule buyaziwa kwi-manipulator ye-narcissistic kwaye busebenzisa xa kuziwa ekugcineni ixhoba lakhe phantsi kwempembelelo yakhe. Ukuba uyaqaphela ukuba uxhomekeke kuye, awuyi kuqonda xa umntu okhohlisayo ekushiya kwaye ebuya, kuba le yinxalenye yesicwangciso sakhe sokuziphatha kakubi.
4. I-Bluff okanye i-lie: ukufihla inyaniso, ukufihla ngamabomu iingcamango zakhe kuwe, i-manipulator iya kwenza ukuba ubone icala lakhe eliphosakeleyo ngokupheleleyo. Uyi-ace kumdlalo ophindwe kabini.
5. Abuse okanye gaslighting: i-manipulator ikwenza uzithandabuze ukusa kwinqanaba lokuba ubonakale uphambene. Uya kusebenzisa amagama afana nala “Ayikho indlela eyenzeka ngayo! Yintelekelelo yakho! Uyaphambana!” Sihlala sithetha ngokuqweqwediswa kwabantu ngengqondo.

Ngaba ii-manipulators zingatshintsha?

I-narcissistic manipulator ngumntu ongazange azibuze. Ke, ukuzitshintsha kuba ngumsebenzi ophantse ungenzeki, nokuba ngaba iimpawu ezithile zinokuphucuka. Ukwenza oku, kufuneka ukwazi ngokuthe ngqo ukuba yintoni indawo ebuthathaka ye-manipulator?

Inene, ukuze i-manipulator ye-narcissistic itshintshe, kufuneka idlule kwimeko egqithileyo apho iya kubona ukuba ubethe ngenene ilitye ukuya kwinqanaba lokuwa. Oku kufanele kumenze ayiqonde ihambo yakhe aze afune ukutshintsha ngokupheleleyo ukuze abe ngumntu omtsha. Oku kuhlala kunzima ukumisela kunye nokufezekisa, kuba lo ngumntu ovuyayo xa ebona abanye bebandezeleka.

Ireferensi yebhayibhilografi malunga nokuziphatha kobuqhetseba

Nazi iireferensi ezisixhenxe zebhayibhilografi kumxholo wokuziphatha ngokukhohlisa:

1. Sénécal, J. (2013). La manipulation : Comprendre et reconnaître les comportements manipulateurs. Éditions de l’Homme.
2. Vermot, J. (2015). La manipulation émotionnelle. Presses Universitaires de France.
3. Lalande, J. (2016). Le guide de la manipulation : Comment détecter et se défendre contre les manipulateurs. Éditions Eyrolles.
4. Bourcier, S. (2014). Psychologie de la manipulation : Comprendre pour agir. Éditions L’Harmattan.
5. Bouchard, G. (2018). La manipulation sociale : Entre influence et abus. Éditions De Boeck.
6. Cohen, M. (2017). Les manipulateurs : Comment les reconnaître et s’en libérer. Éditions Larousse.
7. Rico, C. (2019). La psychologie de la manipulation : Analyse et perspectives. Éditions Dunod.

Ezi zalathiso zibonelela ngeembono ezahlukeneyo ngesihloko kwaye zinokukunceda ukuba uqonde ngcono ukuziphatha okukhohlisayo kunye neziphumo zako.

Ukuziphatha kwe-manipulator emva kokuphuka – Isiphelo

Ngamafutshane, olu lwazi luya kukuvumela ukuba ube nentloko ekuziphatheni kwe-manipulator emva kokuphuka. Nokuba ngamanye amaxesha kunokuba luncedo ukwazi ukuba i-manipulator ikushiya njani, kodwa ukuba inyathelo livela kuwe, yazi ukuba umthuthumbisi wakho akayi kukuyeka.