Indlela yokuphatha i-manipulator? Iingcebiso zokuyiphikisa

Ukuphila nomntu okhohlisayo kulucelomngeni lokwenene. Ngaso sonke isigqibo esiza kwenziwa, kunye noluvo ngalunye oluza kunikelwa, uya kuhlala enelizwi lakhe yaye uya kusoloko efuna ukuba abo bamngqongileyo benze izinto ngendlela athanda ngayo. Kodwa xa unokubona imigibe yomntu okhohlisayo, unokumenza ayenze ngobulumko. Ukuba ufuna ukufumana isandla esiphezulu kuye, Nazi ezinye iindlela ezisebenzayo indlela yokuphatha i-narcissistic manipulator.

Iingcebiso ezi-8 zokuphatha i-manipulator

Akusoloko kulula ukujongana neenyani kwaye uzikhulule kwiimpembelelo zomntu ongenangqondo. Ukukunceda, Nazi iindlela ezisi-8 zoku lawula indoda enenkohliso :

1. Ungayihoyi i-manipulator

Elinye lamaqhinga alula okumelana ne-manipulator kukwenza ngokululaungahoyi. Ngokwenene, okukhona uphelelwa ngumdla kuye, kokukhona uya kuziva ngathi uphelelwa ngamandla. Uyakuthiya ukungabi ngumbindi wehlabathi kwaye ke ngoko uya kuphazamiseka ukuba awumhoyi. L’ukungakhathali kunokuba luncedo kakhulu ukuzikhulula kwi-manipulator, ngakumbi xa ezama ukubeka imigibe ebomini bakho. Okukhona ufunda ukwenza ungayihoyi i-narcissistic manipulator, kokukhona uya kuba nako ukumelana nayo kwaye uzikhulule ngokupheleleyo ekubambeni kwayo.

2. Yigqithise kwingxoxo kwaye uphephe umgibe

I-manipulator yinkosi yobugcisa be ukulawula abo bakungqongileyo kunye nokukhokela isigqibo sabo sokuguqula yonke into ibe yinzuzo kubo. Udla ngokuqala ngokubeka phambili umbandela aze anike uluvo lwakhe ngale meko okanye kuloo meko. Emva koko, uyaphumelela ekuqinisekiseni umthetheleli wakhe ukuze avumelane nombono wakhe. Eyona ndlela ilungileyo yokuphepha ukuwela kumgibe wakhe kukuphepha ingxubusho. Ukuba uyambona eqalisa umdlalo wakhe omncinane, wuphephe loo mbandela uze uthethe ngenye into ngokukhawuleza ukuze umbambe angalindelanga.

3. Nika impendulo yakho kwaye ungazicacisi okanye uzithethelela

Ngamanye amaxesha i-manipulator ikubuza nje umbuzo othandabuzayo kuwe ukwenza umntu azive enetyala kwaye uthathe ulawulo phezu kwakho. Xa usazi ukuba lo ngumbuzo oya kukhokelela komnye kunye nengxoxo enokuthi ikubambise, isisombululo esona sisombululo sokuzikhusela kuku vele unike impendulo elula kwaye ungazithetheleli. Xa egxininisa ukuva uluvo lwakho, unokuphendula nje ngeengxelo ezilula ezifana: “Ngumbono wam nje lowo!” okanye “ukuba utsho…”.

4. Awusakwamkeli ukuqhathwa

Mhla uvuma ukuba awusayi kuba lixhoba le umlahli weemvakalelo, akusayi kuphinda kubekho ukukhohlisa. Oku kumalunga nokwenza isigqibo sokuzikhulula kwimpembelelo yayo. Xa uyeka ukunikezela, kulapho inkululeko yakho iqala khona. Zenzele izigqibo ungasekelwanga kwabanye. Kukwamalunga nokuba ungazivumeli ukuba uphenjelelwe ziimbono zakho, amazwi akho ahlabayo kunye nezinyeliso zakho.

5. Sebenzisa ubuchule benkungu (hlala ungacacanga, sukubeka uluvo lwakho)

Oku malunga ungabonisi ngokupheleleyo uluvo lwakho kumbuzo okanye kwisihloko. Vumela amathandabuzo ahlale embuzweni ukuze angayiboni inyaniso kwaye ke akulahlekise ngokufanelekileyo. Xa lowo ulawulayo engaqinisekanga ngesiqu sakhe, uya kuba nobunzima ekuphembeleleni ixhoba lakhe. Unokuphendula kwakhona ngemibuzo yomxholo. Umzekelo, xa ebuza uluvo lwakho ngento ethi “uSara ngumfazi ogcinwe kakhulu”, unokuphendula ngokuthi “ugcinwe kakhulu?” kwaye ulandele “mhlawumbi” okanye “ukuba utsho” okanye “andinaluvo ngalo mbandela”.

6. Mthathe kumdlalo wakhe

Udlala njani nge-manipulator? Kulungile, kufuneka dlala owakho umdlalo. Obu buchule bubandakanya ukubuza ngezenzo ze-manipulator. Ingongoma apha kukujongana naye kwaye sikhanyisele iinjongo kunye neentshukumisa zakhe. Umzekelo, xa ezama ukukukhohlisa okanye ukwenza uzive unetyala, mbuze imibuzo efana nale “Uthetha ukuthini ngaloo nto?” okanye “Uthetha ukuthini?”. Umntu okhohlisayo uya kuhlala erhoxa kuba ebona ukuba usemngciphekweni wokutyhilwa. Ngale ndlela uya kwazi ukuba uwuthathile umdlalo wabo kwaye uphumelele umdlalo.

7. Menze alinde

Ngamanye amaxesha elona qhinga lokuchasa ukukhohlisa kuku yenza umqhubi alinder. Kwiimeko ezithile, kuyenzeka ukuba afune isenzo okanye impendulo kuwe ukuba unobunzima bokubala. Kwezi meko, ukumenza alinde sesona sisombululo. Imalunga nokuphepha iimfuno ezingapheliyo ze-manipulator yakho kunye namaqhinga okunikezela.

8. Ukungamniki ulawulo

Ukuze ube namandla kune-manipulator, akufuneki ungaze umnike ulawulo. Ngokwenene, kanye njenge-manipulator ye-narcissistic, i i-narcissistic manipulator kufuneka ukulawula yonke into. Ukuba uhlala uqinile kwaye ungamniki ithuba lokukubopha, akayi kukwazi ukudlala indima yakhe kwaye uya kulahlekelwa ngumdla kwixhoba lakhe. Kukwamalunga nokubeka imida yakho kwaye ukwazi ukuthi hayi ngaphandle kokuthandabuza okanye ukoyika.

Yintoni inqaku elibuthathaka le-manipulator?

I-manipulator kufuneka ilawule abo bamngqongileyo kunye nendawo ahlala kuyo, kuba uziva uloyiko, ukungabikho kokuzithemba kunye nokuxhalaba. Kukuziphatha kakubi okumtyayo ngaphakathi kwaye kumenza afune ukwenza abo bamngqongileyo babandezeleke ukuze azive kamnandi. THE indawo ebuthathaka ye-manipulator uhlala kule nto amandla olawulo. Eneneni, ekubeni kufuneka alawule yonk’ into, uya kuphelelwa ngamandla xa abanye bengayithobeli iminqweno yakhe.

Ukuba ufuna ukuphumelela ekuzikhululeni kwi-manipulator, menze aqonde ukuba awuselilo ixhoba lakhe kwaye akasenawo amandla okukukhohlisa. Uya kwandula ke azi ukuba uye wasongamela kuye yaye akusayi kuphinda uyivumele le nto ukuba yenzeke. Kwaye ukulahlekelwa kolawulo yenye ye izizathu ezoyikisa i-narcissistic manipulator ndikubudlelwane. Ukuqonda kunokuba nzima, kodwa emva kokuba eli nyathelo lithathiwe, ukwakhiwa kwakhona kuya kwenzeka ngokwakho.

Isilumkiso: Ngaba ngokwenene uyafuna ukukhohlisa?

Nokuba ufuna ukwazi indlela yokugoba i-manipulator, cinga ngaphezu kwayo yonke into yokuba ukukhohlisa i-manipulator kuya kukukhokelela ekubeni wenze njengaye. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba awuyithandi into eyenziwa ngumqhatha kuwe, kutheni ufuna ukumkopa kwaye uwele kumdlalo wakhe? Ukuba le ngcamango iyakoyikisa, yazi ukuba kulula ukubeka izinto kunye nokucacisa izinto.

Kwakhona, ukwenza izigqibo ezifanelekileyo kuxhomekeke kwityala lakho. Kwakhona khumbula ukuba iindlela ozisebenzisayo apha azenzelwanga ukumenza abandezeleke, kodwa nje ukuthintela amaqhinga akhe. Ayingombuzo wokumkhokela ngempumlo, kodwa kukuphikisana nezenzo zakhe.

Ukuba ufuna uncedo lokuphiliswa emva kokuphathwa kakubi ngokweemvakalelo kwixesha lakho elidlulileyo okanye ngexesha lobomi bakho obudala, yazi ukuba ungalufumana uncedo kugqirha okanye kwisayikholojisti eyingcali ebaleni. Ukuxhaswa ngumntu oqeqeshiweyo kuya kuba luncedo kakhulu ukuba uzakhe kwakhona kwaye uphinde ukuzithemba.