Izinto ezili-12 ezithiywa yi-narcissistic manipulator: Isikhokelo

Nxibelelana no i-narcissistic manipulator ngamava okulinga, aphawulwa kukufuna kwawo rhoqo ukulawulwa nokungayikhathaleli imiphumo kwabanye. Eli nqaku lityhila ezona zinto zintandathu zithiye kakhulu aba manipulators, ngaloo ndlela benika amaxhoba izitshixo zokuqonda nokoyisa obu budlelwane buyityhefu.

1. Umbhexeshi uyayithiya imida yomntu

Ama-manipulative narcissists anenzondo enzulu kwimida yobuqu. Bahlala bezama ukuzoyisa, kuba le miqobo imele umqobo kulawulo lwabo kunye nokukhohlisa.

Kubudlelwane obunempilo, imida ye- iyahlonitshwa kwaye iyakhuthazwa. Bavumela wonke umntu ukuba agcine ingqibelelo kunye nokuphila kakuhle ngokweemvakalelo. Nangona kunjalo, kwi-manipulator, le mida ibonwa njengesoyikiso esithe ngqo kumandla abo okuba nefuthe.

Xa ubeka imida ecacileyo, unokulindela ukuba i-manipulator isabele ngomsindo okanye ukukhungatheka. Oku kudla ngokuba luphawu oluxelayo lobudlelwane obuxhaphazayo obusenziwayo. Ngokujongela phantsi ukuzithemba kwakho, bafuna ukwaphula ekuphela komqobo othintela ukuba bafikelele ngokupheleleyo kubomi bakho kunye neemvakalelo zakho.

Ukuzikhusela, kubalulekile ukuba:

• Chonga imida yakho yobuqu
• Thetha nabo ngokucacileyo nangokungqongqo
• Hlala ungaguquguquki kwisicelo sabo, nangona kukho ingcinezelo.

2. Uvuyo Lokwenene Lwabanye

AmaNarciss aphazanyiswa kakhulu luvuyo lokwenene lwabanye. Olu lonwabo lokwenene lubakhumbuza oko bangenakuziva ngokwabo, ukudala imvakaleloukwahlukana. Ukongezelela, umntu owonwabileyo ngokwenene akanakufane awele kwimigibe yakhe ekhohlisayo, kuba akaxhomekekanga kubo ukuze baphile kakuhle.

3. Izithintelo kwimpembelelo yayo

Abaqhubi beNarcissistic abaneliseki ekusukeleni kwabo oko bakufunayo. Abayikhathalelanga impilo-ntle yabanye kwaye bakulungele ukwenza umonakalo ukuze bafezekise iinjongo zabo.

Kubalulekile ukumisela izithintelo ezicacileyo kuba ii-manipulators azize zibeke nayiphi na yazo. Baya kuthatha ngonaphakade, bangaze baneliseke. Naxa ubanika yonke into abayicelayo, akwanelanga.

Ukuzikhusela:

• Funda ukuthi hayi
• Zibekele imida ecacileyo ngoko ukulungeleyo ukunikela ngako
• Musa ukunikezela kwityala baya kuzama ukwenza ukuba uzive.

4. Ukulahlekelwa ngumthombo wokutya

Ilahleko “yokutya”. Ligama elisetyenziselwa ukubhekisa kuqwalaselo okanye ukuqinisekiswa abakufumana kwabanye – bathiywa ngama-narcisists. Ngokufana nekhoboka leziyobisi, bahlala befuna umthombo abawuthandayo wokuqinisekiswa kunye nemfuno yokuhoywa. Ukulahlekelwa ngumthombo onjalo, ngakumbi emva kokulawula, kubuhlungu kakhulu kubo.

5. Inkululeko yomntu: utshaba olufungelweyo lwe-narcissistic manipulator

Iinarcissists ezikhohlisayo zinolawulo olugqithisileyo kwaye ziyayicaphukela ingcamango yokuba ungakhululeka kwaye uzimele. Badla ngokwenza ngathi ngabakho, befuna ukulawula izenzo zakho, iingcinga nobudlelwane bakho.

Ukanti inkululeko yobuqu yenye yezona nkalo zibalulekileyo zobomi obanelisayo. Kubandakanya ukuba nguwe ngaphandle kokufuna imvume yomntu. Kubudlelwane obunempilo, iqabane ngalinye kufuneka lizive likhululekile ukuba lilodwa.

Ukugcina inkululeko yakho:

• Bange ukuzimela kwakho
• Gcina izilangazelelo zakho kunye nobudlelwane obungaphandle kobudlelwane kunye ne-manipulator
• Yixhathise imizamo yokulawula ubomi bakho.

6. INyaniso yeHlabathi

Narcissists bayawacaphukela amaxesha abanyanzela ukuba bajongane nenyani yonogumbe wabo. Amava aveza ukuqhawuka kwabo kwinyani, abajongana nenyaniso yokuba abakhethekanga njengoko bakholelwayo, adodobalisa kakhulu. Oku kuqonda kunokubangela ingxaki ye-narcissistic okanye ukuwa ngokupheleleyo kwe-facade yabo.

7. Umbhexeshi we-narcissistic uyaluphepha uxanduva

Ii-Narcissistic manipulators ziyagqwesa ekubekeni ityala kwabanye. Bala ngokucwangcisiweyo ukuthwala uxanduva ngezenzo zabo okanye amazwi abo, bekhetha ukugxeka abo babangqongileyo okanye iimeko.

Olu tyekelo lokuphepha uxanduva lwendele nzulu kubuntu babo. Baziincutshe ekwenzeni uzive unetyala, naxa ingumbandela wokuziphatha kwabo.

Ukujongana nale meko:

• Funda ukuqaphela iindlela zabo zokungabi namandla
• Baphendule ngokuqinileyo ngezenzo zabo
• Musa ukuzivumela uqiniseke ukuba nguwe obekek’ ityala ngeempazamo zabo.

8. Ukudinwa

Enye into ecekisekayo ngabaqhubi be-narcissistic kukujongana neempazamo zabo. Ukuzibona kwabo njengabangenampazamo kubenza basebenze kakhulu xa beboniswa bengachanekanga. Le meko inokukhokelela kumsindo ogqithisileyo kunye nomsindo we-narcissistic kuba icela umngeni kwinyani yabo egqwethekileyo.

9. Ukulahlekelwa kolawulo: yintoni i-manipulator yoyika ngaphezu kwayo yonke into

I-Narcissistic manipulators ngabalawuli ngokugqwesileyo. Bacinga ukuba bazi ngcono kunaye wonke umntu ukuba wonke umntu kufuneka aphile njani ubomi bakhe, ukanti abakwazi ukulawula obabo ngendlela esempilweni.

Xa uqala ukubulawula kwakhona ubomi bakho, badla ngokusabela kakubi. Basenokuzama ukukhohlisa iimbono zabanye abantu ngawe, ngokuzama ukulawula indlela abantu abathetha ngayo nawe okanye abaziphatha ngayo kuwe.

Ukubuyisela ukulawula ubomi bakho:

• Yenza izigqibo ezizimeleyo
• Yixhathise impembelelo yabo kukhetho lwakho lobuqu
• Yomeleza ubudlelwane bakho nabantu obathembileyo nabakuxhasayo.

10. Iitalente Nezakhono Zabanye

AmaNarcisists aziva enomona onzulu wezakhono kunye neetalente zabanye. Abanakumela ukubona umntu ephumelela okanye eqatshelwa ngezakhono zabo, kuba oko kusongela imbonakalo yabo. Basenokuzama ukudimaza okanye ukonakalisa abo babajonga njengezoyikiso kwisimo sabo.

11. Xa umqhathi eluthiyile ukhetho lwakho: ukwala ukuhlangabezana nolindelo lwakhe oluyityhefu

Ama-manipulative narcissists ahlala enolindelo olungekho ngqiqweni nolungekho mpilweni kwabanye. Basebenzisa olu lindelo njengesixhobo esikhohlisayo, sikwenza uzive ungafaneleki okanye ungafanelekanga ngokwaneleyo xa ungahlangani nabo.

Oku kulindelekileyo kuyityhefu kubeka uxinzelelo oluqhubekayo kubudlelwane kwaye kunokuchaphazela ngokunzulu ukuzithemba kwakho. Kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuba olu lindelo lusoloko lungekho ngqiqweni kwaye alunabulungisa.

Ukulawula oku kulindelekileyo ngokugqithisileyo:

• Funda ukwahlula ukulindela okunempilo kwizinto ezilindelweyo eziyityhefu
• Zibekele iinjongo kunye nemigangatho yakho
• Musa ukuvumela isigwebo sabo ukuba sikweyise.

12. Igama elithi “Hayi”

Kubantu abathandanayo, ukuva igama elithi “hayi” kuluvavanyo lokwenene. Ngenxa yombono wabo ogqwethekileyo wenyaniso apho bakholelwa ukuba babalulekile kwaye basembindini wayo yonke into, abakunyamezeli ukwala. Nokuba ngendlela echubekileyo okanye ethe ngqo, i-narcissist iya kubona ukwala njengesisongelo sokuzithemba kwabo kunye nokuhlaselwa kwinkohliso yabo yobungangamsha.

Ukuqukumbela

Ukujongana ne-a i-narcissistic manipulator ngumngeni omkhulu, kodwa ukuqonda oko bakuthiyileyo kunokukunika izixhobo ozidingayo ukuze uzikhusele kwaye uphinde ukwazi ukulawula ubomi bakho. Khumbula ukuba unelungelo lokubeka imida, ugcine inkululeko yakho, kwaye ungahambelani nolindelo olungekho ngqiqweni.

Ukuba uyaziqaphela kwiimeko ezichazwe, unganqikazi ukufuna uncedo kwiingcali okanye amaqela enkxaso. Awuwedwa kolu vavanyo, kwaye kukho izixhobo zokukunceda woyise obu budlelwane buyingozi kwaye wakhe ukuzithemba kwakho.

👇 Ukuya phambili:

• Kutheni umkhohlisi elicaphukela ixhoba lakhe?
• Uba yinarcissistic kunye nobuqhophololo?
• Njani ukungazinzisi i-paranoid narcissist? Isikhokelo kumaxhoba