Intshukumo yokulahlwa: indlela yokukhusela ye-narcissistic manipulator

Kubudlelwane obuyityhefu obubandakanya i-narcissistic manipulator, amaxhoba ahlala ejongana nokuziphatha okudidayo kunye nokwenzakalisayo. Phakathi kwezi ziphatha, “intshukumo yokugatya” ithatha indawo ekhethekileyo. Eli nqaku lijonge ukuphonononga nzulu ingqikelelo yentshukumo yokulahlwa, ukubonakaliswa kwayo, kunye nefuthe layo kwabasetyhini ababanjwe kubudlelwane kunye ne-narcissistic manipulator.

Inkcazo kunye nemvelaphi yesindululo sokugxotha

Isindululo sokwala kukuziphatha apho umbhexeshi we-narcissistic etyhala ixhoba lakhe ngendlela ekhohlakeleyo nangesiquphe, rhoqo ngaphandle kwesizathu. Oku kugatywa kungathatha iindlela ezininzi, ukusuka ekungakhathali okubandayo ukuya kwintiyo evulekileyo. Ukuqonda le nto, kubalulekile ukuvavanya iingcambu zayo zengqondo.

Ukugatywa njengesixhobo sokulawula iimvakalelo kunemvelaphi ekungakhuselekanga okunzulu kwe-narcissistic manipulator. Ayinakukwazi ukulawula ubuhlobo obusondeleyo kunye nokoyika ukulahlwa, i-narcissistic manipulator isebenzisa ukugatywa njengendlela yokukhusela yokukhusela. Ngokugatya enye, ukholelwa ukuba uyakuphepha ukwaliwa naye.

Ukubonakaliswa okubambekayo kwesindululo sokwala

Ukuchaswa okucwangciswe ngumbhexeshi we-narcissistic kunokubonakaliswa ngeendlela ezininzi:

• Ukuthula ixesha elide kunye nokwala ukunxibelelana
• Ukugxekwa rhabaxa kunye nokubeka phantsi okokoko
• Ukuqelelana ngokwasemzimbeni nangokweemvakalelo
• Ukuthelekisa okungafanelekanga nabanye abantu
• Ukuthotywa esidlangalaleni okanye bucala

Ezi ziphatha zijolise ekunciphiseni ixhoba kunye nokudala ukuziva ungakhuselekanga ngokusisigxina kubudlelwane.

Impembelelo yengqondo yesindululo sokugxotha kumaxhoba

Iziphumo zolu hlobo lokuziphatha kwimpilo yengqondo yamaxhoba zinkulu:

• Ukuphulukana nokuzithemba nokuzithemba
• Ukuxhalaba okungapheliyo kunye noxinzelelo lwasemva kokuphazamiseka
• Ukudakumba kunye neengcamango zokuzibulala kwiimeko ezinzima
• Ukubhideka ngokweemvakalelo kunye nengqondo (isibane segesi)
• Ukwahlukaniswa koluntu kunye nokulahleka kweebheringi

Ixhoba lizifumana likwimeko yobuthathaka obukhulu, lifuna rhoqo ukuqonda kunye “nokulungisa” ubudlelwane.

Iindlela ezisisiseko zesindululo sokuchitha

Ukuqonda ngokupheleleyo ukuguquguquka kwesindululo sokwala, kubalulekile ukuphonononga iinkqubo zengqondo ezibambisayo:

1. Umjikelo we-devaluation-devaluation: Isindululo sokukhatywa sihlala siyinxalenye yomjikelo obanzi wokufezekiswa kunye nokuhla koxabiso. I-narcissistic manipulator iyatshintshana phakathi kwamaxesha apho ibeka khona ixhoba layo kwi-pedestal kunye nezigaba zokulahlwa ngenkohlakalo. Lo mzekelo udala ukuxhomekeka ngokweemvakalelo kwixhoba, elisoloko lifuna ukuphinda liphinde lifumane amaxesha okucinga.
2. Uqikelelo lokungakhuseleki komxhasi we-narcissistic: Ukwaliwa kunokubonwa njengentelekelelo yokungakhuseleki komcebisi we-narcissistic. Ngokugatya enye, ubeka ngaphandle uloyiko lwakhe lokulahlwa nokungafaneleki, elwenza luthwale ixhoba lakhe.
3. Isidingo sokulawula kunye namandla: Isiphakamiso sokugatywa sisebenza nokugcina ukungalingani kwamandla kubudlelwane. Ngokugcina iqabane lakhe kwimeko yokungaqiniseki rhoqo, i-narcissistic manipulator iqinisekisa ukuba igcina ulawulo lweemvakalelo kunye nokwenza izigqibo.

Imiba eyothusayo yesindululo sokurhoxiswa

Izinto ezithile zinokuqinisa impembelelo kunye nokuphindaphinda kokuziphatha kokwala:

• Ukwahlukaniswa kwentlalo yexhoba: Okukhona ixhoba likwahlulwa kuthungelwano lwalo lwenkxaso, kokukhona lixhomekeke kumbhexeshi we-narcissistic kwaye libe sesichengeni sokuchaswa kwakhe.
• Umothuko wangaphambili: Abafazi abasele benamava okulahlwa okanye ukulahlwa kwixesha elidlulileyo banokuchaphazeleka ngokunzulu kukukhatywa kwe-manipulator ye-narcissistic.
• Ubude bobudlelwane: Over ixesha, imijikelo yokulahlwa inokuqinisa, ikhulise ngakumbi i-gap yeemvakalelo kunye nengqondo phakathi kwe-manipulator ye-narcissistic kunye nexhoba labo.

Iziphumo zeXesha elide zokuBhenca kwiSindululo sokuChasa

Impembelelo yale ndlela yokuziphatha enetyhefu ayiphelelanga kubude bobudlelwane. Iziphumo zasemva zinokuqhubeka ixesha elide emva kokuba iphelile:

• Ubunzima bobudlelwane bexesha elizayo: Amaxhoba asenokuhlakulela uloyiko lokusondelelana kunye nobunzima bokuthembela kubudlelwane bexesha elizayo.
• Atachment disorders: Ukuvezwa ngokuphindaphindiweyo ukwaliwa kunokuguqula ngokusisigxina iipateni zokuncamathela zexhoba, ziphembelele ubudlelwane babo bexesha elide.
• Iingxaki zempilo yenyama: Uxinzelelo olungapheliyo olubangelwa yintshukumo yokugatywa lunokuba nemiphumo kwimpilo yomzimba, ngakumbi kwiinkqubo zokuzivikela kunye ne-cardiovascular system.

Isindululo sokukhatywa kwimeko yentlalo

Kubalulekile ukubeka le nto kumxholo obanzi:

• I-I-Gender stereotypes kunye nentshukumo yokwala: Imigaqo yentlalontle kunye neengcinga zesini ngamanye amaxesha zinokulungisa iindlela ezithile zokuziphatha zokuchasa, zenze kube nzima ukuchonga kunye nokulwa.
• Impembelelo ebantwaneni: Kwiintsapho apho olu hlobo lokuguquguquka lukhoyo, abantwana banokufaka ngaphakathi iipatheni zobudlelwane obungasebenziyo, ezinokuthi ziqhubekisele phambili umjikelo kubudlelwane babo bexesha elizayo.

Iimbekiselo zeBibliographic kwingqikelelo yokwaliwa

• Baumeister, R. F., & Leary, M. R. (1995). Isidingo sokuba ngowakho: Umnqweno wokuncamathela phakathi kwabantu njengeyona ntshukumisa ingundoqo yomntu. I-Bulletin yeNgqondo, i-117 (3), i-497-529.
• DeWall, C. N., & Bushman, B. J. (2011). Ukwamkelwa kunye nokulahlwa kwezentlalo: Okumnandi kunye nokukrakra. Izikhokelo zangoku kwiSayensi yeNgqondo, i-20 (4), i-256-260.
• MacDonald, G., & Leary, M. R. (2005). Kutheni ukukhethelwa bucala eluntwini kubuhlungu? Ubudlelwane phakathi kwentlungu yentlalo kunye nomzimba. I-Bulletin yeNgqondo, i-131 (2), i-202-223.
• Downey, G., & Feldman, S. I. (1996). Iimpembelelo zokukhatywa kobuntununtunu kubudlelwane obusondeleyo. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 70 (6), 1327-1343.
• Bourgeois, K. S., & Leary, M. R. (2001). Ukumelana nokulahlwa: Ukujongela phantsi abo basikhethayo ekugqibeleni. Ukukhuthazwa kunye novakalelo, i-25 (2), i-101-111.
• Smart Richman, L., & Leary, M. R. (2009). Iimpendulo kucalucalulo, ukubekwa ibala, ukucalulwa, kunye nezinye iindlela zokungafunwa phakathi kwabantu: imodeli enezinto ezininzi. Ukuphononongwa kwengqondo, i-116 (2), i-365-383.

Olu luhlu lubandakanya imiba eyahlukeneyo yokulahlwa, kubandakanywa iziphumo zayo zengqondo kunye ne-neurological, iimpembelelo zayo kubudlelwane phakathi kwabantu, kunye nezicwangciso zokumelana xa ujongene nokulahlwa.

Ukuqukumbela

Ukuqukumbela, isindululo sokugxothwa simele umba ofihlakeleyo nowonakalisayo wobudlelwane nombhexeshi we-narcissistic. Ukuqonda olu matshini linyathelo elibalulekileyo kumaxhoba abasetyhini ezi ndlela zokuziphatha toxic. Ngokuchonga ezi patheni, banokuqala ukuhlengahlengisa ulawulo lwengqondo oluqhutywa yi-narcissistic manipulator kwaye baqale inkqubo yokuphilisa. Kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuba ezi ndlela zokuziphatha azibonakalisi ixabiso lexhoba, kodwa zisisiphumo sokungakhuseleki okunzulu kunye nokungasebenzi kakuhle kwe-narcissistic manipulator ngokwakhe.