Impembelelo yezeNgqondo: Indlela yokuyiqonda?

Impembelelo yengqondo: IPsychology idlala indima ebalulekileyo kwimpumelelo yomntu kunye/okanye yobungcali okanye ukusilela. Nokuba umntu uzifumana ekuyo nayiphi na imeko, kuya kufuneka ajamelane nabantu abadlala ngempembelelo yakhe ngokwasengqondweni. Kule nqaku sikuxelela indlela yokuchonga ukubanjwa kwengqondo kunye nendlela yokuyilahla.

Yintoni i-Psychological Hold?

Ulawulo lwengqondo luhlobo lolawulo olwenziwa ngumntu obizwa ngokuba negunya ngaphezu komnye umntu ochazwa njengolawulayo. Umntu olawulayo uzama ukunyanzelisa intando yakhe kumaxhoba ngeendlela ezintsonkothileyo ezingaphezulu okanye ngaphantsi. Enyanisweni, ukusekwa kokulawulwa kwengqondo kunokuqala ngeempawu ezinobungozi ngokupheleleyo kodwa ezinokubangela ingozi enkulu kwixesha elide.

Indlela yokulawula ngokwasengqondweni inokuba yokuzithandela njengengqondo kodwa isenokunganyanzelekanga njengokuxhomekeka ngokweemvakalelo.

Iimpawu ezi-5 ezibonisa ukuba siphantsi koLawulo lweNgqondo

Akulula ukuchonga ulawulo lwengqondo, nangona kunjalo iimpawu zangaphandle zinokulumkisa umntu olawulwayo okanye abo bakufutshane nabo.

1. Oyena ubalaseleyo usebenzisa iindlela zokukhohlisa eziya kwenza ukuba ixhoba lakhe lixhomekeke ngakumbi kuye. Phakathi kwezixhobo ezisetyenzisiweyo, sinokucaphula ukuchasana ngokweemvakalelo okufumaneka ngokubanzi kubomi bomtshato. Ulungelelwaniso olufanelekileyo phakathi kwesivakalisi seemvakalelo kunye nesivakalisi esithoba isidima. Yile nto emotional manipulator igqwesa ngokwenene.

2. A Ingakumbi okanye ngaphantsi kokungathembisi komntu olawulwayo xa kungekho mntu uthile okanye phambi komntu othile.

3. Uan ukuxhomekeka ngokweemvakalelo enokuthi ibonakale ngokungeniswa ngokupheleleyo. Ubomi bomntu olawulayo bujikeleza kumntu omnye oya kubekwa phezu kwesiseko.

4. I-ukukhanyela okuzibonakalisa ngokungabikho kolwazi lwempembelelo okanye ukwala ngokupheleleyo ukuba phantsi kweempembelelo zomnye umntu.

5. Ukwahlukaniswa okuqhubekayo kokulawula esinokuyibona rhoqo kumahlelo okanye iimpembelelo ezibangelwa sisibini.

Uyintoni umphumo woLawulo lweNgqondo?

Ukwahlula ngowona mphumo uphambili wolawulo lwengqondo. Siyabona ukuba umntu olawulwayo ngokuthe ngcembe uyazahlula kwintsapho yakhe aze aguqukele kumthuthumbisi wakhe.  Umzekelo, uMthi woBomi lelinye lawona mahlelo anzima kakhulu kuba uthintela abalandeli bawo ukuba bafumane ulwazi ngemidiya yemveli efana nomabonakude, unomathotholo, okanye amaphephandaba. Ngokomzekelo, abantu abaselula bayahlukaniswa nabazali babo. Ziba lixhoba elilula kui-narcissistic manipulator.

Loluphi uhlobo lweSifo esiNxulunyaniswe noLawulo lweNgqondo?

Kwicala lomntu olawulayo, ezinye iingcali zinxulumanisa ulawulo lwengqondo kunye nokuphazamiseka kobuntu okunengcambu yazo ekusileleni ngexesha lobuntwana be-manipulator. Ulawulo lwengqondo ke ngoko lunokuba yindlela ethile yokuzikhusela kulowo unegunya lokuzikhusela kuxhatshazo awalufumana ebuntwaneni.

Umntu olawulayo usenokubonakalisa ukuphazamiseka okubangelwa kukungabi naluthando. Iziphazamiso ezinokunxulunyaniswa apha zinokubakho

• a ukudakumba okukodwa

• utyekelo lokuzahlula

• Ukufuna ukuzibulala

Izakhelo ezahlukeneyo zokubonakala koLawulo lweNgqondo

Ulawulo lwengqondo lunokuvela kwiindawo ezahlukeneyo kuluntu lwethu. Kodwa kuya kuhlala kubonakala ukuba zeziphi iimpawu ezinxulumene nefuthe? Kwaye ungayingqina njani impembelelo yengqondo kwabo bakungqongileyo?

1. Usapho

Ubudlelwane bomzali nomntwana bunokuxhomekeka kwiimpembelelo zengqondo. Umzali unokusebenzisa igunya lakhe ukuze ahlonitshwe ngabantwana bakhe okanye ngokuthi emotional blackmail. Nangona kunjalo, kwiimeko zokugxekwa okungakhayo njengokuhlatywa, abantwana banokuphelelwa yintembelo kubo.

Abantwana basenokubhenela ekubeni batyekele ngokweemvakalelo ukuze bafumane nantoni na abayifunayo kubazali babo.

2. Kubuhlobo

Emotional blackmail inokujongwa phakathi kwabahlobo ukufezekisa iinjongo. Ukukhohlisa kunokusetyenziswa ngokukhohlisa umhlobo. Oku kunokuthatha uhlobo lokushiya ulwazi olubalulekileyo kwenye. Kodwa elona nqanaba liphuhlayo lulawulo lobuhlobo lwengqondo.

Umona unokuba ngumthombo wolawulo lwengqondo ukufumana oko omnye anako.

3. Ubuchwephesha (emsebenzini)

Ilizwe lomsebenzi linokhuphiswano olugqithisileyo nto leyo enokukhokelela ku- ukuqhatha ngokwasengqondweni ukuze ugqame kwabanye. I-blackmail ukufumana unyuso, ulawulo lwengqondo ngokoyikiswa kwabasanda kufika abazama ukuziqhelanisa neendawo zabo ezintsha. Ihlabathi lobuchwephesha yenye yeendawo apho impembelelo yezengqondo ixhaphake kakhulu.

4. Kwisibini

Ubundlobongela basekhaya sesinye seziganeko eziphambili kubomi besibini. Ubundlobongela bunokuthatha uhlobo lobundlobongela ngokwasengqondweni ukuthoba isidima somnye. Kubomi besibini, ulawulo lwengqondo luyingxaki xa ulawulo lwenzeka kwicala elinye. Ulungelelwaniso olufanelekileyo kufuneka lusekwe ngokwemvelo okanye ngokuqaphela ukuphepha ukuzalwa kwempembelelo yothando lwengqondo, nokuba ngokuzithandela okanye hayi. I-manipulator ye-narcissistic iya kuzama ukubandakanya kwi-love ibhomu ukomeleza ukubamba kwakhe.

Iingcebiso ezi-5 zokuphuma kwi-Psychological Hold ye-Narcissistic Manipulator

Nazi iindlela ezahlukeneyo zokwazi ukuba ungazikhulula njani kwimpembelelo yomntu?

1. Phucula Ukuzithemba

UA umntu ophantsi kweempembelelo zengqondo udla ngokuzehlisa ngoko ke umsebenzi onzulu wokwandisa isidima sabo kubalulekile. Sincoma ukuziqhelanisa neengcinga ezintle ukunceda umntu othobekileyo ukuba azakhe kwakhona. Ingqondo idlala indima enkulu ekubuyiselweni komntu olawulwayo.

2. Funda ukuzibamba

Abanye abantu banengxaki yokuthi hayi. Mhlawumbi sele uvile ngomntu okhwele iteksi engeyiyo kodwa ngenxa yokungazithembi akakwazanga ukuxelela umqhubi ukuba makame. Okanye nomntu ofumene umyalelo ongeyiyo kodwa wagqiba ekubeni awuthathe ukuze aphephe ukungqubana. Ukuba ungumntu olawulwayo, zixelele, linyathelo elincinci kuwe, kodwa utsiba olukhulu lwenkululeko yakho.

3. Ngokuthe ngcembe zikhulule koyena ulawulayo

Wonke umntu kufuneka azikhulule kumgcini wakhe xa sele engumntu omdala; ukusuka inyathelo ngenyathelo ukusuka kongamileyo kubalulekile ukuzikhulula kulawulo lwengqondo. Ungasebenzisa izangqa zabahlobo ukukunceda okanye ubhenele kwi- imisebenzi yokonwabisa ukucima intloko. Ngaphandle kwamehlo, ngaphandle kwengqondo, kuya kuba lula ukukhulula ukubamba xa kukho umgama othile phakathi kweyongamileyo kunye neyonganyelweyo.

4. Nxibelelana nabacinezelweyo

Ixhoba le-narcissistic manipulator libuthathaka ngengqondo ngoko ke kungcono ukhethe amagama ngononophelo phambi kokuthatha inyathelo. Zama ukunxibelelana nexhoba ngokusekelwe kumava angaphezulu okanye amancinci afanayo.

Usapho kufuneka lukhaphe ixhoba kuyo yonke inkqubo yokupheliswa kwemithetho eya kukhokelela kwinkululeko eqinisekileyo yabacinezelweyo.

5. Sebenzisa isayikholojisti kumaxhoba e-narcissistic manipulators

Kunzima ukubalekela imigibe ye-narcissistic manipulator ngaphandle koncedo lwengqondo yengqondo xa intlungu inzulu. Ewe, i-narcissistic manipulator isebenzisa iindlela ezingaphezulu okanye ezingaphantsi ezingaqhelekanga abantu abaqhelekileyo abanokuthi bazithathe njengesiqhelo.

Kunzima ukuzikhulula kwi-conditioning kwimvelaphi yolawulo lwengqondo ngaphandle kokuvuselela ulwazi. Ingcali yezengqondo iya kubakho ukunceda ixhoba njengecebo lokugqibela. Unokwenza uvavanyo kwimpembelelo yengqondo yowesifazane phezu kwendoda okanye ngokuchaseneyo.