Ukuhlaselwa kwexhala emva kokusetyenziswa kakubi kwe-narcissistic: Ungababona njani?

Uhlaselo lokuxhalaba luyisiphumo esiqhelekileyo nesiyingozi sokuxhatshazwa kwe-narcissistic. Njengexhoba, kubalulekile ukuqonda ezi mpawu zoxinzelelo ukuze uzichonge kwaye uzoyise. Eli nqaku liza kukukhokela kwiimpawu, izizathu kunye nezicwangciso zokujongana nale ngxaki, ukuze uphinde ulungelelanise imvakalelo yakho kunye nokuphila kakuhle.

Iimpawu ezithuleyo zokuxhalaba kumaxhoba oMxhaphazo weNarcissistic

Ixhala elivela kubudlelwane kunye ne-narcissistic manipulator inokubonakalisa ngeendlela ezifihlakeleyo nezingalindelekanga. Nazi iimpawu eziphambili ekufuneka uziqwalasele:

• Ukugqabhuka ngokweemvakalelo okungafaniyo

Usenokuzibhaqa usabela ngokugqithiseleyo kwiimeko eziqhelekileyo. Umzekelo, ukungakwazi ukufumana izitshixo zakho kunokubangela ukukhala, okanye intetho engenabungozi evela kumhlobo inokukwenza ucaphuke. Ezi mpendulo zibukhali zingumphumo weemvakalelo ezicinezelekileyo ezithi ekugqibeleni zibe namandla.

• Ukuphazamiseka ngokomzimba okuzingisileyo

Ukungakwazi ukuhlala uthe cwaka, ukungcangcazela okungalawulekiyo, okanye ukufuna rhoqo ukushukuma ziimbonakaliso zomzimba zexhala langaphakathi. Olu kuphazamiseka lubonakalisa isiphithiphithi ngokweemvakalelo kunye nokulahlekelwa ngumkhombandlela okubangelwa kukuxhatshazwa kwe-narcissistic.

• Ukwahlulwa kunye nokwahlukaniswa kwezentlalo

Unokuziva unqanyuliwe kwinto eyinyani, ube nobunzima bokulandela iincoko okanye uphephe ukusebenzisana nabantu. Oku kurhoxa kuwe kuyindlela defense ngokuchasene nokudinwa kwengqondo okubangelwa luxhatshazo.

• Iimpawu zenyama ze-panic

Ukungcangcazela, ukubila, ukubetha kwentliziyo … Ezi ntshukumo zomzimba zingenzeka nakwiimeko ezibonakala zingenaxinzelelo. Ziluphawu lokuba inkqubo yakho ye-nervous ikwimeko engaguqukiyo yokuqaphela.

Kutheni ukusetyenziswa kakubi kwe-narcissistic kubangela ukuhlaselwa kwexhala?

Nazi izizathu ezibangela uhlaselo lokuxhalaba:

• Ukubuzwa rhoqo ngobunyani bakho

gaslighting kunye nokukhohlisa ngokweemvakalelo okwenziwa yi-narcissist kubangele ukuba uhlale uzithandabuza iimbono kunye neemvakalelo zakho. Oku kungaqiniseki okungapheliyo ngumhlaba obangela ukuxhalaba.

• Ukonakala kokuzithemba

Ngokugxekwa, ukujongelwa phantsi kunye nokunganyanzelwa kweemvakalelo zakho, i-narcissist ikujongele phantsi ukuzithemba kwakho. Oku kungazithembi kuphembelela iingcinga ezinxunguphalisayo nokungazithembi.

• Post-traumatic stress

Ukuvezwa ixesha elide kwindawo enetyhefu kunye nokungalindelekanga kugcine umzimba wakho uphaphile. Kwanasemva kokuba ulwalamano luphelile, inkqubo yakho yemithambo-luvo ihlala iphaphile, ilungele ukusabela nakweyona mpawu incinane yengozi. Oku kuthathwa njenge-post-traumatic stress.

• Ilahleko yesazisi

Ngokuhambelana nolindelo lwe-narcissist, usenokuba uphulukene neminqweno yakho kunye neenqobo ezisemgangathweni. Le lahleko yamanqaku angaphakathi ereferensi ngumthombo omkhulu wokuxhalaba kunye nokungaqiniseki.

Imigibe yokuphepha ukulawula ixhala emva kokuxhatshazwa kwe-narcissistic

Eminye imigibe eqhelekileyo inokuthintela ukuphiliswa. Ukuzichonga kubalulekile ukuze uchache ngempumelelo.

• Ungazibeki tyala ngohlaselo lwakho lwexhala

Khumbula ukuba oku kusabela kuqhelekile xa ujonge oko ukhe wahlangabezana nako. Ukuzivela kubalulekile kwinkqubo yakho yokuphilisa.

• Qwala ukuba ube wedwa ixesha elide

Ngelixa imfuneko yokuzahlula iyaqondakala, gcina unxibelelwano nabantu obathembileyo. Inkxaso yentlalontle ibalulekile ekuchacheni kwakho.

• Sukuzithelekisa nabanye

Uhambo ngalunye lokuphilisa lukhethekile. Gxininisa kwinkqubela phambili yakho kunokuba uzilinganise ngokuchasene nabanye abasindileyo.

• Lumkela izilungiso ezikhawulezayo

Ukuphilisa kuthatha ixesha. Zilumkele izithembiso zokuphiliswa ngokungummangaliso kwaye uthanda indlela ethe chu nehlala ixesha elide.

Uxinzelelo kunye nexhala: yintoni umahluko?

La magama mabini ahlala esetyenziswa ngokutshintshanayo, kodwa eneneni agubungela iinyani ezahlukeneyo zengqondo. Ngamnye umele impendulo eyahlukileyo ngokweemvakalelo kwiimeko zemihla ngemihla.

• Le stress: yindlela yendalo yokusabela ngokwasemzimbeni nangokwengqondo kwimeko ebonwa njengecinezela okanye isoyikisa. Yimpendulo yexesha elifutshane elungelelanisiweyo ehlanganisa izixhobo zethu ukujongana nomngeni ongxamisekileyo okanye ingozi. Ngokomzekelo, udliwano-ndlebe lomsebenzi okanye ixesha elibalulekileyo elibekiweyo linokubangela uxinezeleko.
• Inkxalabo: imele imeko yeemvakalelo ethe kratya nenzulu. Kukhokelela kuloyiko olukhulu, ngamanye amaxesha olungachazwanga, lukhatshwa ziimpawu zomzimba eziphawulweyo ezifana nokubetha kwentliziyo, ukungcangcazela okanye ukuziva uxinezelekile. Ixhala linokuba likhulu kangangokuba limenza angasebenzi okwexeshana umntu ojamelene nalo.

Nangona zahlukile, ezi meko zovakalelo zinxibelelene kwaye zinokuphembelelana. Ukulawula la mava eemvakalelo kufuna ukuqonda iindlela zabo kwaye, ukuba kuyimfuneko, bafune uncedo kwiingcali zempilo yengqondo.

Iimbekiselo zeBibliographic zokuqaphela uhlaselo lokuxhalaba emva kokuxhatshazwa kwe-narcissistic

Nalu ukhetho lweereferensi kumxholo wohlaselo lokuxhalaba emva kokuxhatshazwa kwe-narcissistic:

1. Racamier, P.-C. (1992). Les perversions narcissiques. Paris : Payot.
2. Eiguer, A. (2017). Les pervers narcissiques. Paris : Presses Universitaires de France.
3. Kapsambelis, V. (2023). “Sémiologie et clinique de l’angoisse”. Cahiers de psychologie clinique, (35), 1-15.
4. Le Naour, R. (2007). “Troubles anxieux : diversité des approches théoriques”. Revue française de psychanalyse, 71(2), 389-403.
5. Inserm. (2020). “Troubles anxieux”. La science pour la santé.
6. Calonne, M. (2019). “Perversion narcissique et profil psychologique : validations scientifiques”. Psychothérapie Calonne.
7. Fitahiana, M. (2024). “Les crises d’angoisse après un abus narcissique”. Pervers Narcissique.

Ezi ncwadi kunye namanqaku anika iimbono ezahlukeneyo kumakhonkco phakathi kokuxhatshazwa kwe-narcissistic kunye nokuhlaselwa kwexhala, ukuxuba iindlela zethiyori kunye nekliniki.

Isiphelo: Ngokubhekiselele kwikamva elikhululekile kulawulo lwe-narcissistic

Uhlaselo lokuxhalaba emva kwe-narcissistic abuse lucelomngeni olukhulu, kodwa aluchazi ukuba ungubani. Ngokuqonda imvelaphi yabo kunye nokusebenzisa iindlela ezifanelekileyo, unokuphinda ulawule ubomi bakho beemvakalelo.

Khumbula ukuba ukuphilisa akuyona inkqubo ehambelanayo. Kuya kubakho amahla-ndinyuka, kodwa inyathelo ngalinye eliya phambili luloyiso. Usindile kuxhatshazo, kwaye la mandla angaphakathi aya kukukhokelela kwikamva apho ixhala lingasenalo igama lokugqibela.

Zijikeleze ngenkxaso, yiba nomonde kuwe, kwaye ubhiyozele yonke inkqubela phambili, nokuba incinci kangakanani na. Uhambo lwakho lokuphiliswa lithuba lokuphinda uzibonakalise kwaye wakhe ubomi obunentsingiselo kunye nobunyani, obukhululekile kumthunzi we-narcissist.