I-altruism egqithisileyo kunye nesibheno sayo kwii-manipulators ze-narcissistic

Kuluntu lwethu lwangoku, i-altruism ihlala ithathwa njengento elungileyo. Nangona kunjalo, xa iba kakhulu, inokujika ibe yingxaki yokuziphatha eyaziwa ngokuba ngabantu abakholisayo. Olu tyekelo lokuhlala lubeka phambili iimfuno zabanye ngaphezu kwezakhe alunako ukwenzakalisa umntu nje kuphela, kodwa lubenze babe sesichengeni ngakumbi kwiindlela zokukhohlisa ii-narcissistic manipulators. Makhe siphonononge ama-nuances e-altruism egqithisileyo, ukunxibelelana kwayo okunzulu nabantu abakholisayo, kunye nokuba ingaba yindawo yokuzalanisa ubudlelwane obuyityhefu.

Ukuqonda Ukuzinikela Ngokugqithisileyo

Ukuthanda abanye ngokugqithiseleyo kuzibonakalisa njengesinyanzelo sokufuna ukuzinikela kwabanye, ngokufuthi oko kusonakalisa impilo-ntle kabani. Ngokungafaniyo ne-altruism enempilo evumela ulungelelwaniso phakathi kokupha kunye nokuzigcina, ukuzicingela ngokugqithiseleyo kubangela ukuzincama rhoqo.

Iimpawu ezibonisa ukuzinikela ngokugqithisileyo:

1. Ubunzima bokuthi hayi, nokuba ujongene nezicelo ezingekho ngqiqweni
2. Ukuziva unetyala xa uthatha ixesha lakho
3. Utyekelo lokungazinanzi iimfuno neminqweno kabani
4. Usoloko efuna imvume kwabanye
5. Ukudinwa okungapheliyo ngokwasemphefumlweni nasemzimbeni

Ikhonkco phakathi kwe-altruism egqithisileyo kunye nabantu abakholisayo

Ukuzinikela ngokugqithisileyo kunxulunyaniswa ngokusondeleyo nabantu abakholisayo. Ngapha koko, umntu unokuthi abantu abakholisayo kukubonakaliswa kokuziphatha kokuzinikela ngokugqithisileyo. Abantu abakholisa abantu badla ngokuba ngabantu abangenabubele nabafunde ukucinezela iintswelo zabo ukuze banelise ezabanye.

Olu tyekelo luhlala lufumana iingcambu zalo ebuntwaneni:

1. Imeko yabazali: Abazali abakuxabisa ngokugqithiseleyo ukuzincama basenokuthi bengaqondanga bakhuthaze ukuthanda abanye ngokugqithiseleyo.
2. QIndima “yokudala uxolo” kwintsapho: Abantwana abathatha uxanduva lokugcina imvisiswano yentsapho banokuhlakulela utyekelo olukholisa abantu.
3. Amava okulahlwa okanye ukulahlwa: Ukoyika ukulahlekelwa luthando okanye ukuvunywa kunokukhokelela ekucingeni ngokugqithiseleyo njengeqhinga lokusinda ngokweemvakalelo.

Umtsalane obulalayo wabenzi be-narcissistic manipulators

Ukuzinikela okugqithisileyo kunye nesiphumo sabantu abakholisayo kudala ukuba sesichengeni esithile kwii-narcissistic manipulators. Aba bantu, babonakaliswe kukungabikho kovelwano kunye nesidingo esinganelisekiyo sokuhoywa kunye nokunconywa, batsaleleka kubantu abazinikele kakhulu ngenxa yezizathu ezininzi:

1. Umthombo ongapheliyo wengqwalasela: Isidingo esiqhubekayo somntu okholisa abantu sokukholisa kubonelela i-narcissist ingqwalasela azondla ngayo.
2. Ease of manipulation: Ukungakwazi ukuthi hayi kunye nomnqweno wokugcina imvisiswano ngazo zonke iindleko kwenza ukuba “ukukholiseka kwabantu” kube lula.
3. Ukwanda kokunyamezela ukuziphatha kakubi: Uqhelene nokutyeshela iimfuno zabo, “umntu okholisa abantu” unokunyamezela ukuziphatha okuyityhefu ixesha elide.
4. Impendulo kwimfuno ye-grandiosity: I-altruist egqithisileyo, ngokuzincama rhoqo, ivuselela imvakalelo ye-narcissist yokuphakama.
5. Ukuzalisekiswa kweemfuno zeemvakalelo: Imfuno “yokukholisa abantu” yokwamkelwa ihambelana ngokugqibeleleyo nemfuno ye-narcissist yokunconywa.

Amandla anetyhefu kubudlelwane

Nje ukuba unxibelelwano lusekiwe, intshukumo eyonakalisayo iseti:

1. Umjikelo woVavanyo/ubuqinisekiso: I-narcissist iyatshintshana phakathi kwamaxesha okugxekwa rhabaxa kunye nokuncoma okugqithisileyo, igcina “umntu okholisa abantu” kwimeko yokungakhuseleki rhoqo.
2. Emotional exploitation: I-altruism egqithisileyo “yokukholisa abantu” isetyenziswe ngaphandle kwemida, ekhokelela ekudinweni ngokweemvakalelo.
3. Ukulahleka kwesazisi: Ngokuziqhelanisa neemfuno eziguqukayo ze-narcissist, umntu othanda ububele ngokuthe ngcembe uphulukana nemvo yobuntu bakhe.
4. I-I-Social isolation: I-narcissist inokuhlukanisa ngokuthe ngcembe ixhoba layo, iqinise ukuxhomekeka kwayo kunye nesidingo sayo sokukholisa.
5. Ukuziva unetyala okugqithisileyo: Naliphi na ilinge lokuziqinisekisa livalwa ngokukhawuleza kukuziva unetyala okubangelwa ngumcebisi.

Ukophula uMjikelo wokuZicingela ngokugqithisileyo

Ukuze uzikhulule kulo mzekelo uyonakalisayo, kubalulekile ukuba:

1. Ukuphuhlisa ukuzazi: Ukufunda ukuqaphela iimfuno kunye neemvakalelo zakho linyathelo lokuqala elikhokelela ekucingeni ngakumbi ngobubele.
2. Qinisekisa imida esempilweni: Qala ngokukwala okuncinci kwaye usebenze indlela yakho ukuya kwimida emikhulu.
3. Qinisa ukuzithemba: Sebenza kwixabiso lobuqu elingaxhomekekanga ekuvunyweni ngabanye.
4. Qeqesha ukuzivela n: Ziphathe ngobubele obunokunika umhlobo wakho.
5. Ukuphonononga uBudlelwane: Chonga ubudlelwane obuyityhefu kwaye uthathe amanyathelo okuzikhusela kubo.
6. Ukufuna inkxaso yobuchwephesha: Unyango lunokunceda ukuqonda iingcambu ze-altruism egqithisileyo kunye nokuphuhlisa izicwangciso zokuyinqoba.

Ukujonga i-altruism elungeleleneyo

Injongo ayikokuphelisa i-altruism ngokupheleleyo, kodwa ukufumana ibhalansi enempilo. I-altruism elungeleleneyo ikuvumela ukuba:

1. Nceda abanye ngokunyanisekileyo, ngaphandle kokudinwa
2. Gcina ubudlelwane obunempilo, obulinganayo
3. Zihloniphe iimfuno zakho ngelixa unikela ingqalelo kwezabanye
4. Ukuchasana nokukhohlisa abantu abayityhefu

Ukuqukumbela

Ukuzicingela ngokugqithisileyo, ngelixa kunenjongo entle, kunokuba neziphumo ezibi, ngakumbi xa kukhokelela ku-people pleasing kunye nobudlelwane narcissistic manipulators. Ukuqonda olu tyekelo kuwe linyathelo lokuqala elikhokelela kubomi obulungeleleneyo kunye nobudlelwane obunempilo.

Ngokufunda ukulungelelanisa ukuzinyamekela kunye nokukhathalela abanye, asiyikuxhathisa nje kuphela ukunyanzeliswa, kodwa sinokukwazi ngakumbi ukunyaniseka nokunyaniseka. Khumbula ukuba, ukuzinyamekela asikokuzingca; sisiseko esiyimfuneko sokukwazi ukubakho ngokwenene kwabanye ngendlela esempilweni nenelisayo.