Ubundlobongela obuphathelele kwezemali: Umgibe okhohlisayo wabenzi bobuqhetseba be-narcissistic

Impatho-gadalala yezemali luhlobo olufihlakeleyo loxhatshazo oludla ngokusetyenziswa ngabaqhatha be-narcissistic ukuseka ukongamela kwabo kwiqabane labo. Ngokukodwa i-sneaky ngenxa yokuba ingabonakali ngaphandle, olu gonyamelo lwezoqoqosho lujolise ekuthinteleni ixhoba ukuzimela kwalo ngokwezemali kunye nokuzigcina phantsi kolawulo. Eli nqaku liza kukunceda uqonde ngcono iindlela zobundlobongela bezemali kwaye uchonge izixhobo zokuzikhusela.

Ziqaphele iimpawu zokuxhatshazwa kwezeMali kubudlelwane bakho

Ubundlobongela obuphathelele kwezemali bunokuza ngeendlela ezininzi, ngakumbi okanye ngaphantsi kobuchule. Nazi ezinye iimpawu ekufuneka zikulumkise:

• Iqabane lakho lisebenzisa iulawulo lwemali kwikhaya lakho kwaye liyala ukukunika ufikelelo kwiiakhawunti zebhanki
• Ngokucwangcisiweyo uyayigxeka inkcitho yakho, nakwizinto eziyimfuneko
• Ikucela ukuba uzithethelele nakuphi na ukuthenga kwaye ijonge zonke iziteyitimenti zakho zebhanki
• Uyakwalela ekusebenzeni okanye konakalise amathuba akho omsebenzi
• Uboleka imali egameni lakho ngaphandle kwemvume yakho
• Uyala ukunikela kwiindleko zendlu kwaye akushiye uhlawula yonke into
• Uchitha imali yesi sibini ngokuchitha ngokungakhathali
• Ugrogrisa ngokukunqumla ukuba awuzithobeli iimfuno zakhe.

Ukuba uyaziqaphela kwiimeko ezininzi kwezi, kusenokwenzeka ukuba ulixhoba lobundlobongela bezoqoqosho. Ungalibazisi ukuthetha ngayo kwabo bakungqongileyo kwaye ufune uncedo.

Ukuqonda iindlela zengqondo zobundlobongela bezemali

Ubundlobongela bezemali yinxalenye yesicwangciso sehlabathi solawulo kunye nolawulo lwe-narcissistic manipulator kwixhoba lakhe. Ngokukuhlutha imali, ufuna ukuba uxhomekeke kuye ngokupheleleyo aze akuthintele ukuba ungamshiyi.

Olu hlobo lwempatho-mbi lusoloko lukhatshwa bubundlobongela ngokwasengqondweni obujoliswe ekwenzeni uthandabuze izakhono zakho. Umntu osebenzisa i-narcissistic manipulator uya kugxeka ngokucwangcisekileyo ulawulo lwakho lwemali, ekuphatha njengongakhathaliyo okanye ongakwaziyo. Ngokuva ezi ntetho zithoba isidima, uphela sele uyifake ngaphakathi le ntetho kwaye uphulukane nokuzithemba.

Iintloni kunye netyala nazo zidlala indima ebalulekileyo kule ndlela yokulawula. I-narcissistic manipulator ikugxeka ngobunzima bezemali besi sibini, ikutyhola ngokuchitha imali eninzi kakhulu. Usenokukuthob’ isidima esidlangalaleni ngokuzisa isityholo sokungakwazi kwakho ukwenza imali.

Kancinci kancinci, uzifumana uvaleleke, uvinjwa izixhobo kunye nokuzithemba ukuze uphume ngokwakho. Le yeyona njongo kanye ifunwa yi-narcissistic manipulator.

Imiphumo emibi yobundlobongela bezemali kumaxhoba

Ubundlobongela bezoqoqosho buneziphumo ezibi kuzo zonke iinkalo zobomi bamaxhoba:

• Ilahleko iyonke yokuzimela ngokwezimali kunye nokungakwazi ukuhlangabezana neemfuno zomntu
• Ukwahlulwa koluntu ngenxa yokungakwazi ukuthatha inxaxheba kwimisebenzi ehlawulwayo.
• Ukuwohloka kokuzithemba nokuphelelwa yintembelo kubuchule bomntu
• Ukuxhalaba okuqhubekayo okunxulumene nokungakhuseleki kwemali
• Ubunzima bokujonga phambili kwikamva kunye nokwenza izicwangciso
• Ukuziva unetyala kunye neentloni
• Ukungakwazi ukushiya ubudlelwane ngenxa yokunqongophala kwezixhobo
• Ukuwohloka kwempilo yomzimba kunye nengqondo

Ngexesha elide, iziphumo ze-psychological zinokuba yingozi kakhulu. Amaxhoba amaninzi aqalisa ukuxhalaba okanye ukudandatheka. Bambi basenokude babe neengcinga zokuzibulala ngenxa yokuba bengenathemba.

Kubalulekile ke ngoko ukuba kuthathwe amanyathelo ngokukhawuleza kangangoko kunokwenzeka ukuze uphume kule meko iyityhefu.

Izisombululo ezisemthethweni malunga nobundlobongela bezoqoqosho

Ubundlobongela bezoqoqosho buvunywa ngumthetho njengohlobo lobundlobongela basekhaya ngokwalo. Ngoko ke unendlela yomthetho yokuzikhusela:

• Ungafaka isikhalazo ngokuchasene neqabane lakho ngobundlobongela ngokwasengqondweni. Ubundlobongela bezemali buwela kwesi sikhokelo.
• Ijaji yenkundla yosapho inokukhupha umyalelo wokhuseleko okuvumela ukuba uhlale kwikhaya losapho kwaye ifune iqabane lakho ukuba lifake isandla kwiindleko.
• Kwimeko yoqhawulo-mtshato, ubundlobongela bezoqoqosho buya kuthathelwa ingqalelo kwisigwebo kwaye bunokuphembelela isixa senzuzo yembuyekezo.
• Ukuba iqabane lakho linamatyala egameni lakho ngaphandle kwemvume yakho, unokucela ukucinywa kwawo.
• Unokucela ukuphakanyiswa kobumfihlo bebhanki kwibhanki yakho ukuze ufumane ulwazi ngeeakhawunti zeqabane lakho.

Ungalibazisi ukufuna uncedo kwigqwetha elikhethekileyo ukuze ubange amalungelo akho. Eminye imibutho inikezela ngeengcebiso zomthetho zasimahla.

Ukwakha kwakhona ukuzimela kwakho ngokwezemali emva kobudlelwane obuyityhefu

Ukushiya ubudlelwane be-toxic ephawulwe ngobundlobongela bezoqoqosho akukho lula, kodwa kunokwenzeka. Nazi ezinye iindlela zokufumana kwakhona ukuzimela kwakho ngokwasezimalini:

• Yenza uhlolo olupheleleyo lwemeko yakho (umvuzo, iindleko, amatyala anokwenzeka) ukuze ubone izinto ngokucacileyo.
• Misela uhlahlo lwabiwo-mali olusengqiqweni kwaye ufunde ukulawula iimali zakho ngokuzimeleyo. Imibutho ibonelela ngocweyo ngalo mxholo.
• Ukuba kuyimfuneko, cela inkxaso yentlalontle ukuze ikuncede kwiinkqubo zakho zolawulo.
• Ziqeqeshe kulawulo lwemali ukuze ufumane ukuzithemba nezakhono.
• Zibekele iinjongo zemali ezifikelelekayo kwixesha elifutshane neliphakathi.
• Funda ukuphatha impilo yakho ngemali, ngaphandle kwetyala.
• Zingqonge ngabantu abakhathalayo abakukhuthazayo kuhambo lwakho lokuzixhobisa.

Ukwakha kwakhona kuthatha ixesha, yiba nomonde kwaye ube nobubele kuwe. Inyathelo ngalinye elincinane libalulekile!

Ungalufumana phi uncedo kwimeko yokuxhatshazwa kwemali?

Ukuba ulixhoba logonyamelo lwezoqoqosho, musa ukuhlala ulikheswa. Izakhiwo ezininzi zinokukunceda:

• 3919: inombolo yesizwe yoncedo yabasetyhini abangamaxhoba obundlobongela
• Imibutho ekhethekileyo efana neFNSF okanye iCIDFF
• Oonontlalontle kwicandelo
• Amaziko oLwazi ngamaLungelo abasetyhini kunye neeNtsapho (CIDFF)
• Izindlu zabasetyhini
• Iingcebiso zomthetho zasimahla kwiiholo zedolophu
• Ugqirha wakho oya kukwazi ukukukhokela
• Iingcali zengqondo ezisebenza ngogonyamelo lwasekhaya

Ungalibazisi ukuqhagamshelana nezakhiwo ezininzi ukuze ufumane eyona ndawo uziva uzithembe kuyo.

Inkcazo yebhayibhili ngobundlobongela bezemali

Nazi iireferensi ezisixhenxe zebhayibhili kumxholo wobundlobongela bezemali:

1. Vanderlinden, A. (2016). Violence financière : enjeux et conséquences. Presses Universitaires de France.
2. Goupil, A., & Huet, M. (2019). Comprendre la violence financière : une approche multidisciplinaire. Éditions L’Harmattan.
3. Cohen, M. (2020). La violence économique et ses effets sur les relations de pouvoir. Revue française de sociologie, 61(2), 245-268.
4. Ménard, F., & Thibault, M. (2018). Le harcèlement financier : une nouvelle forme de violence. Les Dossiers de l’éducation, 23(1), 87-102.
5. Lemoine, C. (2021). Violence financière et dépendance économique : enjeux pour les femmes. Genre, Sexualité & Société, 18, 45-63.
6. Bourguignon, F. (2017). Les inégalités financières et la violence : un lien à explorer. Économie et Statistique, 500(3), 15-30.
7. Renaud, J. (2015). Violence symbolique et finance : quand l’argent devient un outil de domination. Revue de sociologie des organisations, 42, 67-82.

Ezi mbekiselo zibonelela ngesiseko esiluqilima sokuphonononga umxholo wobundlobongela bezemali kwii-engile ezahlukeneyo.

Ukuqukumbela

Impatho-gadalala ngokwasezimalini luhlobo loxhatshazo olumandundu olunokuba neziphumo ezibi. Ukuyiqonda linyathelo lokuqala lokuphuma kuyo. Unamalungelo kunye nezixhobo ezikhoyo zokukunceda. Musa ukuba wedwa kule meko, nesibindi sokuthetha ngayo kwaye ucele uncedo. Kancinci kancinci, uya kukwazi ukuphinda ulawule ubomi bakho kunye nemali yakho. Indlela ayilula kodwa inkululeko isekupheleni. Unamandla ngaphakathi kuwe okuya apho!