Ubudlelwane kunye ne-narcissistic manipulator idla ngokuphawulwa nge-emotional roller coaster. Indlela etshabalalisayo ngokukodwa esetyenziswa ngaba bantu ibizwa ngokuba “kukuvuthela kushushu nokubanda.” Eli nqaku lijolise ekuncedeni abafazi abangamaxhoba ale ndlela yokuziphatha eyityhefu ukuba baqonde okwenzekayo kubo kwaye bafumane iindlela zokuhlangabezana nazo.
Umjikelo we-infernal “wokutshisa nokubanda”: Ukucacisa ukukhohlisa okugwenxa
“Ukuvuthela kushushu kwaye kubanda” liqhinga lokuukulawulwa ngokweemvakaleloapho i-manipulator ye-narcissistic itshintshana phakathi kwamaxesha okuqwalasela kakhulu kunye namaxesha okubanda okanye ukungakhathali. Obu buchule buyingozi kakhulu kuba bugcina ixhoba likwimeko engaguqukiyo yokungaqiniseki kunye nokungalingani ngokweemvakalelo.
Ngethuba lesigaba “eshushu”, i-narcissist ingaba nenkathalo, inothando kwaye inomdla. Kukwenza uzive ukhethekile kwaye uthandwa. Nangona kunjalo, esi sigaba silandelwa ngokukhawuleza lixesha “elibandayo” apho liba kude, lingakhathali okanye likhohlakele. Lo mahluko ucacileyo ushiya ixhoba lididekile kwaye linqwenela ukuphinda lifumane ingqalelo nothando ebelazi ngokufutshane.
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Iimpawu ezixelayo “zokutshisa nokubanda”: Funda ukuzazi
Ukuze uzikhusele, kubalulekile ukuchonga iimpawu zesi senzo sobuqhophololo. Nazi ezinye izalathisi:
- Ukutshintshana okungalindelekanga phakathi komsa kunye nokungakhathali
- Ukuthula okanye ukungabikho ixesha elide kulandelwa yimizuzu emifutshane yengqwalasela emandla
- Ukuziva usoloko ukwi-emotional roller coaster
- Imfuneko engapheliyo “yokungqina” uthando lwakho okanye ukubaluleka kwakho
- Ukushicilelwa kwe-walking kumaqokobhe amaqanda ukugcina imvisiswano kubudlelwane
Ukuba uyayibona le miqondiso kubudlelwane bakho, kunokwenzeka ukuba ulixhoba “lokuvuthela kushushu nokubanda” kwe-narcissistic manipulator.
Impembelelo embi ekuzithembeni: Ukuqonda umonakalo wengqondo
Obu buchule bobuqhetseba buneziphumo ezinzulu kwimpilo yengqondo nengokweemvakalelo yexhoba. Inokukhokelela ekubeni:
- Ukuphulukana nokuzithemba
- Ixhala kunye nokudakumba
- Imvakalelo eqhubekayo yokungakhuseleki kubudlelwane
- Ukuxhomekeka ngokweemvakalelo kwi-manipulator
- Ukuphulukana nokuzithemba kwakho kunye neembono zomntu
“Ukuvuthela kushushu kwaye kubanda” ngokuthe ngcembe kutshabalalisa ingqiqo yakho yokwenyani kunye nokuzithemba kwakho kuwe, kukwenza ube sesichengeni sokuphathwa kakubi.
Ubuchule bobuqhetseba be-narcissistic ukutyhila amaqhinga akhe
Ukugcina ukubamba kwakhe, i-narcissistic manipulator isebenzisa iindlela ezahlukeneyo ukongeza “kushushu nokubanda”:
- The gaslighting: Iyakhanyela ubunyani bamava akho, ikwenza uthandabuze imbono yakho.
- Triangulation: Wazisa umntu wesithathu kubudlelwane ukuze avuse umona kunye nokungakhuselekanga.
- Uthando lokuqhubhisa ibhombu: Kukongamela ngothando ekuqaleni kobudlelwane ukwenza uxhomekeke.
- Unyango oluthule: Akakuhoyi ngokupheleleyo ukuba akohlwaye okanye akulawule.
Ukuqonda la maqhinga linyathelo lokuqala lokuzikhusela kuwo kwaye uphinde ulawule ubomi bakho.
Yaphula umjikelo wokuxhomekeka ngokweemvakalelo kwaye uphinde ufumane ukuzimela kwakho
Ukuze ubaleke kulawulo lwe-narcissistic manipulator, kubalulekile ukuphelisa umjikelo wokuxhomekeka ngokweemvakalelo athe wawenza. Nanga amanye amanyathelo okuphumeza oku:
- Busa ukukhohlisa: Vuma ukuba ulixhoba lokuziphatha okuyityhefu.
- Seka kwakhona imida yakho: Funda ukuthi hayi kwaye iimfuno zakho zihlonitshwe.
- Yakha kwakhona ukuzithemba kwakho:Gxila kwiimpawu zakho zobuqu kunye nempumelelo.
- Qhuba ukuzimela kwakho: Phuhlisa umdla kunye nobudlelwane ngaphandle kobu budlelwane buyingozi.
- Funa inkxaso: Zingqonge nabantu abanenkathalo kwaye ucinge ngonyango.
Ukuphilisa emva “kokutshisa nokubanda”: Indlela eya ekwakhiweni kwakhona komntu
Indlela esa ekuchacheni isenokuba nde, kodwa inokwenzeka. Nanga amanye amanyathelo okukunceda kule nkqubo:
- Zinike ixesha lokuphilisa: Ukwakha kwakhona kuthatha ixesha, yiba nomonde kuwe.
- Qeqesha ukuba novelwano: Ziphathe ngobubele obunokunika umhlobo wakho.
- Funda ukuthemba kwakhona: Kancinci, zivule kubudlelwane obutsha obunempilo.
- Jonga unyango: Ingcali inokukunceda ukuba woyise umonzakalo.
- Chaza kwakhona amaxabiso akho kunye neenjongo: Gxila kwinto ebaluleke ngokwenene kuwe.
Izixhobo zokuzikhusela kwixa elizayo kwaye uphuhlise ukomelela ngokuchasene nee-manipulators
Ukunqanda ukubuyela kubudlelwane obuyityhefu, kubalulekile ukuphuhlisa izixhobo zokukhusela:
- Funda ukuqaphela iiflegi ezibomvu ukususela ekuqaleni kobudlelwane
- Sebenzela ukuzithemba kwakho kunye nokuzithemba
- Misela imida esempilweni kwaye ufunde ukuyigcina
- Hlakulela ukuzimela ngokweemvakalelo nakwezemali
- Hlala uphaphile ngokuchasene ne-manipulative behavior.
Ukubaluleka kwenkxaso: Ukufumana uncedo lokubaleka kulawulo lwe-narcissistic
Ukuphuma kubudlelwane kunye ne-narcissist ekhohlisayo ngumngeni akufuneki ujongane nawo wedwa. Inkxaso ibalulekile kule nkqubo:
- Zingqonge nabahlobo kunye nosapho olukhathalayo.
- Joyina amaqela enkxaso kumaxhoba ama-narcisists.
- Jonga igcisa elijongene nokuxhatshazwa kwenarcissistic.
- Funda ubungqina kunye nezixhobo kulo mbandela.
- Ungalibazisi ukufuna uncedo lweengcali ukuba uziva usengozini.
Ukwakha kwakhona ubomi bakho emva kwe-narcissist ukuya kwikamva elizalisekileyo
Ukuphela kobudlelwane obuyityhefu kukwasisiqalo sobomi obutsha. Nantsi indlela yokujonga kwikamva ngethemba:
- Fumana iminqweno yakho kunye namaphupha akho ebekelwe bucala.
- Zibekele iinjongo ezintsha zobuqu nezomsebenzi.
- Funda ukonwabela ukuba kunye nawe.
- Hlakulela ulwalamano oluhle nolulungeleleneyo.
- Bhiyozela onke amanqanaba amancinci ukuya kukuzimela kunye nolonwabo lwakho.
Ukuqukumbela
“Ukuvuthela kushushu kwaye kubanda” bubuchule obukhohlisayo obusetyenziswa zii-narcissistic manipulators ukugcina ulawulo lwabo. Ngokutshintshana phakathi komsa onzulu kunye nokungakhathali, benza ukuxhomekeka ngokweemvakalelo ekunzima ukukuqhawula.
Nangona kunjalo, awunaxanduva lokuziphatha okunetyhefu kwaye unokuzikhulula kuyo. Ukuqaphela imiqondiso, ukuqonda iindlela zokukhohlisa kunye nokusebenza ngokuzithemba kwakho kubalulekile ukoyisa le ngxaki.
- Zingqonge ngabantu abanenkathalo, funa uncedo lobuchwephesha ukuba kukho imfuneko, kwaye ukholelwe ekuxabisekeni kwakho. Ufanelwe kubudlelwane obuphilileyo nobulungeleleneyo.
- Amava akho akakuchazi. Ngokuwunqoba, uya kufumana amandla angaphakathi angathandabuzekiyo, uvula indlela yobudlelwane obuzalisekileyo.
- Khumbula: womelele, unamandla, kwaye ufanelwe okona kulungileyo. Inyathelo ngalinye likusondeza kubomi obukhululekile kwaye obuzaliswe luthando lokwenyani.
Ngaba ufuna uncedo lokuphumelela?
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Want to break free from this hold?
The Complete Narcissism Release (PDF book) and the Musc essential oil guide you step by step – at your own pace, at home.
Want to break free from this hold?
The Complete Narcissism Release (PDF book) and the Musc essential oil guide you step by step – at your own pace, at home.
Want to break free from this hold?
The Complete Narcissism Release (PDF book) and the Musc essential oil guide you step by step – at your own pace, at home.
Want to break free from this hold?
The Complete Narcissism Release (PDF book) and the Musc essential oil guide you step by step – at your own pace, at home.