Ukudibana nomntu onesiphiwo: Indlela entsha yamaxhoba abenzi bobuqhetseba be-narcissistic

Ukudibana nomntu onesiphiwo kunokumela isahluko esitsha kubafazi abaye bangamaxhoba e-narcissistic manipulators. Iprofayile yabantu abanesiphiwo, edla ngokubonakaliswa bubuntununtunu kunye nobukrelekrele obukhethekileyo, inokunika enye into epholisayo netyebisa ngokunzulu. Eli nqaku liphonononga indlela abasetyhini, abakhe balawulwa ngama-narcisists, abanokuzuza ngayo kubudlelwane nendoda enesiphiwo.

Ukuqonda iprofayile yesiphiwo

Umntu onesiphiwo, osoloko ebizwa HPI (Ubukrelekrele obuPhezulu obunamandla), yahlulwa ngeempawu eziliqela ezisisiseko eziphembelela kungekuphela nje indlela yabo yokucinga kodwa nendlela abanxibelelana ngayo nabanye. Ezi mpawu ziquka:

• Ngaphezulu komndilili wobukrelekrele: Abantu abanesiphiwo banobuchule obukhethekileyo bokuqonda, okubavumela ukuba basombulule iingxaki ezinzima kwaye bahlalutye iimeko ngobunzulu obunqabileyo. Olu hlobo lobulumko lunokudala ubudlelwane obuguquguqukayo apho utshintshiselwano lwengqondo luxatyiswa kwaye luvuselela.
• Uvakalelo oluphezulu lweemvakalelo: Uvelwano olukhulu lwabantu abanesiphiwo lubavumela ukuba baqonde kwaye baqonde iimvakalelo zabanye ngendlela entle kakhulu. Olu buntununtunu lunokubenza banikel’ ingqalelo ngakumbi kwiimfuno zeemvakalelo zeqabane labo, eyona nto ibalulekileyo kumfazi oye wenzakaliswa yi-narcissistic manipulator.
• I-I-Introspection ebhengeziweyo: Abantu abanesiphiwo badla ngokujikela kwihlabathi labo langaphakathi ukuze babonakalise, bahlalutye, kwaye baqonde iziganeko ebomini babo. Oku kubonwa ngamanye amaxesha kunokuziva ngathi kuphupha emini, kodwa kubalulekile kwimpilo yabo yengqondo.
• Ukuba wedwaekhethiweyo: Ngokungafaniyo neukubekwa wedwa koluntuUkunyanzeliswa, ukuba wedwa okukhethiweyo kwesiphiwo yimfuneko yokuzola kunye nokurhoxa, okuhlala kuyimfuneko ukutshaja iibhetri zabo kunye nokusetyenzwa kolwazi abaluqokelelayo. Kwiqabane labo, ukuqonda kunye nokuhlonipha le mfuno kubalulekile ukugcina ubudlelwane obuhambelanayo.

Ezi mpawu zenza i unesiphiwo ngokukodwa ingqalelo kwiimfuno zeqabane labo, inkalo ehlala ingekho kubudlelwane narcissists, apho uvelwano lunqongophele.

Imingeni ethile yokunxulumana nomntu onesiphiwo

Nangona ubudlelwane nomntu onesiphiwo bunokubonakala bulungile emva kokushiya i-narcissistic manipulator, akukho mingeni. Le mingeni inokuquka:

• Ukulawula iimvakalelo ezinzulu: Abantu abanesiphiwo basoloko beziva iimvakalelo zabo ngamandla athile. Oku kunokuba sisipho kunye nomthwalo, njengoko basenokonganyelwa ziimvakalelo zabo. Kwiqabane labo, ukufunda ukuhamba kula manzi aneemvakalelo ngamanye amaxesha kunokubhida, ngakumbi ukuba baphuma kubudlelwane apho iimvakalelo zabo bezihlala zingasebenzi.
• Ukutyekela kuhlalutyo olugqithisileyo: Ukuthambekela kwabantu abanesiphiwo ukuhlalutya nzulu imeko nganye ngamanye amaxesha kunokukhokelela ekungaqondani. Umzekelo, intetho elula inokwahlulwa ngeendlela ezintsonkothileyo, ezinokuthi zidale unxunguphalo ukuba omabini amaqabane akakho kubude obufanayo bonxibelelwano.
• Ufuneka ukuba wedwa: Abantu abanesiphiwo bahlala befuna ukuhlehla ukuze bacinge kwaye baphinde bajonge. Kwiqabane eliye laba lixhoba lokuphathwa kakubi, le mfuneko yokuba wedwa inokubonwa njengokugatywa okanye ukungabi naluthando. Ngoko ke, kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuba oku kubekwa yedwa yindlela yabo yokugcina ukulungelelana kwabo ngokweemvakalelo, kwaye ingelulo uphawu lokungabi namdla.

Iingenelo zokudibana nomntu onesiphiwo kumaxhoba e-narcissistic manipulators

Owasetyhini oye waphathwa yi-narcissistic manipulator, ubudlelwane nendoda enesiphiwo bunokubonelela ngezibonelelo ezibalulekileyo. Nasi isizathu:

• Uvelwano lwendalo: Uvakalelo lwabantu abanesiphiwo lubenza bakwazi ukuqonda nokuhlonipha amanxeba eemvakalelo amaqabane abo. Ngokungafaniyo ne-narcissist, i-overachiever iya kufuna ukunceda iqabane labo ukuba liphilise kwaye liphinde lakhe, linikezela ngenkxaso yokwenyani, engeyiyo yokuzinikela.
• Deep Dialogue: Abantu abanesiphiwo badla ngokuthanda iingxoxo ezinzulu zobukrelekrele nezeemvakalelo. Olu tshintshiselwano lunokukhokelela ekuphuculeni ukuqondana, ukuvumela iqabane labo ukuba lizive libonwa, liviwe kwaye lixatyiswe, iimvakalelo zihlala zikhanyelwa kubudlelwane kunye ne-narcissist.
• Ukuhlonipha ukuzimela: Ngelixa umntu okhohlisayo efuna ukulawula kunye nokulawula, umntu ogqithileyo ukuxabisa ukuzimela kunye nokuba ngumntu ngamnye. Oku kuguquguquka kusivumela ukuba siphuhlise ubudlelwane apho umntu ngamnye anokukhula ngokupheleleyo, ngaphandle koloyiko lokuncitshiswa okanye ukulawulwa.

Indlela yokusondela kubudlelwane nomntu onesiphiwo emva kwamava anetyhefu?

Xa ushiya ubudlelwane obuyityhefu, kubalulekile ukuthatha ixesha lokuphilisa ngaphambi kokuzibophelela kubudlelwane obutsha, ngakumbi nomntu onesiphiwo. Nanga amanye amacebiso okusondela kobu budlelwane butsha ngendlela enempilo nelungeleleneyo:

• Thatha ixesha lokuzazi: Ngaphambi kokutsibela kubudlelwane obutsha, qiniseka ukuba uzipholile kwiintlungu zakho zangaphambili. Oku kuthetha ukusebenza ngokuzithemba kwakho, ukuqonda ukuba ufuna ntoni ngokwenene kubudlelwane, kwaye ukulungele ukuqhubela phambili ngaphandle kokutsala unxunguphalo lobudlelwane bakho obudala.
• Nxibelelana ngokuphandle: Unxibelelwano lungundoqo ekuphepheni ukungaqondani. Yiba elubala malunga nolindelo lwakho, uloyiko lwakho kunye neemfuno zakho. Abantu abanesiphiwo ngokubanzi bayaluxabisa unxibelelwano olunyanisekileyo noluthe ngqo kuba lubavumela ukuba baqonde ngcono iqabane labo kwaye bahlengahlengise indlela abaziphatha ngayo ngokufanelekileyo.
• Umonde nobubele: Lonke ubudlelwane bufuna ixesha lokuphuhlisa, ngakumbi emva kwamava abuhlungu. Nikane ixesha lokuqonda iiyantlukwano zenu kwaye nifunde ukuzixabisa. Ububele ngakuwe kunye nakwabanye kubalulekile ekwakheni ubudlelwane obuqinileyo.

Ukuba wedwa okuluncedo: Inqaku eliqhelekileyo phakathi kwamaxhoba kunye nesiphiwo

Inkalo enomdla yokudibana nomntu onesiphiwo yindlela omabini amaqela anokonwabela ngayo ukuba yedwa. Le mfuneko yokuba wedwa inokudlala indima ebalulekileyo ekunyangeni nasekuphileni kukabani. Nantsi indlela oku kunokubonakala ngayo kubudlelwane:

• Ixesha lakho: Abantu abanesiphiwo, njengabantu abaye babandezeleka kubudlelwane kunye narcissists, bahlala befumana intuthuzelo ngokuzola kunye nokuzazisa. Ukuba nexesha lakho kuvumela wonke umntu ukuba aphinde atshaje iibhetri zakhe kwaye abuyele kubudlelwane ngamandla ahlaziyiweyo.
• Ukuthintela ungquzulwano: Ukuhlonelana ngala maxesha odwa kunokunciphisa uxinezeleko nokungaqondani. Ukuba iqabane ngalinye liyaqonda ukuba le mizuzu yokuhoxiswa ayilona uphawu lokungabi namdla kodwa imfuneko yomntu, oku kunokuphepha iingxabano ezininzi.
• Emotional Healing: Kumaxhoba e-narcisists, la maxesha okuba wedwa okwabelwana ngawo anokunceda ukwakha kwakhona ubuni babo. Ngokuba nobudlelwane nomntu oyiqondayo kwaye eyihlonelayo le mfuno, banokugxila ekuphiliseni kwabo ngaphandle koxinzelelo lwangaphandle.

Ukulungelelanisa ubukrelekrele beemvakalelo kunye nobukrelekrele

Enye yezona zinto zinomvuzo kubudlelwane nomntu onesiphiwo kukukwazi ukudibanisa ubukrelekrele beemvakalelo kunye nobukrelekrele. Ngowasetyhini oye waba lixhoba lokuphathwa kakubi, le ndibaniselwano inokubonelela ngomhlaba ochumileyo wokukhula komntu kunye nobudlelwane.

• Intetho Engenamgwebo: Abantu abanesiphiwo badla ngokubuxabisa ubukrelekrele, kodwa bayakuqonda nokubaluleka emotions. Oku kudala imeko apho ukukhula komntu kungakhuthazwa kuphela kodwa kuxatyiswe. Abasetyhini abaye bathuliswa okanye iimvakalelo zabo zincitshisiwe kubudlelwane be-narcissistic ekugqibeleni banokuziva bekhululekile ukuba baziveze ngokupheleleyo, ngaphandle koloyiko lokugwetywa okanye ukujongelwa phantsi.
• Ukutyebisa ngokulinganayo: Ukukwazi ukuxoxa ngezihloko zengqondo ngelixa ukwabelana ngamava anzulu angokweemvakalelo kunokuqinisa ubudlelwane phakathi kwamaqabane. Olu xolelaniso phakathi kwentloko nentliziyo lusivumela ukuba sidale ubudlelwane obulungeleleneyo apho wonke umntu eziva eviwe, ehlonelwa yaye exatyiswa ngoko akuko ngokwenene.

Isiphelo: Ukudibana nomntu onesiphiwo, indlela entsha eya kwinzaliseko

Ukudibana nomntu onesiphiwo kunokuvula indlela eya kubudlelwane obunempilo nobanelisayo kubafazi abasindileyo ekusetyenzisweni kwe-narcissistic manipulator. Nangona olu lwalamano lunokuza nemingeni yalo, lukwanika ithuba elikhethekileyo lokuphilisa kunye nokukhula kunye. Ngokudibanisa ingqiqo, uvakalelo kunye nokuqondana, ezi zibini zinokwakha ubudlelwane obuqinileyo, obusekelwe kwintlonipho kunye novelwano.