About Me
Born into a family marked by emotional abuse, with a narcissistic parent, I struggled with toxic relationships for 36 years. This intense life experience was the catalyst for my inner transformation. Today, I'm living my best life—free, aligned, and fulfilled.
Passionate about psychology since I was a child, I first worked in the world of finance for over 10 years. I held senior positions, including as Managing Director, leading teams of over 200 people. This career path has allowed me to understand that human psychology is a fundamental lever for leadership and collective success.
In 2019, I founded BK SEO MARKETING, an agency specializing in SEO, digital marketing, and brand strategy, runs alongside my artistic work, which I launched in 2023. My expertise has also been built up over the years at Admirals and XTB, where I led sales in the European and French market within the world of trading and finance.
Today, I devote a large part of my energy to the Raising awareness about narcissistic perversion, a silent and still largely unknown scourge. Through my website perversenarcissistic.org and my charity I love myself, I share my experience and offer resources to help victims break free from abuse and reclaim their personal power. I am convinced that this issue represents a a real public health issue, affecting millions of people to varying degrees.
My message is simple: You are not alone. It is possible to break free, to heal, and to rebuild a life full of peace, love, and harmony. What I have experienced, I have transcended. What I have learned, I share. Because yes, a life without a narcissistic abuser is possible—and it begins today.
When Everything Falls Apart: The Divorce That Revealed the Hidden Hell
In 2021, when I thought I was simply turning a painful page in my life by starting divorce proceedings, My whole world collapsed. I thought this decision would finally bring me some peace. But instead, I discovered the dark side: My own family turned against me, like a solid, cold wall. A wall I had never seen so clearly before.
I was alone, misunderstood, judged. And above all, I began to I needed to put words to what I had been experiencing for years without realizing it: narcissistic perversion. Until then, the term was foreign to me. But through the behavior of my ex-partner, and then that of my loved ones, I opened my eyes to a chilling reality: I was surrounded by toxic, manipulative, perverse personalities. All my life, I had given, endured, and made efforts—to be loved, accepted, and recognized. In reality, I had been under their control since childhood.
This divorce was the starting point of a An emotional tsunami. The psychological abuse quickly turned physical. My ex was convicted several times, and the courts issued restraining orders to protect me. But the damage was done. I was devastated.
I had to stop working for For nearly two years. I, who had always been active, successful, responsible—in my career, in my family, in everything—no longer had the strength. The relentless harassment, the family pressure, the betrayals, the legal battles had drained me. Since I was a little girl, I had worked for a dysfunctional family, carried burdens that weren't mine. It was no longer bearable. I was tired, on the edge, but I had finally understood.
I realized I wasn't crazy. I realized what I was experiencing wasn't normal. I realized I deserved better.
At some point I realized that if I continued on this path, It would never end. I was living in a vicious cycle, trapped in recurring patterns that kept me a prisoner of my own suffering. I took a step back, reflected deeply, and finally, I had this realization: I wasn't what I'd been led to believe. For years, I'd seen myself as "less intelligent," "more naive," thinking I was below average, when in reality, I was Gifted. I had been conditioned to think I was inferior, that my worth was linked to my ability to sacrifice everything for others. All my life, I had believed I was solely responsible for my failures, that there was something wrong with me. But It was all a lie. I woke up to the harsh reality: my matrix — my family, my environment, the beliefs that had been imposed on me since childhood — was Rotten. I had been trapped in a distorted view of myself and the world. It was a shock, but also a liberation. I finally understood that I wasn't crazy, and that My suffering was not a reflection of weakness, but of systematic manipulation.
Intensive Work on Myself: My Psychological and Physical Transformation
Faced with this awareness, I decided to start working on myself. Full-time. Psychology has always fascinated me, without me really realizing that, from a very young age, I was looking to to understand the world around me, a world that seemed to make no sense. In my work, I had always used psychology to understand the behavior of others, human dynamics, but I didn't know that there were real predators in this world. That's when everything changed. I embarked on an intensive course of therapy, consulting a A psychologist specializing in narcissistic personality disorder, three times a week, during the most difficult periods. I also explored past life regressions and undertook deep work in Family constellations. These experiences allowed me to deconstruct unconscious patterns and understand the mechanisms that had shaped my life up to that point. At the same time, I decided to take care of my body: I took up sports again, which allowed me to to lose 30 kg. And beyond the physical transformation, I understood that my weight wasn't just a matter of Metabolism: it was a psychological burden, a reflection of everything I had carried for years. This work on myself, on all levels, allowed me to rebuild myself and regain a balance I thought was lost forever.
Family Constellations: A Revelation and a Deep Awareness
One day my cousin told me about the Family constellations, a therapy that radically changed my outlook on life. Initially, I wasn't convinced, but I felt a deep need to understand what was really happening in my family, to unravel the mysteries and suffering that seemed to repeat itself. When I finally decided to try it, it was a revelation. Seeing the deep sorrow in my family, the My father's utter sadness devastated me. Family ties I had ignored or misunderstood for years surfaced before me with great intensity. I became aware of how patterns and secrets passed down through generations influenced my choices, my relationships, and my perception of the world. But this process also brought to light a great Anger welled up inside me. I was enraged, not only to discover all that I had unknowingly endured, but also to realize that certain wounds were hereditary. involuntarily and without my being able to escape it. It was a difficult stage, but also a huge step towards the healing.
My Meeting with Laura Ghita: A Transformative Individual Therapy
In my search to understand more about family dynamics, I decided to follow a Family constellations training course offered by Laura Ghita, a psychologist specializing in this approach. I was aware that I absolutely had to enroll in this training to to work on myself and get out of this seemingly endless inner struggle more quickly. At that moment, I felt an urgent need to reconnect with reality. I felt like The therapies never seemed to end, the constant work on my wounds was exhausting. I had three children to support. zero family to help me, and some endless legal battles with my ex-partner. I knew I couldn't continue to analyze myself forever. to constantly read psychology books. It was crucial for me to to return to active life, to break free from this vicious cycle of inner work, and finally regaining a practical and realistic balance. Laura was a true guide during this period, and her program allowed me to better understand and deal with my family patterns while preparing me to take back control of my life in a more concrete and realistic way.
The First Module in Bucharest: An Experience That is Both Therapeutic and Initiatory
It was during the the first family constellation training module that I experienced for the first time Group constellations in Bucharest. These trips were, in themselves, an essential part of my transformation. Even if I was gaining almost three times more than my ex-partner, I wasn't Never the one who organized travel or daily logistics. He was always the one who took care of everything related to trips or outings. So, finding myself in organizing my own travel, booking a plane ticket, reserving accommodation, finding my way around a city… 37 years old, it may seem insignificant, but for me it was like doing all of this for the first time. And it confronted me with a form of independence I had never really known.
During the 14 years of relationship, I hadn't I never invested in training or personal development. Everything revolved around others, never around me. And now, I found myself having to talking publicly about my injuries, to exposing my emotional intimacy to strangers. It was extremely uncomfortable at first; I was tense, uneasy, almost ashamed. But I also discovered a rare form of freedom and solidarity. I wasn't not alone. And as the days went by, these working groups became spaces of A profound healing, where the bonds of the heart finally prevailed over the wounds of the past.
An Emotional Journey: The Mini-Constellation Exercises
During the first sessions of mini-constellations, something inside me resisted with all its might. My ego wouldn't let go; I cried uncontrollably. It was too hard. At one point, I even thought about To give up, to abandon everything. Despite the After two years of intense work on myself, I felt Raw, as if each exercise touched me to my very core. And yet, looking back, I can say that it was Incredibly effective.
These exercises taught me to not to mix energies, at respecting the boundaries between different therapeutic approaches, and especially to working solely within the family system. It was the first time I truly understood what a Symbolic representation, how energy flows between members of the same system, even without words. At the end of these After five days of intensive training, I returned to Paris. physically exhausted, but with a heart full of new understandings.
I was no longer alone. What I was experiencing, Others were experiencing it too, with their own nuances, their own pain, their own stories. The exercises had... opened up a whole new universe, a new image of myself, made of layers, of forgotten dimensions: my soul, my heart, my inner child, but also My lineage, my family, my parents. It was as if each piece of the puzzle was finally falling into place, slowly, painfully, but clearly.
Understandings, Integration and Transformation through the Modules
As the training progressed, the trips to Bucharest became more and more natural, almost light. I, who at first didn't dare do things alone, surprised myself by loving these moments just for me. Traveling alone, strolling the streets, shopping, meeting dear friends, reconnecting with people I love there... It had become a moment of sweetness in the midst of all this inner journey.
As part of the training, we also worked in small groups each week, and in each session, profound understandings emerged. The constellation exercises became a compass in my daily life: I worked with cards, I felt the energies around me, I set intentions in the field… Even in my role as a mother, I began to better understand my children, to capture what the field of information was transmitting to me through them. I became more present, more embodied in my own life.
But this path wasn't without cost. The year 2024 was intense, punctuated by regular trips to Romania, alongside my sessions with a psychologist. I really wanted to move forward, to cleanse the traumas of my childhood. In my mind, if I had made the immense sacrifice of changing my life, it wasn't to remain stuck in pain, but to live a better life, brighter than the one before. My childhood had been a true hell. When I started working on myself, I found myself crying up to ten times a day, overwhelmed by painful memories that my mind had buried. For years, I had focused solely on succeeding, making money, surviving. But this time, it was about living, truly, repairing myself at the root.
Intense Feelings and Deep Revelations
At the beginning of this journey, I was consumed by rage. A deep, burning anger, directed at everything: my family, my past, injustices, and above all, this feeling of having been The designated victim in my family system. I didn't want to hear anything, neither apologies nor justifications. I absolutely did not want to understand how, against my will, I was sabotaging my own life, how I kept repeating destructive patterns out of a sense of duty to my lineage, out of an invisible loyalty to a system that had hurt me. I just wanted to be done with this legacy, to draw a line under it, to flee this lineage that had hurt me so much.
But family constellations don't lie. They go looking where the mind cannot access, they bring to light unconscious mechanisms of formidable precision. My brain, accustomed to analyzing everything, to seeking logical solutions, I couldn't keep up. I didn't understand why I couldn't "receive" anything, why some performances left me feeling empty, or others exhausted me. I could see that something was happening, but I couldn't put it into words.
And then one day, I saw… To what extent, despite the hatred I thought I felt, I was still emotionally attached to my parents. As if this rage was only the mask of my trauma, the invisible link that still connected me to them, through pain. Mentally, I wanted to run away from them, to cut ties forever. But deep down, My inner child was still demanding reparation, love, and recognition. And as long as I didn't face this truth, I remained trapped in the system, unable to escape freely.
I chose myself, for real
Ce My in-depth work in the field of family constellations eventually had effects that extended far beyond the sessions. My whole life had been A never-ending carousel, a chaos orchestrated by manipulators. My new lover teaming up with my ex. My ex launching absurd legal proceedings, appealing to every branch of the state. Unfounded, solely to exhaust me. Lawyers to pay, files to compile, And always me in the middle, alone to defend myself and my children.
But despite all this tumult, Something inside me calmed down. Month after month, I felt the storm recede, or rather, It was my choice to no longer go there. I left the madness of narcissistic abusers with them. My parents' traumas, I returned them to their rightful owners. For the first time in my life, I chose myself. Really.
In January 2025, during a constellation dedicated to my family, I've reached a turning point. I've symbolically and psychologically given back to my parents what belonged to them, and I have made a profound decision: To live happily. Without invisible chains. Without the weight of others' wounds. Cristina was back. The one they called “the boss.” The one who ran her life. And that toxic carousel I’d been stuck in for years, I left him for good.
I don't even know how I managed not to lose my cool. But What I do know is that It's finish.
When the Light Returns: Finding My True Self After the Storm
In the April 2024 module, I became aware of something deep within myself. I hadn't been tired for a while, I was full of energy—for the first time in a long time. I clearly saw the difference between the Cristina I had at the beginning, the one who carried immense pain and cried often, and the Cristina before my life turned upside down... but in an improved version. More independent, free from toxic people, more constructive, more calm, more stable.
From the first module, a thought came to me: "Even if I had paid much more, this work would have been profitable because it is so rich in meaning." It was, without a doubt, the most transformative therapy I've ever done for my trauma. At the same time, I also opened up to spirituality and began to lead a completely different life. I became an artist, with a thriving psychology practice and a viral presence on TikTok, while continuing my work in finance.
My inner child has become lively and joyful again. I'm still pursuing my personal journey, but today, understanding and decoding are simpler. My colleagues from the constellations course meet every week, and it works in depth. This process has helped me achieve lasting stability. Working in representations has allowed me to understand that my problems aren't just my own. By observing the stories of other families, their similarities or differences to mine, I have found a space for learning, compassion, and valuable insights.
Passionate about psychology, I worked in the finance field for 10 years. As CEO I managed teams of more than 200 people. Everyone's psychology is a universe in its own right and certainly the key to the success of these businesses!
With the site perversnarcissique.org and the charity Je M'Aime, I share my knowledge on the subject and my life experience on the subject of narcissism and narcissistic perversion, the scourge of our society. For me this disease is a real public health problem, little known, even though it affects almost half of the population to varying degrees.
It's also a way of helping people, as I have been able to get help from strangers myself throughout my life. There are not only narcissistic perverts in this world and fortunately! Here we help people understand what's happening to them and move on to a life free of narcissists - your best life! You are not alone and you can make the change to live a fulfilling life, full of peace, harmony and love!
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