Falling in love with a Narcissistic Pervert – Is it Possible?

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If you fall into the arms of a narcissistic pervert, you don't realize it, but you will surely not come out unscathed! The Pn tends to belittle others to enhance themselves. Is a narcissistic pervert capable of loving you? How to make him fall in love? The lines that follow make this point.

Can a narcissistic pervert love?

Men are generally the most affected by this pathology. A narcissistic pervert is jealous, he knows how to lie easily and he does not question himself. He is above all egocentric and rarely shows his emotions. A relationship with this type of person is a toxic relationship and destructive. If you are in this situation, you will surely wonder if he is in love with you or if it is pure manipulation.

You should know that a narcissistic pervert is incapable of truly loving anyone except himself. In a relationship, he can feel loved, valued and even admired. However, he is not able to love healthily in return. Indeed, his own needs always come first to the detriment of your well-being and your freedom. Since he does not see you as a person, but rather as an object, he dominates you and commands your admiration. Manipulating you makes him feel better, and through you he loves himself.

In a relationship with a narcissistic pervert: how is the relationship going?

A relationship with a narcissistic pervert is very difficult to bear on a daily basis. At the beginning of your story, everything is beautiful and he compliments you on everything. But that deteriorates quickly with the disputes, the manipulations and the lies which arrive very quickly. In a relationship, a PN always follows the same cycle.

1. The phase of idealization

During this phase, he sells you dreams and makes you feel special. This phase is the most dangerous, because the narcissistic pervert makes you addicted to him. He then presents himself as the perfect boyfriend. He covers you with love, gifts and attention of all kinds. During this period, the signs of his pathology begin to show, but you are looking for excuses for him.

2. The devaluation phase

Everything he said he liked about you suddenly becomes flaws. He devalues ​​you and tries to break your self-confidence. It isolates you from your family and friends to better submit to you. The PN can become aggressive and even violent (physical violence and psychologically). As he adds a little love to his behavior, you keep making excuses for him.

3. The rejection phase

This phase is one of the most difficult for the victim of a narcissistic pervert. Once you don't bring anything to him, he will dump you. You can then sink into depression or have attacks of anguish and anxiety.

4. The breaking phase

If the narcissistic NP has rejected you and feels that you have suffered enough, they may leave you alone. On the other hand, if you managed to leave the relationship at the time of the 3rd phase, he can try to win you back. In order to regain control over you, the PN will not hesitate to cry or beg you. This is the perfect time to make him succumb to your charms and fall in love with you.

Making a narcissistic pervert fall in love: the phases of the love game

The best way to make a narcissistic pervert fall in love is to run away from him. To achieve this, a few steps must be followed.

1. Succeed and thrive

After breaking with a PN, do everything to succeed in everything you do. Show him that you're better off without him. At this time, chances are he will become obsessed with you.

2. Cut off all contact with him

Calls, messages, social networks… avoid all contact with the narcissistic pervert. In order to make him fall in love with you, the most important thing is to create a vacuum. By doing this, you cut him off from the attention and admiration he needs to feel good. As he is attracted by what he cannot have, he will certainly be addicted to you.

3. Go ahead

After a relationship with a narcissistic pervert, regain control of your life. Men, especially manipulators, are attracted to strong, independent and confident women. They then doubt their abilities and become obsessed with them. But beware, be aware that trying to make a person with this pathology fall in love is a dangerous game.

In love with a narcissistic pervert: how to handle the situation?

Narcissistic perverts are often bright, charismatic, and attractive men. It is then easy to fall under their spell. Over time, you will feel the trap closing in on you, and everyone around you will warn you of the dangers of this toxic relationship.

Do a personal analysis

Take the time to ask yourself if it's better for you to be alone. Weigh the pros and cons of being in a relationship with a narcissistic manipulator. Is what you receive worth what you give up?

Be honest with yourself

Make a list of your likes and dislikes about your partner. Do the positives outweigh the negatives? Can you handle the behaviors you don't like that are destroying you?

Listening

In your relationship, are you satisfied most of the time? Or do you tend to complain to those around you? Take the time to listen and analyze how you feel about your relationship. This allows you to define whether it is really worth it or not.

To be realistic

Be realistic about your relationship. Always keep in mind that you are in a relationship with a narcissistic pervert. You will have to adapt your expectations according to his personality.

What are the dangers of making a narcissistic pervert fall in love?

Falling in love with a manipulator is risky. When he's in love with you, you can become his new obsession. If you reject him, you can inflame his anger. You will then become a target he will want to destroy.

Also, when you are in a relationship with this type of person even if he is in love with you, you are not immune to his destructive behavior. Between manipulations, lies and dissimulation, you expose yourself to a real ordeal on a daily basis.

References

Here are seven bibliographical references on the theme of narcissistic perversion and romantic relationships:

  1. Racamier, P.-C. (1992). Narcissistic perversions. Paris: University Press of France.
  2. Hurni, M., & Stoll, G. (2003). Narcissistic perversion in couples. French Review of Psychoanalysis, 67 (3), 873-893.
  3. Eiguer, A. (1989). The narcissistic pervert and his accomplice. Paris: Dunod.
  4. Hirigoyen, M.-F. (1998). Moral harassment: Perverse violence in everyday life. Paris: Syros.
  5. Sirota, A. (2017). Narcissistic Perverts: Understanding, Outwitting, Overcoming. Paris: Le Manuscrit Editions.
  6. Bouchoux, J.-C. (2011). Narcissistic perverts. Paris: Eyrolles.
  7. Collective (2003). Narcissistic perversion. French Review of Psychoanalysis, 67 (3).

These books and articles offer an in-depth understanding of the relational dynamics involving individuals exhibiting traits of narcissistic perversion.

Conclusion

In conclusion, trying to make a narcissistic pervert fall in love is a risky and often doomed to failure. This type of relationship is toxic and destructive, heavily impacting the well-being of the partners. Rather than trying to seduce or retain a manipulator, it is essential to protect yourself, cut ties and rebuild your life on healthy and fulfilling foundations.

Cristina Balan
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