Isixhumanisi phakathi kokungazethembi nokucindezeleka

Ukuntula ukuzethemba nokucindezeleka yizimo ezingokwengqondo ezihlupha kakhulu umphakathi. Zingawohloka kakhulu ingqondo yomuntu, zimcindezele ngokweqisa kwezinye izimo. Pho singakunqoba kanjani lokhu?

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Isixhumanisi phakathi kokungazethembi nokucindezeleka

Le ukungazethembi okuholela ekungabazeni ukubaluleka komuntu siqu kunesixhumanisi esiyimbangela nokucindezeleka. Ngempela, lokhu kuntula ukuzethemba kanye nalokhu kuthambekela okunamandla kokuzibeka phansi kungalimaza kakhulu isimo sakho sengqondo. Lokhu kungenziwa kube kubi kalula endaweni ecindezela kakhulu ekuphazamisekeni kwemizwa yomuntu. Uma kukhulu ukuntula ukuzethemba, amathuba okuba awele ekucindezelekeni ayanda.

Ukuzethemba Okuphansi – Imbangela Yokucindezeleka?

Kunokuba kube imbangela eyinhloko yokucindezeleka, ucwaningo lusikisela ingxenye enkulu ukuthi lokhu kuntula ukuzethemba okunomthelela. Iqiniso lokuthi umuntu uzithanda kakhulu yena ngokwakhe, ukuthi ucabanga ukuthi usezingeni eliphansi uma eqhathaniswa nabanye limenza buthaka ngokwengqondo. Ngenxa yalokho, kuyacaca ukuthi ngeke abekezelele ukushaqeka okungokomzwelo kakhulu. Lokhu kuntula ukuzethemba kuthinta kakhulu ingqondo ebuthakathaka engawela kalula ekucindezelekeni futhi kubangele ukubamba ngokwengqondo.

Yiziphi izimpawu zokungazethembi?

Kunezimbangela ezahlukene ezingabangela ukulahlekelwa ukuzethemba. Ngempela, ukuntula ukuzethemba kungase kubangele ukuhlukumezeka noma ngisho nangenxa yabazali. Naphezu kwalezi zimbangela ezingase zehluke, zikhona izimpawu ezivamile zokuhlonza ukuntula ukuzethemba komuntu.

• Ukuba nombono noma umuzwa wokungaqondwa kahle
• Ukuzwa ukunganaki kwabanye
• Ukuzizwa uphansi kunabanye
• Ukuba khona komuzwa onamandla wokuba necala mayelana nokunganyakazi kwakho
• Ukuba nokwesaba emehlweni abanye
• Yesaba kakhulu ukugxekwa

Yiziphi izimpawu zokucindezeleka?

Izimpawu zokucindezeleka okulandela ukuntula ukuzethemba zingahlukaniswa zibe izigaba ezimbili.

Izimpawu ezingokomzimba

• Umuntu angase azizwe ekhathele kakhulu
• Amandla aphansi kakhulu futhi uzizwa ungaphumuli kakhulu
• Ukuphazamiseka kokulala, umuntu angase alale kakhulu noma anganele
• Ukuncipha noma ukwanda okubukhali kwesifiso sokudla
• Isiyaluyalu mayelana nentshisekelo yocansi
• Ukuvela kokungakhululeki okuhlukahlukene okufana nekhanda nobunye ubuhlungu emhlane noma esiswini

Izimpawu zengqondo

• Umuntu uzozizwa edabukile kakhulu
• Umuntu uzolahlekelwa intshisekelo emisebenzini yobungcweti, yezenhlalo nezomndeni
• Uyoba nokwesaba okukhulu ukwehluleka.
• wakhe ukuzihlonipha kuzoncipha kancane kancane
• Uyokuthola kunzima ukugxila kokuthile
• Ukwenza izinqumo kuzoba nzima kakhulu
• Imicabango yokuzibulala ingase imfikele

Ungaba kanjani nokuzethemba – Ukuphepha kwangaphakathi?

Isixazululo esingcono kakhulu sokulwa nokuntula ukuzethemba ukuzuza ukuphepha kwangaphakathi. Ngakho-ke, uphinda uthole kanjani ukuzethemba ngemva kokucindezeleka? Nazi izindlela ezahlukene zokufinyelela ukuthula kwangaphakathi.

• Thola i-cocoon ephephile. Yindawo lapho ungashaja kabusha amabhethri akho. Inhloso yayo eyinhloko kufanele kube ukukuthobisa futhi ikuvumele uzizwe uphephile. Le ndawo ingaba ipaki, igumbi lakho lokulala, endaweni yakho yokugeza. Okubalulekile ukuthi kufanele ngaphezu kwakho konke kube ukuzola kuwe.
• Ukuzijwayeza imisebenzi yomzimba. Ezemidlalo ziyindlela enhle yokuthi ubuyele esimweni ngokomzimba nangokwengqondo. Umsebenzi wezemidlalo uzokunikeza ingqondo enamandla kakhulu.
• Hlala uzungezwe. Udinga thuthukisa impilo yakho yezenhlalo ukuze ungangeni ukuncika okuthintekayo. Ukuxhumana nokugcina ubudlelwano bakho nalabo osondelene nabo kungakhuphula ukuzethemba kwakho. Lokhu kuzosiza futhi ukunciphisa ukucindezeleka kwakho mayelana nokubuka nokwahlulela kwabanye.

Ukuntula ukuzethemba nokucindezeleka: Imposter syndrome

Le impostor syndrome okuwukuphazamiseka okunomthelela wokwenza umuntu aphike impumelelo yakhe. Imvamisa, umuntu onalesi sifo ungumuntu onokuzithemba okuphansi kakhulu. Uzobe ekhathazekile futhi uzozicindezela kakhulu, lokhu kuzoholela ngqo ekucindezelekeni. Lezi zimo zengqondo ezahlukene zixhumene ngaphakathi. Lokhu kubonisa ukuthi kubaluleke kangakanani ukuzethemba komuntu.

I-Narcissism ngokumelene nokuzethemba

Singase sithi i-narcissism kanye nokuzethemba kuyafana noma kuncane. Nokho, kunomehluko omkhulu, ngisho nobuhlobo obuphambene. Ngokwesibonelo, ukuntula ukuzethemba kumbhangqwana kungavuna ukuguqulwa kokukodwa kwalaba ababili abe yi-narcissistic pervert. Imiphumela yokuntula ukuzethemba ingamshintsha kakhulu umuntu omaziyo. Yingakho kubalulekile ukwelapha lesi sifo ngokushesha ngangokunokwenzeka ngochwepheshe.

Indlela yokuphatha ukuzethemba okuphansi ngemva kokucindezeleka?

Ukuze uthuthukise ukuzethemba, kungcono ukhethe ukwelashwa okuxubile. Lokhu kunconywa uma ukuphazamiseka kuyingozi kakhulu esigulini. Lokhu kuba njalo ikakhulukazi lapho laba bamuva bengase baveze izifiso zokuzibulala.

• Ukwelashwa ngesazi sokusebenza kwengqondo noma i-psychotherapist. Iqiniso lokuthi lokhu kuxhumene nokuziphatha lidinga usizo lokuba khona komuntu. Ukuba khona kochwepheshe akufanele kuncishiswe. Lokhu kuzokusiza ukuthi uzakhe kabusha futhi ngaphezu kwakho konke, kuzokwazi ukuthi wakhe ubuntu obuqinile esikhathini eside. Ikakhulukazi njengoba iphinde ibe umeluleki we i-narcissistic pervert kanye nempatho yakhe.
• Ukwelashwa kwezidakamizwa kunconywa ezimweni ezinzima kakhulu. Ngempela, lapho izindlela ezilula ezifana nengxoxo, ukulalela ngisho nokuluthwa ingqondo akusebenzi ukudambisa ukuhlaselwa kokukhathazeka. Ama-antidepressants angasetshenziswa ukusiza umuntu othintekile.

Indlela yokubuyisela ukuzethemba ngemva kokucindezeleka?

Ukuze uphinde uthole ukuzethemba ngemva kokudangala, nazi izinyathelo ozodinga ukuba udlule kuzo.

1. Yamukela amaqiniso amanje nawesikhathi esidlule. Kungenzeka ukuthi ukucindezeleka owabhekana nakho kwaba umphumela wokuhlukumezeka. Kumele wamukele ukuthi okwenzekile kwenzekile. Akukho ongakwenza ukushintsha lokhu, ngakho yeka ukuhlukumeza ingqondo yakho ngalokhu.
2. Dlula ngakho ulwe. Kufanele uye phambili, wamukele amathuba amasha atholakalayo kuwena. Zibandakanye emisebenzini enethonya elihle engqondweni yakho.
3. Phila!!! Hhayi ukuthi kufanele ube budedengu, kodwa zibeke engcupheni! Yamukela iqiniso lokuthi akuyona yonke into oyenzayo engalawuleki. Kuyohlale kukhona okuguquguqukayo okungalindelekile ngakho ungagcizeleli ngakho. Ukukusiza ukuthi udlule i-hump, ungafuna usizo kuchwepheshe.

Izikhombo ze-Bibliographic

Nazi izikhombo zebhayibheli eziyisikhombisa endikimbeni yokuntula ukuzethemba nokucindezeleka:

1. Fanget, F. (2003). I-DARE: Ukwelapha ukuzethemba. EParis: Odile Jacob.
2. Guédeney, N. (2011). Izimpande zokuzethemba: iminikelo yethiyori yokunamathisela. babe, 23 (2), 129-144.
3. Ehrenberg, A. (1998). Ukhathele ukuba nguwe: ukucindezeleka nomphakathi. EParis: Odile Jacob.
4. Naudet, M. (2017). Ukuziqinisekisa, ukuzethemba, ukuzethemba… Qonda imiqondo.
5. Inyuvesi yaseSherbrooke. (2021). Ugqhozu lwakho.
6. Isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo uParis 7. (nd). Izixhumanisi phakathi kokudangala kanye nokuzethemba okuphansi.
7. Noblat, R. (2018). Umthelela wokwelapha ngobuciko ekuzethembeni kwabantu abadala abane-depressive syndrome emaphakathi kuya komaphakathi: umthelela wokuzibandakanya esenzweni sobuciko. UFrançois Rabelais University.

Lezi zikhombo zinikeza umbono ojulile ngobudlelwano phakathi kokuzethemba okuphansi nokucindezeleka.