Ungayilawula kanjani imizwa yakho futhi ubhekane ne-narcissistic pervert?

kube isisulu somuntu ophendukezela i-narcissistic Ukuba yisisulu sokuhlukunyezwa ngokuzikhukhumeza kungaba yinto ekhathaza kakhulu ngokomzwelo. Uma ubhekene nokuxhashazwa nokuxhashazwa ngokwengqondo, kuvamile ukuzwa isiphepho sangempela semizwa enamandla futhi ngezinye izikhathi ephikisanayo. Intukuthelo, ukudabuka, umuzwa wecala, ukwesaba, ukudideka… yonke le mizwa ingaba nzima ukuyilawula nsuku zonke. Kulesi sihloko, sizohlola amasu ahlukahlukene namathiphu okukusiza, njengowesifazane oye wahlukunyezwa ngumuntu ozikhukhumezayo, ukuthi uphathe kangcono imizwa yakho futhi ubuyisele ibhalansi yakho yangaphakathi.

Yini i-narcissistic pervert?

I-narcissistic pervert umuntu onobuntu obuyinkimbinkimbi futhi obungase bucekele phansi, obonakala ngengxube yezimpawu ze-narcissistic nezihlanekezelwe. Leli gama, nakuba lingaqashelwa ngokusemthethweni ezigabeni zengqondo, lisetshenziswa kabanzi ukuchaza iqoqo lokuziphatha nezimo zengqondo ezithile.

Izici eziyinhloko:

1. I-egocentrism eyedlulele: I-narcissistic pervert ibeka izidingo nezifiso zakhe ngaphezu kwakho konke okunye, ngokuvamile okulimaza abanye.
2. Ukungabi nozwelo: Akakwazi ukuqonda noma ukukhathalela imizwa yabanye.
3. Ukuphatha : Uhamba phambili ngobuciko bokukhohlisa abanye ukuze afinyelele imigomo yakhe siqu.
4. Isidingo esiqhubekayo sokunconywa: Uhlale efuna ukunakwa nokunconywa ngabanye.
5. Ukuzizwa uphakeme: Uzibona ehlukile futhi efanelwe yimpatho ekhethekile.
6. Umona nomona: Angase abe nomona omkhulu ngempumelelo yabanye.
7. Ukushintshana phakathi kwe-idealization nokwehliswa kwamanani: Angasuka ngokushesha ekudunyisweni aye ekugxekeni kabuhlungu umuntu ofanayo.
8. Ukungabi nokuzisola: Ngokuvamile akazizwa enecala ngezenzo zakhe ezilimazayo.

Ebudlelwaneni, umuntu othanda ukuzikhukhumeza angaba yingozi kakhulu. Uvame ukuzama ukulawula imizwa kulabo abaseduze naye, esebenzisa amaqhinga ahlukahlukene njengokulawula, ukukhanyisa igesi (okwenza omunye umuntu angabaze umbono wakhe ngeqiniso), noma ukushintshana phakathi kothando nokwenqatshwa ukuze kugcinwe ukulawula.

Ukuqonda umthelela womzwelo wobudlelwane nomuntu ohlanekezelekayo we-narcissistic

Ngaphambi kokuthi ukwazi ukulawula imizwa yakho, kubalulekile ukuqonda umsuka wayo kanye nomsebenzi wayo kumongo wobudlelwano nomuntu ophendukezela i-narcissistic:

• Imizwa njengesignali yesixwayiso: imizwa yakho engemihle ngokuvamile iwuphawu lokuthi kukhona okungahambi kahle ebudlelwaneni. Bakuxwayisa ngeqiniso lokuthi umkhawulo wakho uyeqiwa nokuthi uyahlukunyezwa.
• Umbuthano wemizwa ononya: i-narcissistic pervert ifuna ukuvusa ukusabela okunamandla kwemizwa kuwe ukuze ikulawule kangcono futhi ikuthuntubeze. Lapho usabela ngokwengeziwe ngokomzwelo, kulapho eba namandla engeziwe phezu kwakho.
• Ukukhathala ngokomzwelo: ngokungena kwe isondo lemizwa, ungase uzizwe uphelelwa amandla. Lona umphumela ovamile wokuhlukunyezwa kwe-narcissistic.

Indlela yokulawula imizwa yakho? Khomba futhi usho imizwa yakho

Isinyathelo sokuqala esibalulekile sokulawula imizwa yakho ukufunda ukuyibona ngokucacile:

• Gcina ijenali yemizwa: Nsuku zonke, bhala phansi imizwa oyizwayo, ukuqina kwayo, kanye nezimo eziyibangelayo. Lokhu kuzokusiza uthole umbono.
• Nweba isilulumagama sakho semizwa: ngale kwemizwa eyisisekelo (injabulo, ukudabuka, intukuthelo, ukwesaba), funda ukusho imizwa eguquguqukayo neqondile.
• Lalela izimpawu zomzimba wakho: imizwa yakho ibuye ibonakale ngokomzimba (ukushuba, ifindo esiswini, njll.). Funda ukuhlukanisa lezi zimpawu.

Izindlela zokulawula imizwa zansuku zonke

Nawa amanye amasu aphathekayo ongawasebenzisa ukuze ulawule kangcono imizwa yakho nsuku zonke:

• Ukuphefumula okwaziyo: phefumula ngokujulile, kancane ukuze uzolise ngezikhathi zokucindezeleka.
• Ukuzindla kwengqondo: zijwayeze njalo ukuthuthukisa ikhono lakho lokubheka imizwa yakho ngaphandle kokukhungatheka.
• Ukusekela okwamanje: gxila ezinzwa zakho ezi-5 ukuze uphinde uxhumane nomzuzu wamanje kunokuhleba.
• Ukubuka okuhle: cabanga ngendawo epholile noma inkumbulo yokushajwa kabusha amabhethri akho ngokomzwelo.
• Inkulumo yokuqamba: dweba, bhala, dansa… ukuveza imizwa yakho ngendlela eyakhayo.

Ungayilawula kanjani imizwa yakho? Ukuthuthukisa ubuhlakani bakho bemizwa

Ukusebenza ngobuhlakani bakho bomzwelo kuzokusiza ukuthi uphathe kangcono imizwa yakho ngokuhamba kwesikhathi:

• Hlakulela ukuzazi: ukuzazi kangcono futhi uqonde amaphethini akho emizwa.
• Yakha ukuzwelana nawe: yiba nomusa futhi uqonde imizwa yakho siqu.
• Thuthukisa ukuzithiba kwakho: thola izindlela ezinempilo zokuhambisa futhi uveze imizwa yakho.
• Rqinisa isisusa sakho sangaphakathi: zibekele imigomo yomuntu siqu ukuze uphinde uthole ukuzethemba nokuzethemba.
• Sebenza ngamakhono akho okuxhumana nabantu: zizungeze ngabantu abakhathalelayo nabasekelayo.

Zikhulule emizweni enobuthi ehlobene nokuhlukumezeka kwe-narcissistic

Eminye imizwa engemihle ingahlala isikhathi eside ngemva kokuphela kobuhlobo. Nansi indlela yokuzikhulula kukho:

• Khomba izinkolelo ezinomkhawulo: bona imicabango engemihle ngawe egxiliswe umphendukezeli we-narcissistic.
• Zijwayeze yekela : vuma ukuthi awukwazi ukushintsha okwedlule noma ukulawula izenzo zomunye nomunye.
• Zixolele: ungazisoli ngokuwela ogibeni lwe-narcissistic pervert.
• Guqula intukuthelo ibe amandla: hambisa intukuthelo yakho ngendlela eyakhayo ukuze uzakhe kabusha.
• Bungaza ukuqhubeka kwakho: ziqhenye ngesinyathelo ngasinye esincane esiya phambili ekwelapheni kwakho ngokomzwelo.

Ireferensi yezincwadi zokulawula imizwa yakho

Nazi izikhombo zebhayibheli eziyisikhombisa endikimbeni yokulawula imizwa:

1. Lutz, A., & Davidson, R.J. (2003). Ukuhlakulela Okunye Ngaphakathi: Ukulawulwa Kwemizwa Ngemikhuba Yokucabangela. e Ukuthuthukiswa Kwemizwelo Nobuhlakani Bomzwelo: Imithelela Yezemfundo (amakhasi 197-217). ENew York: Izincwadi Eziyisisekelo.
2. Gross, J. J. (2002). Ukulawulwa Kwemizwelo: Imiphumela Esebenzayo, Engqondweni, Neyomphakathi. e Umuzwa (Umqulu 2, No. 2, amakhasi 215-221).
3. Nussbaum, M. C. (2013). Imali Yomphefumulo: Imizwa Nezombangazwe. Izinhlelo ze-La Découverte.
4. U-Lerner, J. S., & Keltner, D. (2000). Beyond valence: Ibheke kumodeli yamathonya aqondene nomzwelo ekwahluleleni nasekukhetheni. Ingqondo Nemizwa, 14(4), i-473-493.
5. I-Lemoine, P., & Wiggins, J. (2014). Imizwa: ukuqonda nokulawula. EParis: Dunod.
6. Scherer, K.R. (2005). Iyini Imizwa? Futhi Zingalawulwa Kanjani? e Isilawuli Somzwelo (amakhasi 24-42). Paris: Lavoisier.
7. Lafrenière, M.-A., & Vallerand, RJ (2013). Ukulawulwa Kwemizwa Ekuphileni Kwansuku Zonke: Umbono Wokugqugquzela. I-Canadian Journal of Behavioral Science, 45(2), i-1-10.

Lezi zithenjwa zihlanganisa izici ezihlukahlukene zokulawula imizwa, okuhlanganisa izindlela zethiyori kanye nokusetshenziswa okungokoqobo.

Isiphetho

Sengiphetha, ukufunda ukulawula imizwa yakho lapho ubhekene ne-narcissistic pervert kuyinselele yangempela, kodwa futhi kuyisihluthulelo sokuzikhulula ethonyeni labo elinobuthi. Ngokusebenzisa amasu ahlukahlukene nezeluleko ezinikezwe kulesi sihloko, kancane kancane uyokwazi ukulawula ukuphila kwakho ngokomzwelo. Nokho, ukufunda ukulawula imizwelo yakho kubalulekile ukuze uzivikele futhi uphinde uthole amandla phezu kwempilo yakho.

Khumbula ukuthi lokhu kuyinqubo ethatha isikhathi nesineke. Yiba nomusa kuwe futhi ugubhe yonke inqubekelaphambili, noma ngabe incane kangakanani. Unayo yonke izinsiza ezidingekayo zokuzakha kabusha futhi uphinde uthole ibhalansi yakho yomzwelo. Zithembe futhi ubekezele: ikusasa elizolile likulindile.