Ungakhuluma kanjani ne-Narcissistic Pervert? 5 Amathiphu

Sonke sifuna ukuzizwa sizwiwa, siqondwa, sixhumene, futhi sisekelwa ezingxoxweni zethu. Kodwa lokho akuvamile ukuba njalo uma kufanele ukhulume nomhlukumezi othanda ukuzikhukhumeza. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi lowo muntu uhlala nomuntu i-narcissistic personality disorder noma ukuthi unemikhuba yokuzikhukhumeza, ukwazi ukuthi yini okufanele uyisho (nokuthi yini ongayisho) kungakusiza ukuthi ukhulume kahle.

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Amathiphu ama-5 okuthi Ungakhuluma Kanjani Nempetha Ye-Narcissistic

Uma usola ukuthi othile empilweni yakho ubonisa izici ze-narcissistic, kunezindlela zokukhuluma naye ezingaba nempilo kini nobabili.

Cabangela lawa macebiso angu-5 ngokuzayo uma uxoxa nabo.

1. Babuze imibuzo ecacisayo 

Un i-narcissistic pervert angase angaboni ukuthi akacabangeli noma ulimaza kangakanani. Qala ingxoxo yakho ngemibuzo embalwa mayelana nezenzo zabo ukuze uvuse ukuqaphela kwabo. Bangase bazijwayeze ukuze bavumelane kakhulu noma bangabi nobudedengu. Futhi lokhu, uma sebebonile ukuthi ukuziphatha kwabo akulingani, kuyingozi noma kungenangqondo kangakanani.

2. Lalela ngokucophelela futhi ubonise isithakazelo:

Ukubonisa isithakazelo kubo kuwukuphela kwendlela yokugcina ukunaka kwabo. Bonisa ukuthi ukunakile ngokubeka ngamazwi akhe akushoyo ngezikhathi ezithile. Ukumamatheka okuphakathi nendawo nokuvuma ngekhanda kulokho akushoyo kuhamba ibanga elide ukumgcina ezolile futhi egxilile.
Babheke emehlweni ngenkathi bekhuluma nawe. Lokhu kukhombisa ukuthi ulalele, kodwa futhi ukuthi uyazethemba futhi unamandla. Zama ukungabaphazamisi ngenkathi bekhuluma. Uma kunesidingo sokungenelela, bheka indawo yokukhuluma bese ulinda baze bahlangane nawe phakathi nendawo.

3. Babonise uzwela

Bheka imizwa yabo ukuze wehlise intukuthelo yabo noma ukuzivikela. I-narcissist ifuna ukuthi uvume imizwa yabo ngoba idinga ukuzizwa sengathi ilungile futhi isabele ngendlela efanele. Isho izinto ezinjengalezi:

 »Kufanele ukuthi uphatheke kabi ngalokho engikushilo, futhi ngiyaqonda ukuthi kungani uzizwa ngaleyo ndlela. Sebenzisa izitatimende ezithi “thina” ukukhombisa ukuthi nindawonye kulokhu futhi nifakane ekuziphatheni.

Ithi, “Sihambe ngonyawo olungalungile,” noma “Singazama le ngxoxo futhi ngemva kwesikhathi.” »

• Ungasho izitatimende ngawe ngaphandle uma kuwukuxolisa (lesi isikhathi kuphela umqaphi ozokhathalela ukuthi uzizwa kanjani).
• Khumbula, uzwela lufundisa uzwela. Ukumodela ukuziphatha okuzwelayo kuyindlela esebenzayo yokuguqula indlela umnaki enza ngayo ngokuhamba kwesikhathi.

4. Hlula ukuthuka kwabo

Ama-Narcissists aba mnene ngoba afuna ukusabela okungekuhle kuwe. Zizwela ngokweqile futhi zikhulisa ukungqubuzana ukuze zigqamise intukuthelo yakho nokukhungatheka futhi zizenze zibonakale ziphakeme.

Uma eqala ukukuthuka, ungakunaki ukucasuka kwakhe – lapho engakwazi ukuthola impendulo enamandla evela kuwe, ulahlekelwa amandla akhe okuxoxa. Ungathathi inhlamba kaPN uqobo. Angazizwa kahle kuphela uma uzizwa kabi, futhi ukuhlukumeza kwakhe ngamazwi kubangelwa umuzwa wokungazethembi okujulile. Amahlaya nokuhlakanipha kungamathuluzi amahle okuqeda ukungezwani nomuntu osebenzisa i-narcissist. Uma bekwazi ukuhleka ukuziphatha kwabo, kungenzeka ukuthi bazivumelanise nezimo (okwesikhashana).

5. Gcina ukuxhumana kufushane ngangokunokwenzeka

Khuluma kancane ngangokunokwenzeka futhi uzinike isikhala. Uma ingxoxo iba namandla kakhulu, thatha ikhefu – sebenzisa indlu yangasese, thola okuphuzwayo, noma thola izaba zokusuka eceleni isikhashana.

• Uma udinga ukushintsha isihloko, mphazamise ngokuthile akuthandayo noma faka ifilimu noma uhlelo lwe-TV ukuze ususe ukunaka kwakhe kuwe.
• Gwema ukuthi “yebo” ezicelweni zabo kaningi. Awusoze wawanqoba ngokuwashweleza futhi kuzokwandisa ukusebenzisana kwakho.
• Ungakhohlwa ukuzivikela. Uma udinga ukubaleka, shiya igumbi uze usesimweni somqondo lapho ungaphinde uhlanganyele khona.

Ungaziphatha kanjani lapho ubhekene ne-Narcissistic Pervert?

Ukuphatha ubudlelwano nomuntu obonisa izici zobuntu be-narcissistic kungaba nomthelela enhlalakahleni yakho nempilo yengqondo. Zama amasu afana nokubeka imingcele ecacile nokuncika ohlelweni losekelo lwabantu obathembayo.

1. Funda nge-TPN

Abantu bavame ukuchaza umuntu onobuntu be-narcissistic njengothandeka futhi athandeke, okungasiza ukunganaki okunye ukuziphatha kwabo, okuyingozi kakhulu. Nokho, kubalulekile ukujwayelana nezimpawu zobuntu be-narcissistic ukuze uzibone kalula. Kungakusiza futhi ukuba uqonde kangcono amandla nobuthakathaka bomuntu, ukuze ulungele ukubhekana nanoma ibuphi ubunzima obuvelayo.

Khuluma nochwepheshe bezempilo yengqondo noma ufunde izincwadi ezibhalwe ochwepheshe bezempilo yengqondo. Lokhu kungakusiza ufunde izindlela ezingcono kakhulu zokuxhumana nomuntu omthandayo obonisa izimpawu zobuntu be-narcissistic.

2. Qinisa ukuzethemba kwakho

Ukuthuthukisa ukuzethemba okunempilo kwenza kube lula kakhulu ukuphatha nokubhekana nezinye zezindlela zokuziphatha ezingaba yingozi ongase uhlangane nazo lapho usebudlelwaneni nomuntu ohlukumezayo ozithanda ngokweqile. Ukwamukela indlela yokuzikhulumela eyakhayo, ukuzijwayeza ukuzinakekela, nokuthola uhlelo lokusekela olunempilo kungakusiza ukuthuthukisa nokuqinisela nokukhulisa ukuzethemba kwakho.

Ukuzethemba okuthuthukisiwe nakho kungakwenza kube lula ukubeka imingcele ecacile, ukugomela, nokumelela izithakazelo zomuntu. Izinto eziningi ezibalulekile zokugcina ubudlelwano nomuntu ophendukezela i-narcissistic.

3. Khuluma ngokungagwegwesi

Kwesinye isikhathi ukuziba okuthile noma ukuhamba nje kuyisinqumo esifanele sezimpi zakho, akunjalo?

Uma uzwa sengathi imingcele yakho yeqiwe lapho ukhuluma nomuntu othile one-NPD, zama ukungasabeli, ukucasuka ngokusobala, noma ubonise ukungenami kwakho.

Udinga ukumtshela ukuthi amazwi akhe nokuziphatha kwakhe kuyithinta kanjani impilo yakho. Cacisa futhi ungaguquguquki ngalokho okungamukeleki nokuthi ufuna ukuphathwa kanjani, kodwa zilungiselele ukuthi kuzoba nzima ngalo muntu ukuqonda noma ukuzwelana nemizwa yakho.

Amaphutha Okufanele Uwagweme Ngesikhathi Sengxoxo Nomphendukezeli We-Narcissistic

1. “Akukho ngawe. »

O, kodwa kunjalo. Konke kuyikho. Ukunyuswa ngakunye kochwepheshe, ukukhulelwa ngakunye kanye nendaba entsha yothando yomngane kuyithuba elisha lokuphinde agxile embonweni kuphela angahlotshaniswa nawo: owakhe. Angase angaboni ukuthi wenzani, kodwa ukukukhomba kuyomane kumenze azivikele.

2. Yeka ukuthi, “Awulaleli.” »

Ukuma futhi ulalele kuyosho ukuvuma ukungazethembi okujulile okuwumsuka wazo zonke izinkinga zakhe: ukuthi akufanele akulalele. Esikhundleni sokuchaza, thatha indlela ehlukile. “Ngingakutshela ukuthi ukuhlinzwa kwami ​​kuhambe kanjani? »yehla kangcono kunokuthi “Angikholwa ukuthi awuzange ungibuze ngokuhlinzwa kwami!” “. Kungenzeka ukuthi ngeke ukwazi ukuthola amagama angaphezu kwambalwa ku…kodwa izinyathelo zengane.

3. Ungasho ukuthi, “Yeka ukudlala isisulu.” »

Nansi into: awukho umdlalo. Ukuziphatha kweNarcissistic kuvame ukuphendula ekuhlukumezekeni, indlela yokuzivikela kanye nokufihla ubungozi bomuntu. Ukuqinisekisa ingxenye yobuhlungu bakhe kudlulela phambili kunokuletha igalelo esakhiweni esintekenteke alengise kuso ukuzethemba kwakhe.

4. Yeka ukuthi, “Lona akuwona umncintiswano.” »

Kuma-narcissists, muhle noma mubi. Akukho phakathi. Yonke into iwumncintiswano: ubani owenza imali eningi, ubani ogcoba i-hamburger engcono, omlomo wayo obomvu ubukeka kangcono. Vumela i-halo yakho ikhanye ngoba, kulokhu, into engcono kakhulu ongayenza ukubuka isidingo se-narcissist sokuwina njengomsebenzi wokuzethemba kwabo okwehlisiwe, futhi bakushiye kubo. Uma ukhathazeka kancane mayelana nesikolo, uzodinga kancane ukuze aqhudelane.

5. Ungasho ukuthi, “Khohlwa.”

Ake sithi ulaxazwa umngani wakhe omkhulu. Uma uphakamisa ukuqhubekela phambili, angakujikela futhi akutshele ukuthi iBFF yakhe (umama, umfowethu, isisebenzi, umngane) imbi kangakanani, noma uchitha ihora echaza ukuthi akanandaba ngoba unendaba. ungcono kakhulu (unamandla, uhlakaniphe, unothile) kunomuntu omzwise ubuhlungu. Noma iyiphi indlela, nguwe okufanele uyiyeke. Lalela kuze kube yilapho izindlebe zakho sezihambile, bese uya ekilasini eliseduze le-yoga yokubuyisela bese ulibiza ngokuthi usuku.

Ungaphendula kanjani ku-PN?

Indlela yokuxhumana ye-PN ibonakala ngokungabi bikho kwengxoxo yezinhlangothi ezimbili. Uma unomngane ongaphandle, oshade naye, noma umlingani othanda ukubhuqa, kungaba nzima ukugcina ingxoxo iqhubeka. Ama-Narcisists ngokuvamile afuna ukukhuluma kuphela uma kuzobasiza ukufeza izinhloso zabo.

• Kubalulekile ukuqaphela amagama ukuze umgadli angazizwa enganakiwe, ebekwe eceleni, noma egxekwa, ngisho nangendlela eyakhayo, lapho uqala ingxoxo. Uma sekushiwo, okuningi okushoyo ngeke kuqashelwe njengoba bekungaba engxoxweni yangempela. Kunalokho, i-narcissist ilindele ukuthi lokho akushoyo kuqashelwe, kubongwe, kunconywe futhi kuqinisekiswe.
• Qala noma iyiphi ingxoxo ngokuncoma, ukuthopha noma ukudumisa ukuze uhehe ukunaka kwe-narcissist. Ukuze ugcine ukunaka kwabo, lalela njalo.

Izinto Ezi-3 Lapho Unqamula Ukuxhumana Ne-Narcissist

• Bangase bazame ukusibuyisela ekuphileni kwabo ngokuba matasa ngathi.

Ngesikhathi besaba ukulahlekelwa yithi, abantu abathanda ukuzikhukhumeza bangase baqale… “uthando lwamabhomu”. Ngokwesibonelo, angase asithumele ngemiyalezo emide kakhulu neyothando nama-imeyili, noma asinike izipho ezikhethekile ukuze asinxenxe ukuba sibuyele kuwebhu yakhe. Ngaleso sikhathi singazizwa sithandwa futhi sikhethekile kakhulu kubo. Nokho, uma sesibuyele ebudlelwaneni futhi bezizwa bekhululekile ngathi, babuyela ngokushesha ohlotsheni oluthile lokuhlukumeza.

• Bazozama ukusisola

Uma sibaluleke kakhulu ku-narcissist, angase azame ukusilimaza nakakhulu ngokuzama ukukholisa labo abaseduze kwakhe ngesimilo sethu esibi. Kuvamile ukuthi ama-narcissist asiveze njengomuntu “ohlanyayo” ebudlelwaneni kuyilapho beveza izici zabo ezingezinhle kithi.

Ngaphezu kwalokho, bafuna ukuzwelana, badlale isisulu phambi kwabanye futhi babatshele ukuthi sizicekele kanjani izimpilo zabo. Futhi, lokhu kuzosiza ama-narcissists azizwe “engcono kune” futhi ephakeme kunathi.

• Bayoba ngokweqile

Bayasabisa, benza okuthile, bayabacupha, bahlukanise abanye ngonxantathu, basakaza ukwaziswa okungamanga, bancenge. Futhi benza izithembiso, benza sengathi bayathuthuka. Ngaphandle kwalokho, basho noma yini ofuna ukuyizwa, vakashela ukwelashwa, ucele abanye abantu ukuthi baxhumane nawe egameni labo, noma baze babe nodlame.

Ama-Narcissists azoncenga, anxuse, avume, athuthuke, amemeze, amemeze, futhi/noma aziphindiselele nganoma iyiphi indlela ukuze bathole ukusabela kuwe.

Ama-NP adla ukusabela kwabantu ngokomzwelo. Uma benganakwa futhi bengakutholi ukusabela okungokomzwelo, bazizwa bengenakuzisiza, bengenakuzisiza futhi bengenakuzisiza. Abanandaba ukuthi bazosabela kanjani inqobo nje uma bekwenza usabele.

Ungakhuluma Kanjani Ne-Narcissistic Pervert emsebenzini?

Noma ngabe iyiphi indima yakho noma imboni, ukuhlalisana kahle nozakwenu akungabazeki ukuthi kubalulekile. Nizosebenza ndawonye kumaphrojekthi ahlukahlukene noma nihlanganyele phakathi nemihlangano. Sesikushilo lokho, kubalulekile ukufunda ukuthi ungakhuluma kanjani nomuntu ophendukezela i-narcissistic.

• Gwema ukuthatha izinto mathupha
• Beka imikhawulo 
• Ungahlanganyeli ekuhlebeni
• Gwema ukwabelana ngemininingwane yomuntu siqu

Imishwana Yokuthuntubeza I-Narcissistic Pervert

Ukulimaza umuntu okhohlisayo akulula ngaso sonke isikhathi. Ngakho-ke, lapho ukhuluma nomuntu othanda ukuzikhukhumeza, kungcono ukugcina ukuxhumana kufushane. Abantu abathanda ukuzikhukhumeza banamakhono okuxhumana nabantu angasebenzi kahle, okusho ukuthi ukusondelana nozwela cishe akunakwenzeka ukukufeza.

Kubalulekile futhi ukuhlala ngokweqiniso kuwena. Kodwa-ke, kungase kube nzima kakhulu lapho ukhuluma ne-narcissist. Ukuthambekela kwe-Narcissistic kubangela abantu abaningi ukuthi benze izinto ngokuvamile abebengeke bazenze. Yingakho kubaluleke kakhulu ukuhlala ungathathi hlangothi kwezokuxhumana.

Izibonelo zemisho ongazisho:

• “Siyabonga ngokwabelana ngalokhu. »
• “Kuzofanele ngicabange ngakho bese ngibuyela kuwena. »
• “Ngiyezwa ukuthi uthini.”
• “Ngiyakubona lokho okukholelwayo.”

Isiphetho

Ukubhekana nabahlanekezeli be-narcissistic kungaba ukuzama. Ikakhulukazi uma kunguzakwenu emsebenzini noma othandekayo oxhumana naye nsuku zonke. Nokho, akudingekile ukuba ube yisisulu sesimo sakhe sengqondo esinobuthi. Ukugcina ubungcweti bakho, ukungazibandakanyi nokuziphatha kwabo, nokufuna ukwesekwa okusebenzayo kuvame ukuba yisu lakho elingcono kakhulu lempumelelo.

Ukuze uxhumane:

• Ukuqamba amanga okuphendukezela i-Narcissistic
• I-Narcissistic Pervert kanye nefoni