Uma i-PN ingakutholi ekufunayo: Yenzani?

Ukuba sebudlelwaneni nomuntu oyi-narcissistic pervert (NP) kuyinto ezamayo engashiya imiphumela ejulile yangemva kwayo. Mhlawumbe esinye sezimo ezinzima kakhulu ukusingathwa yilapho i-PN ingakutholi lokho abakufunayo. Ukusabela kwabo kungaba yingozi kakhulu futhi kuqede ukuqina. Lesi sihloko sihlose ukusiza izisulu zesifazane ziqonde kangcono futhi zibhekane nalokhu kuziphatha okulimazayo.

Kungani i-PN isabela kabi kangaka ekukhungathekeni?

I-narcissistic pervert inesidingo se-pathological sokulawula nokuqinisekiswa kwangaphandle. Lapho izifiso zakhe zinganeliswa:

• Uzizwa elimele ngokujulile ku-ego yakhe enkulu
• Utolika ukwenqaba njengokuhlasela komuntu siqu
• Uphelelwa umuzwa wokuba umninimandla onke asewumlutha wawo
• Isithombe sakhe esihle ngaye siqu sibukelwa phansi

Lamanxeba okudakwa avusa ulaka lwangaphakathi azofuna ukulukhipha ngazo zonke izindlela.

Ukusabela okuvamile kwe-PN ekukhungathekeni

Uma i-PN ingakutholi ukwaneliseka, ingasebenzisa amasu ahlukene:

Ukungathembeki ngokomzwelo kanye nomuzwa wecala I-PN izozama ukukwenza uzizwe unecala ngokunganikezeli ezimfuno zabo. Uzokwazi uku:

• Ukudlala isisulu ngokukhononda ngokuthi awumthandi
• Ukusabisa ngokukushiya uma ungavumi
• Ukukusola ngokuba nobugovu nokungazweli
• Ukwenza ihaba ngemiphumela yokwenqaba kwakho

Umgomo uwukuzilolonga ukuxhashazwa ngokomzwelo ukuze ugcine usuvuma.

Ukuthukuthela nokwesabisa Amanye ama-NP awakungabazi ukuqhuma kwentukuthelo ukuze akwesabise:

• Ukuklabalasa, ukuthuka nezinsongo
• Ukucekelwa phansi kwezinto
• Izenzo ezinodlame nezesabekayo
• Ukubukeka okumnyama kanye nesimo sengqondo esisongelayo

Umgomo uwukukwethusa ukuze ulalele ngenxa yokwesaba.

Ukuthula nokuhoxa ngokomzwelo ngokuphambene, amanye ama-PN azokhetha ukuthula okubandayo:

• Ukwenqaba ukuxhumana izinsuku
• Ukungazi okuphelele ngobukhona bakho
• Isimo sobuso esivaliwe futhi esinobutha
• Ukungabi khona kwezimpawu zothando

Umgomo uwukujezisa ngokuphuca ukunaka kwakhe.

Ukwehliswa nokugxekwa I-PN ekhungathekile izozama ukukwehlisa isithunzi ukuze ubuyisele ukuphakama kwayo:

• Amazwi abuhlungu mayelana nokubukeka kwakho
• Ukugxeka amakhono akho kanye nokukhetha
• Ukuqhathaniswa okungekuhle nabanye
• Izambulo zezimfihlo zakho eziseduze

Umgomo uwukuhlasela ukuzethemba kwakho ukuze ukwenze buthaka.

Ukwehliswa isithunzi emphakathini kanye nonxantathu

I-PN ingazama futhi ukukulimaza emphakathini:

• Ukunyundela abaseduze kwakho
• Izambulo ezinamahloni kwabathandekayo
• Ukudlala ngothando nabanye abantu
• Ukuncintisana nezimbangi

Umgomo uwukukuhlukanisa futhi udale umuzwa wokungazethembi.

Ungasabela kanjani kulokhu kuziphatha okunobuthi?

Ukubhekana nezinkinga ze-PN kudinga isibindi esikhulu namandla engqondo. Nawa amathiphu okuzivikela:

Hlala uzolile futhi ungavumeli ukucasulwa

• Zigcine upholile naphezu kokuhlaselwa
• Ungaphenduli ekuthukweni nasekucunuleni
• Gwema ukuzithethelela noma ukuxolisa
• Phuma ekamelweni uma isimo sishuba kakhulu

Qinisekisa kabusha imingcele yakho ngomoya ophansi

• Veza isikhundla sakho ngokucacile ngaphandle kolaka
• Sebenzisa imisho emifushane, eyiqiniso
• Phinda umlayezo wakho ngaphandle kokungena ezincazelweni
• Zizwe ukhululekile ukuyiqeda ingxoxo uma kudingeka

Zivikele ngokomzimba nangokomzwelo

• Thola indawo yokukhosela uma wesabela ukuphepha kwakho
• Shayela izihlobo noma oxhumana nabo uma kwenzeka ingozi
• Zijwayeze amasu okuphefumula ukuze uzolise
• Bona ngeso lengqondo indawo ephephile yokushajwa kabusha amabhethri akho ngokwengqondo

Ungazizwa unecala futhi uqinisekise imizwa yakho

• Khumbula ukuthi unelungelo lokuthi cha
• Bona ukuba semthethweni kwezidingo zakho kanye nemikhawulo
• Yamukela imizwa yakho ngaphandle kokuyihlulela
• Zibongele ngokukwazi ukuma uqine lapho ubhekene nokukhwabanisa

Qinisa inethiwekhi yakho yosekelo

• Thulula isifuba kubangane obathembayo nabathandekayo bakho
• Joyina amaqembu osekelo ezisulu ze-PN
• Xhumana nodokotela wezengqondo onguchwepheshe ekulawuleni
• Yakha ubudlelwano obusha obunempilo ngaphandle kwabashadikazi

Izingibe okufanele zigwenywe lapho i-PN ingakutholi akufunayo

Kulezi zikhathi zobunzima, kulula ukuwela ezingibeni ezithile:

• Ungazami ukubonisana naye: I-PN ayikho esimweni somqondo esiphusile. Ukuphikisana kuzomcasula kakhulu futhi kwandise le nkinga.

• Ungaxolisi uma ungenzanga lutho olubi: Ukuxolisa kuzobonakala njengokuvuma icala futhi kusetshenziswe ngokumelene nawe kamuva.

• Ungapheli amandla ngokukhathala nangokuthula; Ukuzinikela kuzoqinisa kuphela ukuziphatha okunobuthi kwe-PN ezoqala futhi ngokuphindiselela.

• Ungazihlukanisi ngenxa yehlazo: I-PN izama ukukunqamula ekukusekeleni. Hlala uxhumene nabathandekayo bakho naphezu kwesimo.
• Ungabunciphisi ubucayi besimo: Ukuqhuma kwe-PN kungase kubonakale kudlulele kodwa kuveza ubuthi bayo bangempela. Zithathele phezulu.

Kungani kunzima kangaka ukushiya i-narcissistic pervert?

Naphezu kokuhlupheka okubekezelelwe, abesifazane abaningi bakuthola kunzima ukuhlukana ne-PN yabo. Izizathu eziningi zichaza lokhu:

• Ukwesaba ukuziphindiselela: I-PN ingaba isabisa futhi iphindisele kulabo abalokotha ukuyishiya.

• Umuzwa wecala: Ngokukhohlisa, isisulu sigcina sizizwa sinesibopho sezinkinga ze-PN.

• La ukuncika okuthintekayo : I-NP idala isibopho esinobuthi esenza isisulu saso sincike ngokwengqondo.
• Ithemba loshintsho: Isisulu sibambelela embonweni wokuthi i-PN izothuthuka ngokuhamba kwesikhathi.
• Ukulahleka kwama-bearings: Ngamandla okulawula, isisulu asisakwazi ukuthi yini evamile noma engekho ebudlelwaneni.
• Imiphumela yangemva kwethonya: Ukwehliswa kwenani okuhlaselwe kwenza buthaka ukuzethemba kanye nekhono lokuziqinisa.

Phinda ulawule impilo yakho ngemva kokuthonywa yi-PN

Ukuzikhulula ethonyeni le-narcissistic pervert kuyinqubo ende futhi enzima, kodwa kungenzeka. Nazi izinyathelo ezibalulekile:

• Qaphela iqiniso lokuhlukumeza: Isinyathelo sokuqala ukuqaphela ukuthi uyisisulu se- ukuziphatha okunobuthi futhi kuyahlukumeza. Zizwe ukhululekile ukucwaninga kabanzi ngale ndaba.
• Zinike ilungelo lokujabula: Ufanelwe ubudlelwano obunempilo nokwanelisayo. Ungazizwa unecala ngokufuna injabulo yakho.
• Yakha kabusha ukuzethemba kwakho: Sebenza ukuze ubuyisele ukuzethemba kuwe kanye nokwahlulela kwakho. Ukwelashwa kungakusiza kakhulu kulokhu.
• Funda kabusha ukukhomba izidingo zakho nemikhawulo: Ngemva kweminyaka yokulawula, kufanele ufunde kabusha indlela yokulalela izifiso zakho futhi ubeke imingcele enempilo.
• Pholisa amanxeba akho emoyeni: Umsebenzi we ukuphulukiswa kwangaphakathi kubalulekile ukugwema ukuphinda le ndlela yobudlelwano obunobuthi.
• Phinda ulawule impilo yakho: Zibekele imigomo emisha yomuntu siqu neyomsebenzi ukuze uhlelele ikusasa.

Isiphetho: ukubuyisa ithemba kungenzeka

Ukubhekana nezinkinga ze-narcissist ekhungathekile kuwuvivinyo olunzima kakhulu. Ukusabela kwabo okunobuthi kungashiya imikhondo ejulile. Kodwa ngokusekelwa nokubekezela, kungenzeka ukuthi uzikhulule kulokhu kubamba okulimazayo.

Khumbula njalo ukuthi ufanelwe ukuhlonishwa nokuthandwa. Ngaphakathi kwakho unazo zonke izinsiza zokuzakha kabusha futhi ube nobudlelwano obunempilo nokwanelisayo. Zonke izinyathelo ezincane eziya enkululekweni yakho ziwukunqoba. Zithembe futhi ugcine ithemba: impilo engcono ikulindile.