Ukunqoba Ukukhohlisa Kwekusasa Ebudlelwaneni Be-Narcissistic

Ubudlelwano ne-narcissist bungalimaza kakhulu. Elinye lamaqhinga acashile asetshenziswa yilaba bantu ukukhohlisa esikhathini esizayo, noma “ukukhwabanisa okuzayo” ngesiNgisi. Lesi sihloko sizokusiza ukuthi uqonde lesi simo futhi uzivikele kuso.

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“Ukukhohlisa okuzayo”: izithembiso ezingenalutho

“Ukukhohlisa okuzayo” noma “ukubikezela ikusasa elingamanga” kuyindlela evamile yokukhohlisa phakathi kwama-narcissists. Kuhilela ukulengisa inkohliso yekusasa elimangalisayo ukuze kugcinwe ukulawula isisulu futhi kuvinjwe ukuba siphume ebuhlotsheni.

Izibonelo ezijwayelekile:

• Izithembiso zomshado
• Amaphrojekthi wezingane
• Ukuthenga indlu ndawonye
• Uhambo lwamaphupho
• Ukusekela kumaphrojekthi akho ochwepheshe

Lawa mazwi amahle awafezeki. Umgomo wabo uwukukugcina ungaphansi kokulawula ngokusebenzisa amathemba namaphupho akho owathanda kakhulu. I-narcissist isebenzisa izifiso zakho njengesiyengo ukuze uhlale usebudlelwaneni obunobuthi.

Indlela yokubona “ikusasa lokukhohlisa”?

Ukuhlonza lolu hlobo lokukhohlisa, naka lezi zimpawu ezilandelayo:

• Izithembiso ezizwakalayo kodwa ezingacacile ngekusasa
• Ukusebenzisa iminqamulajuqu noma imicimbi yesikhathi esizayo njengemibandela
• Ukuthola izinzuzo ezisheshayo ngokushintshanisa lezi zithembiso
• Ukungalandeli izibopho ezenziwayo

Ukubukisa: ukubonakaliswa okudukisayo

Elinye isu elesabekayo “ukulingisa”. I-narcissist ibheka ngokucophelela okuthandayo, amaphupho akho, izindinganiso zakho, imibono yakho … bese ibonakalisa futhi ikwenza ukholelwe ukuthi ungumlingani wakho womphefumulo, uhhafu wakho ophelele.

Le nqubo idala uxhumano olwenziwayo, kodwa olunamandla ngokwesabekayo. Isiza ukuzuza ngokushesha ukwethenjwa kwakho nothando. Uzoba nomuzwa wokuthi uthole umuntu okuqonda ngokuphelele, kuyilapho empeleni kuyi-facade eyakhiwe ngokucophelela.

Ukuncika ngokwezimali: ugibe olukhohlisayo

Qaphela izithembiso zokuxhaswa ngezimali okuphelele. Ngokuvamile kuyindlela yokwenza uthembele futhi ube sengozini, ngaleyo ndlela kube lula ukulawula nokukhohlisa.

I-narcissist ingakukhuthaza ukuthi:

• Yeka umsebenzi wakho
• Ukuqhela kubantu obathandayo
• Lahla amaphrojekthi akho siqu
• Hlanganisa ama-akhawunti akho asebhange
• Thatha izikweletu ndawonye

Uma usuhlukanisiwe futhi ungenazo izinsiza zakho, uba isisulu esilula sokukhohlisa kwakhe. Bese kuba nzima kakhulu ukushiya ubudlelwano, noma ngabe buba yingozi noma buhlukumezayo.

Ukukhanyisa igesi: ukuhlanekezela iqiniso lakho

La isigaba sokukhanyisa igesi iwuhlobo oluyingozi kakhulu lokukhohlisa kwengqondo. I-narcissist ifuna ukukwenza ungabaze umbono wakho weqiniso, inkumbulo yakho kanye nempilo yakho yengqondo.

Izibonelo ze ukukhanyisa igesi :

• Ukuphika izehlakalo oke wahlangabezana nazo
• Yenza sengathi ucabanga izinto
• Nciphisa imizwa yakho ngendlela ehlelekile
• Ukukusola ngokuthi “uzwela kakhulu” noma “i-paranoid”
• Guqula isimo ukuze uzenze isisulu

Le nqubo ihlose ukukuqeda amandla ngokuphelele, yehlise ukuzethemba kwakho futhi ikwenze uncike kakhulu kumuntu osebenzisa i-narcissist.

“Uthando lwamabhomu” kanye “nokukhohlisa okuzayo”

Nansi indlela i- thanda amabhomu kungase kuholele ekukhwabaniseni okuzayo:

1. Ukwakhiwa kwesibopho esiqinile somzwelo: Ukunakwa okujulile kudala ukunamathelana okusheshayo, okwenza isisulu sibe sengozini enkulu.
2. Ukusungulwa kokuncika: Isisulu sijwayela ukunakwa njalo futhi singase sincike ngokomzwelo.
3. Ukujwayela kokuziphatha okweqile: Izenzo ezeqisayo ziba yinjwayelo, zibeka inkundla yezinye izenzo ezingenampilo.
4. Isikweletu somzwelo: Umkhohlisi usebenzisa “ubufakazi bothando” lwakhe ukuze enze isisulu sakhe sizizwe sinecala kamuva.
5. Ukuhlukaniswa okuqhubekayo: Ukunaka okujulile kungahlukanisa isisulu kwabathandekayo, kusenze kube lula ukusilawula.
6. Ukushintsha okungazelelwe kokuziphatha: Lapho isibopho sesimisiwe, umkhohlisi angase aqhelelene noma abe nonya kungazelelwe, enze isisulu saso singazinzi.
7. Imijikelezo eshisayo nebandayo: I-manipulator ishintshana phakathi kwezikhathi zothando olujulile nokubanda ukuze kugcinwe ukulawula.

Imiphumela “ye-future faking”

Leli qhinga lingaba nemiphumela elimazayo kuzisulu:

• Ukumosha isikhathi namandla ngokulinda izithembiso ezingasoze zafezeka
• Ukuzizwa unecala lapho ubuza lezi zithembiso
• Ubunzima bokushiya ubuhlobo ngenxa yokwesaba ukuphuthelwa ikusasa elithenjisiwe
• Ukuphazamiseka njengempendulo yokuhlukumezeka.

Izinkomba ze-bibliographic zokunqoba “ukukhohlisa okuzayo”

1. 1. Unpointculture. (2024). I-Future Faking: Nazi izimpawu eziyisixwayiso zokuthola nokumisa izithembiso ezingamanga. I-Unpointculture.com.
   2. I-Santecool. (2023). I-Future Faking: kanjani ukubona nokugwema lokhu kuyenga okunobuthi?. I-Santecool.net.
   3. Asikhulume bafo. (2022). Ukukhohlisa okuzayo: lapho uthando luyizinkolelo nje. ParlonsMecs.com.
   4. BuzzWebzine. (2024). Ukukhohlisa okuzayo: lapho izithembiso ziba amasu okukhohlisa. BuzzWebzine.fr.
   5. Abesifazane Banamuhla. (2024). Ukukhohlisa okuzayo: ungalugwema kanjani lolu gibe lothando?. FemmesdAujourdhui.be.
   6. UMary Da Cruz. (2022). Ukukhohlisa okuzayo: lapho uthando luba ukukhohlisa. ParlonsMecs.com.
   7. Abesifazane Banamuhla. (2023). Ukukhohlisa okuzayo: izithembiso nokudumazeka. FemmesdAujourdhui.be.

   Lezi zihloko zinikeza umbono obanzi mayelana nezinqubo nomthelela wokukhohlisa esikhathini esizayo, ukubhekana nokukhohliswa kwemizwelo, amandla obudlelwano obunobuthi, namasu okubhekana nakho.

Isiphetho

Ukukhohlisa okuzayo kuyisu elesabekayo elisetshenziswa abahlanekezeli be-narcissistic. Ngokuqonda ukuthi isebenza kanjani futhi uhlale uqaphile, ungazivikela kukho futhi wakhe kabusha impilo enempilo negculisayo. Khumbula ukuthi ufanelwe ubuhlobo obusekelwe ekwethembeni nasekuhlonipheni.