Inzondo kanye nokucasuka ngemva kobudlelwane nomuntu ophendukezela i-narcissistic

Ubusebudlelwaneni obuyingozi nomuntu ohlukumezayo ozithanda ngokweqile, futhi manje njengoba sekuphelile, uzizwa ukhungathekile yimizwa yenzondo nentukuthelo. Le mizwa enamandla ivamile ngemva kokubhekana nokuxhashazwa nokuhlukunyezwa ngokwengqondo, kodwa ingaba umthwalo okuvimbela ukuthi uqhubekele phambili. Lesi sihloko sizokusiza uqonde inzondo nentukuthelo. rancor kanye nokuthola izindlela ezinempilo zokuzilawula ukuze uthole ukuthula kwengqondo.

Qonda umehluko phakathi kwentukuthelo nokucasuka

Intukuthelo iwumzwelo ongokwemvelo nonempilo ovela lapho ubhekene nokungabi nabulungisa nokuphathwa kabi. Kungaba amandla ashukumisayo ukuze azivikele futhi azigomele. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, intukuthelo iwuhlobo lwentukuthelo olukhula ngokuhamba kwesikhathi futhi lube yingozi. Ibonakala ngokuthi:

• Amahemuhemu abukhali ngomonakalo owenziwe
• Isifiso sokuziphindiselela esithatha imicabango yakho
• Umuzwa wokucasuka ofaka ubuthi empilweni yakho yansuku zonke
• Ubunzima bokuqhubekela phambili nokugxila enhlalakahleni yakho

Kubalulekile ukuqaphela umehluko phakathi kwalezi zimo ezimbili zemizwa ukuze ukwazi ukuzilawula ngendlela efanele.

Kungani ukucasuka kwenzeka ngemva kobudlelwane be-narcissistic?

Ubudlelwano nomuntu ophendukezela i-narcissistic ngokuvamile bushiya imiphumela ejulile yemizwa ekhuthaza ukubukeka kokucasuka:

• Uhlukunyezwe ngokuphindiwe kanye nokuhlukunyezwa ngokomqondo
• Ukuthembela kwakho kuwena nakwabanye kwephukile
• Uzizwa ukhashelwe futhi usetshenziswa
• Uzizwa sengathi umoshe isikhathi namandla kulobu budlelwano
• Umdidiyeli ubonakala ephunyuka engenamyocu eqhubeka nempilo yakhe sengathi akwenzekanga lutho.

Lezi zici zibhebhezela umuzwa wokungabi nabulungisa ongaphenduka kalula ube ukucasuka okunenkani uma ungalawulwa.

Izingozi zokubambelela enzondweni namagqubu

Nakuba le mizwa ingase ibonakale ilungile, ukubambelela kuyo kubeka engcupheni eminingi enhlalakahleni nasekwelapheni kwakho:

• Bagcina ukuxhumana okungokomzwelo nozakwethu wangaphambili we-narcissistic
• Zikuvimbela ukuthi ugxile ekwelapheni nasekukhuleni kwakho
• Zingathinta kabi ubudlelwano bakho besikhathi esizayo
• Zinomthelela omubi empilweni yakho yengqondo nengokomzimba yesikhathi eside
• Zikugcina usesimweni sokuba yisisulu esikhundleni sokuba umlingisi empilweni yakho.

Indlela yokuguqula intukuthelo yakho ibe amandla amahle?

Intukuthelo ingahanjiswa ngendlela eyakhayo ukuze ikusize uphole futhi uqhubekele phambili:

1. Vuma ukuba semthethweni kwentukuthelo yakho ngaphandle kokwahlulela
2. Yiveze ngezindlela ezinempilo (ezemidlalo, ubuciko, ukubhala, ukwelashwa)
3. Yisebenzise njengesisusa sokubeka imingcele ecacile ebudlelwaneni bakho besikhathi esizayo
4. Kuguqule kube ukuzimisela ukwakha kabusha impilo yakho ngokwemibandela yakho.

Inzondo namagqubu: Imithelela empilweni

Umthelela wenzondo namagqubu uzibonakalisa ngokujulile ezimpilweni zethu, ube nomthelela ebudlelwaneni bethu nempilo yethu engokwengqondo.

• Imiphumela yomuntu siqu
  • Ukulahlekelwa injabulo yokuphila
  • Ubunzima bokwethemba
  • Ukuzihlukanisa emphakathini
  • Izinkinga zempilo ngokomzimba nangokwengqondo
• Imiphumela yobudlelwano
  • Ukucekelwa phansi kwezibopho zomndeni
  • Ukungakwazi ukugcina ubudlelwano obunempilo
  • Ukuveza i-negativity kwabanye
  • Isiyingi esinonya sesizungu

Amasu okulawula imicabango exakile

Uma uzithola ucabanga ngozakwenu wangaphambili we-narcissistic noma ufukamela amaphupho okuziphindiselela, zama lawa maqhinga:

• Ukuqaphela: qaphela imicabango yakho ngaphandle kokuyihlulela, bese uyiyeka idlule
• Ukuphazamiseka okuhle: hlanganyela emsebenzini owuthandayo ukuze uqondise kabusha ukunaka kwakho
• Ukubuka ngeso lengqondo: cabanga imicabango yakho engemihle ikhukhuleka njengamafu esibhakabhakeni
• Ukuzizwela: ziphathe ngomusa njengoba ubungenza kumngane.

Ukwakha kabusha ukuzethemba ukuze unqobe inzondo namagqubu

A weak ukuziqinisekisa kungabhebhethekisa ukucasuka. Nansi indlela yokuyiqinisa:

• Thola futhi ugubhe izimfanelo zakho kanye nempumelelo yakho
• Zibekele imigomo engokoqobo nefinyelelekayo
• Zinakekele ngokomzimba nangokomzwelo
• Funda ukwenqaba futhi ubeke imingcele enempilo
• Zizungeze nabantu abakwazisayo.

Umkhuba wokuthethelela njengethuluzi lenkululeko

Ukuthethelela akusho ukuthethelela izenzo zomxolisi noma ukuxhumana. Kuyisenzo sokuzikhulula:

• Yazi ukuthi ukuthethelela kuyinqubo, hhayi into yesikhathi esisodwa
• Qala ngokuzixolela ngamaphutha ocabanga ukuthi uwenzile.
• Bona ngeso lengqondo ukuthethelela njengesenzo sokukhulula amaketanga akho emizwa
• Zijwayeze ukuthethelela okuqondisiwe noma ubhale incwadi yokuthethelela ongeke uyithumele.

Nini ukubonisana nochwepheshe?

Uma, naphezu kwemizamo yakho, uzizwa ugajwe inzondo nokucasuka, ungangabazi ukubonana nochwepheshe bezempilo yengqondo. Lokhu kubaluleke kakhulu uma:

• Imizwa yakho engemihle ithinta kakhulu izinga lakho lempilo
• Unemicabango yokuzibulala noma ukuzilimaza
• Uzizwa ungakwazi ukusebenza ngendlela evamile ekuphileni kwansuku zonke
• Uthuthukisa ukuziphatha okuluthayo ukuze ubhekane nemizwa yakho

Umelaphi angakusiza ukuthi ubhekane nokuhlukumezeka okucashile futhi uthuthukise amasu okubhekana nesimo esinempilo.

Ireferensi yezincwadi ngenzondo namagqubu

Nazi izikhombo zebhayibheli eziyisikhombisa endikimbeni yenzondo namagqubu:

1. Cohen, E. (2008). Ukuzonda abanye. I-eseyi emayelana nezinqubo zenzondo ehlangene. Paris: Editions de la Maison des sciences de l’homme.
2. Bourdieu, P. (1997). Ukubusa kwabesilisa. I-Paris: I-Threshold.
3. Sartre, J.-P. (1948). Ukucabanga ngombuzo wamaJuda. EParis: Gallimard.
4. Lemoine, D. (2015). Amagqubu, ushevu emphakathini. I-Paris: Izinguqulo ze-du Cerf.
5. Meyer, C. (2016). Inzondo nesifiso. Izimiso zokuziphatha. Paris: Presses Universitaires de France.
6. Tilly, C. (2003). Inzondo. Isayensi yezenhlalo yodlame. I-Paris: I-Editions La Découverte.
7. Fischer, L. (2011). Usizi lwenzondo: Impi yemizwa kungxabano yakwa-Israel-Palestine. I-Paris: Editions de l’Aube.

Lezi zikhombo zihlanganisa izici ezihlukahlukene zenzondo namagqubu.

Isiphetho

Sengiphetha, inzondo nokucasuka kuwukusabela okungokwemvelo ngemva kobudlelwane nomuntu ophendukezela i-narcissistic, kodwa kubalulekile ukuthi ungagxili kukho. Ngokufunda ukuphatha le mizwa ngendlela eyakhayo futhi ugxile ekukhuleni kwakho, awukwazi ukuzikhulula kuphela emiphumeleni yayo. ubambe, kodwa futhi yakhe impilo eyanelisayo neyiqiniso. Khumbula ukuthi “impindiselo” yakho engcono kakhulu iwukuphila ngokugcwele nangenjabulo, ukhululekile ethonyeni elinobuthi lozakwethu wangaphambili we-narcissistic.