Incazelo yokuphika: Ukuqonda le ndlela yokuphunyuka ngokwengqondo

Umqondo wokuphika, ovame ukufundwa kwezengqondo, ubonakala uyindlela eyinkimbinkimbi futhi etholakala yonke indawo ekuphileni kwethu. Ngokuvamile uhlotshaniswa nobudlelwano obunobuthi, ukuphika kuyindlela yokugwema lapho ubhekene neqiniso elibuhlungu noma elingakhululekile. Lesi sihloko sihlola ngokujulile incazelo yokuphika, ukubonakaliswa kwako, kanye nezizathu zokuthi kungani kwenzeka. indlela yokuzivikela Kuyaqhubeka kubantu abaningi. Ngokuqonda lo mqondo, singakuqonda kangcono ukuziphatha kwabantu ngokujwayelekile kanye nalokho okukhona ebudlelwaneni bokuzikhukhumeza ikakhulukazi.

Kuyini Ukuphika?

Igama elithi “ukuphika” libhekisela ekuphenduleni kwengqondo okuhloswe ukwenqaba noma ukuziba amaqiniso noma imizwa engasenza singakhululeki. Le ndlela yokuzivikela ngokuvamile ayizikhetheli: ivumela umuntu ukuthi azivikele okwesikhashana eqinisweni eliphazamisayo. Igama elithi “ukuphika incazelo” libhekisela ocwaningweni lwalo mbono njengomqondo ongokwengqondo nezenhlalo.

Ukuphika kwenzeka ngezindlela ezahlukene futhi ezimweni ezahlukene:

• Ebudlelwaneni bomuntu siqu, ikakhulukazi ebudlelwaneni obunobuthi, ukuphika kungafihla ukuziphatha okuhlukumezayo.
• Empilweni yansuku zonke, kungavimbela umuntu ekwamukeleni amaqiniso aphazamisayo, njengezinkinga zempilo noma izinkinga zezimali.
• Ebudlelwaneni be-narcissistic, ukuphika kungaqiniswa inkohliso yokugcina ubuhlobo “obuhle”.

Ukubonakaliswa okuhlukile kokuphika

Ukuphika akuzivezi njalo ngezindlela ezisobala. Kuye ngesimo, kuthatha izinhlobo eziningana:

1. Ukuphika iqiniso

Lolu hlobo lokuphika luhlanganisa ukwenqaba iqiniso eliwumgomo. Umuntu angase, isibonelo, enqabe ukwamukela ukuxilongwa kwezokwelapha noma aphike ukungathembeki komlingani wakhe, ngisho nalapho ebhekene nobufakazi. Lolu hlobo lokuphika luvame ukubangelwa ukwesaba ukubhekana neqiniso nokungakhululeki ngokomzwelo.

2. Ukuphika imizwa

Ukuphika kungase kuhlanganise nemizwelo, ikakhulukazi lapho ibuhlungu noma iphazamisa. Ebudlelwaneni be-narcissistic, umuntu othintekayo angase azibe imizwa efana nokudabuka, intukuthelo, noma ukukhungatheka ukuze agcine isithombe esihle sobudlelwano. Lokhu kungaholela ohlotsheni lobuze obungokomzwelo.

3. Ukuphika ngokucabangela

I-Rationalization iwuhlobo olucashile lokuphika. Kubandakanya ukuthola izizathu ezinengqondo zokuziphatha noma izimo ezingamukeleki. Isibonelo, umuntu angase alinganisele ukuziphatha okunobuthi ngokuzitshela ukuthi “ubudlelwano busebenza kanjalo.”

Kungani ukuphika kuqhubeka ebuhlotsheni obunobuthi?

Ukuphika kutholakala ikakhulukazi ebudlelwaneni obunobuthi, ikakhulukazi obunama-narcissistic. Izizathu zokuthi kungani ziphikelela ziningi futhi ziyinkimbinkimbi.

1. Ithonya lendawo yomphakathi

Abantu abazungezwe ubudlelwano obufanayo noma indawo lapho ukuziphatha okuhlukumezayo kujwayeleke khona bangase babe nobunzima bokubona ubuthi. Uma ukuhlukumeza kuyinhlalayenza emphakathini noma emndenini, kuba nzima ukubona ubuthi kanye nokubona izimpawu zokukhohlisa noma ukuhlukumeza.

2. Ukugcinwa kwesimo esikhona njengamanje

Abanye abantu bakhetha ukungabhekane namaqiniso ukuze balondoloze ukubonakala kokuthula nokuzinza. Ukuphika-ke kuyindlela yokulondoloza ukunethezeka okungamanga. Isibonelo, ebuhlotsheni, umuntu angase azitshele ukuthi konke kuhamba kahle ukugwema ukungqubuzana.

3. Ukungazi ngokuziphatha kwe-narcissistic

Kwezinye izimo, abantu abawazi umqondo we-narcissism noma izimpawu zokuziphatha okunobuthi. Lokhu kuyiqiniso ikakhulukazi ezilungiselelweni lapho lezi zihloko zingavamile ukuxoxwa ngazo, okwenza kube nzima ukuhlonza ukuziphatha okukhohlisayo.

Ukuphika kanye ne-cognitive dissonance

Ukwenqaba kuvame ukuhlotshaniswa i-cognitive dissonanceIsimo sokucindezeleka kwangaphakathi okudalwa yimicabango noma ukuziphatha okuphikisanayo. Isibonelo, umuntu angaba nomfanekiso womndeni ophelele, kodwa aqaphele ukuthi iqiniso lihlukile kakhulu. Lokhu kuphikisana kudala umuzwa wokungakhululeki abazama ukuwunciphisa ngokuphika.

Kumongo wobudlelwano be-narcissistic, lokhu kungaboni ngasolinye kungazibonakalisa emishwaneni efana nokuthi “Yonke into ihamba kahle” noma “Bunjalo nje ubudlelwano.” Lokhu kuvumela umuntu ukuba anciphise ukungakhululeki okubangelwa isimo sangempela futhi agcine isithombe sokujwayelekile.

Izibonelo eziqinile zokuphika ebudlelwaneni be-narcissistic

Nazi ezinye izibonelo:

1-Umbono omuhle womndeni noma umbhangqwana

Isibonelo esivamile sokuphika sitholakala kumbono omuhle wobudlelwane. Umuntu angase ahlele imicimbi yomkhaya ebonakala iphelele, njengamaholide noma ukudla, ukuze aveze isithombe senjabulo. Nokho, ngemuva kwezigcawu, ukungezwani nokungakhululeki kuyaqhubeka. Le facade iyagcinwa ukuze kulondolozwe isithombe esithile sempumelelo nenjabulo yomkhaya.

2-Izikhathi zokudideka nokungakhululeki

Ebudlelwaneni obusekelwe ekuphikeni, umuntu othintekayo uvame ukungena ezikhathini zokungabaza, ezibuza ukuthi kukhona yini okungalungile. Nokho, uyayibekela eceleni le micabango ukuze agweme ukungabaza ubudlelwano. Lesi simo siholela “ezinkingeni zokuzethemba” lapho umuntu ezama ukuqonda ukuthi yini engalungile kodwa aphinde aphike.

3-Abathonya kanye nobudlelwano bangaphandle

Abantu abasebudlelwaneni obuphikayo bangase baphendukele kubangane noma abathandekayo ukuze baqinisekise imibono yabo. Nokho, ngisho nalapho bewanikeza amaqiniso noma izincazelo ezifanele, angase azenqabe ukuze angangabazi ubuhlobo bawo.

Imiphumela yokuphika

Imiphumela yokuphika ingaba ijulile futhi ihlale isikhathi eside, ikakhulukazi ebudlelwaneni be-narcissistic:

• Ukulahlekelwa ukuzethemba : Umuntu olokhu ephika angase abe nokuzethemba okuphansi ngenxa yokuhlukunyezwa nokuntuleka kokuqinisekiswa.
• Ukuzihlukanisa ngokomzwelo : Ngokwenqaba ukubona iqiniso, ngokuvamile ugcina esezivalele.
• Ukucindezeleka Nokukhathazeka : Ukucindezeleka okubangelwa ukungezwani phakathi kweqiniso nesithombe esikahle kungaholela ekuphazamisekeni kwemizwelo.

Indima yesiko namagugu ekwenqabeni

Ukuphika kuvame ukuqiniswa yimikhuba yamasiko. Kweminye imiphakathi, ubudlelwano bomndeni kanye nabashadikazi bulungiswa kuze kube seqophelweni lapho kuba yinto engafanele ukuvuma inkinga. Ngakho, abantu ngabanye bangase bazizwe bephoqelekile ukuba bafihle iqiniso ukuze balondoloze isithombe somkhaya wabo noma ubuhlobo babo.

Izindinganiso zomphakathi nazo zithonya ukwenqaba. Amanye amasiko ayazisa nokuqinisela kanye nokwethembeka emndenini, ngisho noma kungalimaza ukuhlupheka komuntu siqu. Lesi simo senhlalo singadala indawo lapho ukuphika kungaba yinto engenzeka khona kuphela kodwa kukhuthazwa.

Ireferensi ye-Bibliographic yokuqonda izindlela zokuphika

Nazi izikhombo zezincwadi eziyisikhombisa zesiFulentshi, ikakhulukazi ezesayensi, endikimbeni yokuphika:

1. Freud, Sigmund. Ukuphika . 1925. 
2. Bergeret, Jean. Ubuntu obujwayelekile kanye ne-pathological . Dunod, 1974. 
3. Green, André. Umsebenzi we-negative . Midnight Editions, 1993. 
4. Racamier, uPaul-Claude. Ingcweti yasekuqaleni . I-Payot, ngo-1992. 
5. Laplanche, Jean, and Pontalis, Jean-Bertrand. Isilulumagama se-psychoanalysis . I-PUF, 1967. 
6. Mijolla, Alain de. Isichazamazwi samazwe ngamazwe se-Psychoanalysis . UCalmann-Lévy, ngo-2002. 
7. I-Cairn.info. Ukuphika, insiza edingekayo . InfoKara, 2005.

Lezi zithenjwa zinikeza umbono ojulile ngomqondo wokuphika ku-psychology kanye ne-psychoanalysis.

Isiphetho: I-facade of normality ngezindleko zakho

Ukuphika kuyindlela yokuzivikela enamandla evumela abantu abaningi ukuthi babhekane nezimo ezishubile ngokomzwelo. Nakuba ivikela okwesikhashana, le nqubo ingaholela ekuwohlokeni okujulile kokuzethemba kanye nokuphazamiseka kwengqondo esikhathini eside. Ebudlelwaneni be-narcissistic, ukuphika kuba ingaphambili lokujwayelekile lapho abantu bezama ukulondoloza injabulo engelona iqiniso.

Ukuze uphume ekuphikeni, kuyadingeka ukuqaphela iqiniso, nakuba lokhu kungase kube buhlungu futhi kuyinkimbinkimbi. Ukuqonda umqondo wokuphika kusho ukuqaphela ubunzima kodwa nesidingo sokubhekana namaqiniso angakhululekile ezimpilweni zethu.