I-pn nomzimba wakhe kuxhunywe ngaphakathi ku-dynamics eyinkimbinkimbi yobudlelwane obunobuthi. Nokho, ngezinye izikhathi umzimba wakhe ungakhaphela izinhloso zakhe zangempela. Kulesi sihloko, sizohlola izimpawu zomzimba kanye nolimi lomzimba lomuntu ophendukezela i-narcissistic, ukukusiza ukuthi uzibone futhi uzivikele kuzo. Ukuqonda ukuthi umuntu ohlanekezela ama-narcissistic usebenzisa kanjani umzimba wakhe kungaba ithuluzi elibalulekile kwabesifazane abayizisulu zalolu hlobo lokuxhashazwa okunobuthi.
Amehlo: amafasitela emphefumulweni ohlukumezekile
Amehlo e-narcissistic pervert avame ukuchazwa njengamangalisa ekuqaleni. Nokho, ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, lokhu kubukeka okukhangayo ekuqaleni kungase kuphazamise. Izisulu eziningi zibika ukuthi zibonile:
- Ukubukeka okungenalutho noma okudangele, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi umbala wamehlo osebenzayo inhloli isisulu
- Amehlo abonakala ephenduka abe mnyama ngesikhathi esishubile
- Umfundi obonakala encipha, eveza okumhlophe okuningi
- Ukubheka okugxilile, okuqhubekayo, okusetshenziselwa ukwesabisa noma ukubusa
Lezi zinguquko ekubukeni zingase ziphazamise ikakhulukazi futhi zivame ukuchazwa ngokuthi “amehlo amademoni” noma “amehlo kashaka.” Lolu shintsho olubonakalayo luwuphawu olubalulekile oluyisixwayiso okungafanele lushaywe indiva.
UCristina unikeza iseshini yomuntu ngamunye ukukusiza uphume ekulawulweni okuhlukumezayo futhi wakhe impilo yakho kabusha.
Ukumamatheka: imaski eqhephukayo
Ukumamatheka komuntu ohlanekezelwe yi-narcissistic iyithuluzi elesabekayo lokukhohlisa. Kungathatha izinhlobo ezahlukene, zonke ziveza ngokulinganayo:
- Ukumamatheka okuyihaba, okusikhumbuza i-Cheshire Cat e-Alice e-Wonderland
- I-grimace esheshayo noma i-grin evela ngezikhathi ezingafanelekile
- Ukumamatheka okubonakala kusakazeka ngokungafaniyo ebusweni
Lezi zimo zobuso zingaphazamisa ikakhulukazi, ikakhulukazi lapho zenzeka ngezikhathi zokucindezeleka ngokomzwelo kulowo ohlukunyeziwe. Bavame ukuveza ubumnandi obungenampilo obutholwa yi-narcissistic ekuhluphekeni kwabanye.
Ukuhleka: ukuqhuma kwenjabulo yamanga
Ukuhleka kwe-narcissistic pervert kuvame ukuchazwa njengokuphoqelelwa kanye nethiyetha. Ibonakala ngokuthi:
- Ukuqhuma okungazelelwe nokungalingani
- Ukuhleka okubonakala kuhloselwe ukuheha ukunaka kunokuveza injabulo yangempela
- Isenzo esiyihaba, njengokujikijela ikhanda lakho emuva
Lokhu kuhleka kokwenziwa kuvame ukusetshenziselwa ukubusa ingxoxo noma ukubukisa eqenjini lokuxhumana. Ingase futhi isetshenziselwe ukufihla ukungaphatheki kahle noma ukuphambukisa ukunaka esihlokweni esibangela amahloni ku-narcissistic pervert.
Isimo: ukuzikhukhumeza okufakwe enyameni
Ukuma kwe-narcissistic pervert kuvame ukuveza umuzwa wakhe wokuba mkhulu. Sivame ukubheka:
- Ukuhamba ngokuzidla, isifuba esiyindilinga
- Ukuma okuqondile nokuqinile
- Ukuthambekela kokuma ukuze abonakale emude kunobude bangempela bomuntu
Lesi simo sengqondo esingokomzimba sibonisa isidingo sabo esiqhubekayo sokubusa nokudelela kwabo abanye. Kungase kwethuse ikakhulukazi izisulu zabo.
Ubuso: ukuhlanekezela okwesabekayo
Esinye sezici eziphazamisa kakhulu zolimi lomzimba womuntu onama-narcissistic ukuhlanekezeka kobuso okungenzeka ngezikhathi zokucasuka noma ukungqubuzana okukhulu. Izisulu zivame ukuchaza:
- Umuzwa wokuthi izici zobuso ziyahlaneka
- Amehlo abonakala enyakaza noma eshintsha indawo
- Ukushintsha kwesakhiwo samathambo sobuso, ikakhulukazi emhlathini
Lokhu kuhlanekezela, nakuba kucatshangwa ngokuzimele, kubikwa njalo futhi kungase kuhlukumeze kakhulu izisulu. Ifanekisela ukudalulwa kwemvelo yangempela ye-narcissistic pervert, ngokuvamile efihliwe ngemuva kwe-mask of normality.
Izwi: i-sonic chameleon
Izwi le-narcissistic pervert liyithuluzi elicashile kodwa elinamandla lokukhohlisa. Sivame ukuqaphela:
- Ikhono lokuguqula iphimbo lomuntu ukuze alingise lowo okhuluma naye
- Izwi liyashintsha kuye ngesimo senhlalo, iphimbo evumelanayo nesilulumagama
- Ukuthambekela kokusebenzisa izinkulumo ezifanayo njengesisulu somuntu ukudala umuzwa ongamanga wokuxhumana
Lokhu kuguquguquka kwezwi kuyindlela yokuthi umphendukezeli we-narcissistic adale inkohliso yokusondelana nokuqondana, ngaleyo ndlela aqinise ukubamba kwakhe isisulu sakhe.
Ukubhekisisa: ukufuna ubuthakathaka bakho
Umphendukezeli we-narcissistic unendlela ethile yokubuka isisulu sakhe, ikakhulukazi phakathi nezingxabano noma ukugxekwa:
- Ukubuka okujulile okungathi kuskena ubuso bomunye
- Ukunakwa okukhethekile okukhokhwa emibhalweni emincane yobuhlungu noma yokungakhululeki
- Ukubuka isikhathi eside okuhloswe ukuhlonza amaphuzu abucayi
Lokhu kuhlola kuyisu lokuhlonza ukukhubazeka okungokomzwelo kwesisulu, okuvumela umuntu ohlanekezela i-narcissistic ukuthi enze ngcono ukuhlasela kwakhe kwengqondo okuzayo.
Izinkomba ze-bibliographic mayelana ne-narcissistic pervert kanye nomzimba wakhe
Nalu uhlu lwezikhombo zebhayibhili eziyi-7 zokunquma izimpawu ezibonakalayo ze-narcissistic pervert:
- “Ama-narcissistic perverts” nguJean-Charles Bouchoux (2010).
- “Ukuhlukunyezwa: Ubudlova obuhlanekezelwe ekuphileni kwansuku zonke” nguMarie-France Hirigoyen (1998).
- “I ukuxhashazwa ngokomzwelo Ebudlelwaneni: Ukusebenzelana nomhlukumezi ozikhukhumezayo by Isabelle Nazare-Aga (2000).
- “Abakhohlisayo baphakathi kwethu” by Isabelle Nazare-Aga (1997).
- “Ulimi lomzimba” ngu-Alexander Lowen (1971).
- “Umzimba we-narcissistic pervert: phakathi kwe-idealization kanye ne-instrumentalization” nguDkt. Gérard Bonnet, eshicilelwe ku Ijenali yesiFulentshi yePsychoanalysis (2005).
- “Ukuhlanekezelwa kweNarcissistic nokuhlupheka: ukuphika konke ukuphila ngokwakho, kwabanye” nguCatherine Calonne (2018).
Lezi zithenjwa kufanele zikunikeze isisekelo esiqinile sokuqonda ubudlelwano phakathi kwabahlanekezeli be-narcissistic nemizimba yabo, kanye nokuziphatha kwabo ngokujwayelekile.
I-narcissistic pervert kanye nomzimba wakhe: Isiphetho
Ukuqonda ukuthi i-narcissistic pervert iwusebenzisa kanjani umzimba wayo kubalulekile kwabesifazane abalimala yalolu hlobo lokukhohlisa. Lezi zimpawu ezibonakalayo, nakuba ngezinye izikhathi zicashile, zingaba izinkomba eziyisixwayiso ezibalulekile. Kubalulekile ukwethemba umuzwa wakho wemvelo futhi uthathe ngokungathi sína ukungakhululeki okuzwayo mayelana nalokhu kuziphatha.
Ukubona lezi zimpawu akusho ukuthi unesibopho sokuziphatha kwe-narcissistic, kodwa kungakusiza ukuthi uzivikele futhi uqaphele ubuqiniso besimo. Uma uzazi kulezi zincazelo, ungangabazi ukufuna usizo kochwepheshe noma izinhlangano ezikhethekile.
Khumbula ukuthi ufanelwe ubuhlobo obunempilo nobuhloniphekile. Ulimi lomzimba womuntu onama-narcissistic luyingxenye eyodwa kuphela yokuziphatha kwakhe okunobuthi, kodwa ukukuqaphela kungaba isinyathelo sokuqala ekukhululweni nasekuphulukisweni.
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