Usabela kanjani umuntu onama-narcissist lapho ekhashelwa?

La nasiphambeko Kuyisipiliyoni esibuhlungu, kodwa umuntu othanda ukuzikhukhumeza usabela kanjani ekukhashelweni? Lapho umuntu othanda ukuzikhukhumeza ekhashelwa, ukusabela kwakhe kungaba nzima, kuqhume, futhi kungalindeleki. Ngokungafani nabantu abanempilo enhle ngokomzwelo, abangakuzwa ubuhlungu, bavume, bese beqhubeka, umuntu othanda ukuzikhukhumeza uguqula lobo buhlungu bube yintukuthelo. Lesi sihloko sihlola ukuziphatha komuntu othanda ukuzikhukhumeza olimele ngokukhashelwa kanye nezizathu ezenza lo muzwa ubangele ukusabela okunamandla kangaka kuye.

Kusho ukuthini ukukhaphela kumuntu oyisidina?

Ukuze uqonde ukusabela kwe-narcissist ekukhapheni, kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuthi kusho ukuthini ukukhaphela kubo.

• Ukubaluleka kwe-ego : Ku-narcissist, i-ego ithatha indawo eyinhloko kubo bonke ubudlelwano bakhe. Ukushaywa okuncane kwalokhu kuziphatha kubonakala njengokuhlasela okuqondile kumuntu wabo.
• Ukulindela ukwethembeka okungenamibandela : AmaNarcissists alindele ukwethembeka okungantengantengi kulabo ababazungezile, nakuba bona ngokwabo bengakwephula lokho kwethembeka ngaphandle kokuzisola.
• Ingozi yokuchayeka ekungavikelekeni : Ukukhaphela kwenza ukungavikeleki kwabo okujulile kusebenze, okwenza isimo singabekezeleleki kubo.

Izigaba Zomzwelo Ze-Narcissist Ekhashiwe

Lapho i-narcissist ikhashelwa, ukusabela kwabo ngokomzwelo kuvame ukuhamba ngezigaba eziningana ezihlukene:

1. Ubuhlungu nokuba sengozini

Ekuqaleni, ukukhaphela kubangela ukuthi i-narcissist azizwe esengozini, umzwelo ongakhululekile kubo. Lo muzwa wobuhlungu ungaba isikhashana kodwa ushube.

2. Ukulimala kweNarcissistic kanye nentukuthelo

Ngokushesha, lobu buhlungu buphenduka ukulimala kwe-narcissistic. Kunokuba ubhekane nalomzwelo ngendlela eyakhayo, uphenduka intukuthelo. Ukusabela kwabo ngokuvamile akulingani.

3. Ukuziphindiselela kanye nesidingo sokulawula

Intukuthelo ithatha indawo yesidingo sokuziphindiselela. I-narcissist izofuna ukujezisa umuntu owamkhaphela, ngezinye izikhathi ngonya futhi ngokuphindaphindiwe, ngoba isenzo sokukhaphela simelela ukudelela amandla nokulawula kwabo.

Ukusabela Okujwayelekile Kwe-Narcissist Ekhashiwe

Ukuziphatha kwe-narcissist lapho ebhekene nokukhashelwa kungahluka, kodwa okunye kuyaphindaphinda futhi kubonisa ubunzima balaba bantu ukuze banqobe lolu hlobo lokulimala.

• Intukuthelo Eqhumayo : Ukuthukuthela kungaba ngokushesha futhi kube nobudlova, okuphawulwa ukuqhuma kwentukuthelo, ukuthuka noma izinsongo.
• Imikhankaso ye-smear : Umxolisi angase aqale amahlebezi, ahlaselwe ngamazwi, noma abhale ezinkundleni zokuxhumana ukuze adicilele phansi igama lomuntu.
• Ukuthula nokuhoxa : Amanye ama-narcisists aphendula ngokubanda okujezisayo nangokuthula.
• Isimo sengqondo sesisulu : Ukuze bahehe uzwelo, bangase bazibeke njengezisulu kulabo ababazungezile.
• Ukuzihlukanisa nabanye : Bazofuna ukuqhelelanisa labo abasondelene nomuntu obakhaphele, bakhulise ukusola nokungathembani eduze kwabo.

Kungani i-narcissist iguqula ukukhaphela kube yintukuthelo?

Le ntukuthelo enamandla ingase ibonakale ingenakulinganiswa, kodwa ingachazwa ngezizathu eziningana:

• I-ego ebuthakathaka : Ukukhaphela kubangela ukulimala kwe-ego, umuzwa ongabekezeleleki ku-narcissist.
• Ukwesaba okujulile Ngemuva kwentukuthelo, kuvame ukuba nokwesaba ukulahlwa nesizungu.
• Ukulahlekelwa ukulawula : Kubo, ukulawula abanye kuyindlela yokugcina isithombe sabo samandla. Ukukhaphela kubabeka esimweni sokulahlekelwa ukuzilawula abangenakukuthwala.
• Ukwenqaba ukuzihlola : Ngokuvamile, bagwema noma yikuphi ukuzihlola. Ukukhaphela kungabaphoqa ukuba bazibuze, into abenqaba ngokuphelele ukuyenza.

Kungenzeka yini ukulungisa ubudlelwano ngemva kokukhaphela?

Ebudlelwaneni obunempilo, ukukhaphela ngezinye izikhathi kungaholela engxoxweni nasekulungiseni. Nge-narcissist, lokhu akuvamile ukuba kwenzeke:

• Ukuntuleka kokuvumelana ngokomzwelo : Ubudlelwano be-narcissistic abunayo uzwela nokuqonda.
• Izindlela zokuzivikela eziqinile : Babheka ukukhaphela njengokungathetheleleki, ikakhulukazi uma kuthinta isithombe sabo noma ubuyena.
• Ukuphindwa kwezingxabano : Ubudlelwano ne-narcissist busheshe bube nobuthi, njengoba bevame ukubamba amagqubu unomphela.

Kungani ukukhaphela kucishe kungenakugwenywa ebudlelwaneni nomuntu onama-narcissist?

Ngenxa yobuntu babo, ubudlelwano nama-narcissists buvame ukuba nzima futhi abugculisi, buholele, ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, ezenzweni ezibonwa njengokukhaphela. Ozakwethu, abangani, noma amalungu omndeni ngezinye izikhathi bafuna ukunakwa ukuze bagweme ukungqubuzana, kodwa ukukhaphela cishe kucishe kugwemeke kulo mongo.

Izinkomba ze-bibliographic mayelana nokusabela kwe-narcissist ekukhapheni

Nalu uhlu lwezikhombo eziyisikhombisa ze-bibliographic:

1. Millon, T., & Davis, R. (1996). Ukuphazamiseka Kobuntu Empilweni Yanamuhla . ENew York: UJohn Wiley & Sons.
2. UKernberg, O.F. (1975). Izimo ze-Borderline kanye ne-Pathological Narcissism . ENew York: UJason Aronson.
3. U-Akhtar, S. (2009). I-Shattered Self: Ucwaningo lwe-Psychoanalytic of Trauma . I-London: Routledge.
4. UCampbell, W. K., & Baumeister, R. F. (2001). “Ingabe I-Narcissism Imbi Kangaka?” » Uphenyo Lwezengqondo , 12 (3), 214-216.
5. Greenberg, J., & Mitchell, S. (1983). Ubudlelwano Bento ku-Psychoanalytic Theory . I-Cambridge: I-Harvard University Press.
6. Masterson, JF (1981). I-Narcissistic kanye ne-Borderline Disorders . ENew York: Brunner/Mazel.
7. Milon, T., Grossman, S., Millon, C., Meagher, S., & Ramnath, R. (2004). Ukuphazamiseka Kobuntu Empilweni Yanamuhla , Uhlelo lwesi-2. ENew York: UJohn Wiley & Sons.

Isiphetho

Ukukhaphela i-narcissist, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ngengozi noma ngokuzivikela, kungaholela ekuphenduleni kokuqhuma. Lolu hlobo lobuntu, oluzicabangela lona futhi alukwazi ukuzihlola, lushiya isikhala esincane sokulungisa noma ukuvela kobudlelwano. Uma i-narcissist izwa sengathi ikhashelwe, iqala uchungechunge lokusabela okusukela entukuthelweni kuya esidingweni sokuziphindiselela. Ubudlelwano nama-narcissists ngokuvamile budinga imingcele ecacile futhi, kwezinye izimo, ibanga ukuze kugwenywe umjikelezo wokungqubuzana nobuthi.