I-Electra’s complex: Ukuqonda lesi sibopho esiyinkimbinkimbi sendodakazi nendodakazi

Le Electra complex umqondo wokuhlaziya ingqondo ochaza ukunamathela ngokweqile kwendodakazi kuyise, okuvame ukuhambisana nokuncintisana okungazelelwe nonina. Leli gama, elithathwe ezinganekwaneni zamaGreki, lathandwa nguCarl Jung, yize elilingana naleli gama labesilisa, I-Oedipus complex, noma eyaziwa kabanzi. Electra complex igqamisa ukuguquguquka komndeni okujulile kanye nezici ezibalulekile zokuthuthukiswa kwengqondo yamantombazane.

Kulesi sihloko, sizohlola imvelaphi, ukubonakaliswa kanye nomsebenzi wabacwaningi abaye bafunda lesi simo. Sizogxila emthelela wengqondo we Electra complex ekuphileni kowesifazane, kanye nethonya layo elihlala njalo ekubeni umuntu omdala.

Iyini i-Electra complex?

Le Electra complex ibhekisela ekusondeleni kwendodakazi okujulile, nokungazi lutho ngokomzwelo noyise, kuhlanganiswe nohlobo oluthile lokubangisana nomama. Leli gama lisuka enganekwaneni yamaGreki ka-Electra, indodakazi yeNkosi u-Agamemnon noClytemnestra, ophindisela ukufa kukayise ngokubulala unina. Le nganekwane ifanekisela ukushuba kwesibopho sobaba nendodakazi kanye nobunkimbinkimbi bobudlelwane phakathi komndeni.

UCristina unikeza iseshini yomuntu ngamunye ukukusiza uphume ekulawulweni okuhlukumezayo futhi wakhe impilo yakho kabusha.

UCarl Jung, isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo saseSwitzerland, wethula leli gama ngokuphendula I-Oedipus complex kaFreud, kodwa ukusisebenzisa kumantombazane. Ngokungafani noFreud, owayekholelwa ukuthi inkimbinkimbi ye-Oedipali ingasebenza kubo bobabili amantombazane nabafana, uJung wacabanga ukuthi kubalulekile ukuhlukanisa ukuthuthukiswa kwengqondo kobulili obubili.

Indima kababa ku-Electra complex

e Electra complex, ubaba uthatha indawo eyinhloko engqondweni yendodakazi. Uvame ukubonakala njengomuntu onegunya nothando, futhi lokhu kuguquguquka kungaguqukela ekucabangeni okudlulele kukababa. Lokhu kulungiswa kungaba nemiphumela embalwa:

  1. Isidingo sokugunyazwa : Indodakazi ingase ibe nesifiso esingapheli sokuqashelwa nothando lukayise, ifune ukuqinisekisa uthando lwayo, ngisho nalapho isikhulile.
  2. Ukukhangwa izibalo zesilisa ezifanayo : Isithombe sikababa siba yisibonelo sobudlelwano bothando obulandelayo, owesifazane evame ukufuna amadoda ahlanganisa izimfanelo ezibonwa uyise.
  3. Ukuncika ngokomzwelo : Lobu budlelwano obuqinile nobaba bungaholela ohlotsheni lokuncika ngokomzwelo kubantu besilisa empilweni yabantu abadala.

Lapho lesi sibopho nobaba singalinganiseli noma singekho, singadala ukuntula ngokomzwelo, okuholela emiphumeleni ebudlelwaneni bothando besikhathi esizayo. Ukufuna njalo izibalo zobaba kubalingani bothando kungase kubangele a I-Electra syndrome okungaxazululiwe.

Ukubangisana nomama

Le Electra complex ngokuvamile kuhlanganisa umuzwa wokubangisana nomama, njengoba indodakazi ibheka unina njengomuntu oqhudelana naye ngothando lukayise. Lo muzwa wokuncintisana uvamise ukungazi lutho, kodwa ungaziveza ngezindlela ezahlukene ku-dynamics yomndeni:

  1. Umona kumama : Indodakazi ingase ibe nesikhwele esicashile ngonina, ikakhulukazi esimeni sobudlelwane bomshado phakathi kwabazali bayo.
  2. Ukungqubuzana kwezizukulwane : Lo muzwa wokubangisana ungase ubangele izingxabano phakathi kukamama nendodakazi, kuphazamise ubuhlobo bomkhaya ngokuhamba kwesikhathi.

Njengoba intombazane ikhula, ingase icindezele le mizwa noma iqhubeke nokubhekana nalokhu kuqhudelana ngezinye izinhlobo, njengobunzima bokwakha ubuhlobo obuqinile besifazane. Kunokuba ikhawulelwe ebuntwaneni, lokhu kungqubuzana kungazibonakalisa lapho umuntu esekhulile, abe nomthelela ekuhlanganyeleni nabanye besifazane esimweni somsebenzi noma senhlalo.

Ukubonakaliswa kwe-Electra complex lapho usumdala

Le Electra complex, lapho ingaxazululeki, ingaphumela ekubonakaleni okuningana lapho usumdala, ikakhulukazi ebuhlotsheni bomuntu siqu nobothando.

  • Ubunzima bokusungula ubudlelwano obuvumelanayo nabesifazane
  • Ukukhangwa abantu besilisa abanegunya – Abesifazane abaye babhekana Electra complex okungaxazululiwe kungakhangwa ngokungazi amadoda anegunya noma anamandla akhumbula isithombe esihle sikababa. Lokhu kuguquguquka kungaholela ebudlelwaneni obungenakulinganisela lapho owesifazane ehlala efuna ukugunyazwa kumlingani wakhe wesilisa.
  • Ukuncika ngokomzwelo kanye nesidingo sokuqinisekiswa – Omunye umphumela ovamile ukuncika ngokomzwelo emadodeni, okubonakala njengesidingo esiqhubekayo sokuqinisekiswa nothando. Lokhu kwencika kungaba yisithiyo ebudlelwaneni bothando, ngoba kudala ukungalingani ngokomzwelo lapho omunye umuntu ehlala efuna ukuqashelwa.

Ubunzima bokusungula ubudlelwano obuvumelanayo nabesifazane

La ubunzima bokusungula ubudlelwano obuvumelanayo nabesifazane kuwumphumela ovamile we Electra complex okungakaxazululwa, lapho umbango wokuqala phakathi kwentombazane nomama wayo udlala indima ebalulekile. Ebuntwaneni, lo mbango uzibonakalisa njengomncintiswano ongenalwazi wokunakwa nothando lukababa. Indodakazi, ibona unina njengomuntu oqhudelana naye ngothando lukababa, ingase ibe nomuzwa womhawu noma wokungamethembi. Njengoba ingane ikhula, le phethini yokuncintisana ayigcini nje ngokuphikelela, kodwa ingaphinde ibonakale kwabanye besifazane ezimweni ezehlukene, ngaleyo ndlela ithinte ikhono lokwakha ubudlelwano besifazane obunempilo nobunokulinganisela.

Ukuthembela nokungathembani ebudlelwaneni babantu besifazane

Okunye kokubonakaliswa kokuqala kwalokhu okuguquguqukayo yi- ubunzima bokuthemba abanye abantu besifazane. Imodeli yokuncintisana kanye nokubangisana nomama ingaba igridi yokufunda equlekile lapho owesifazane abona khona ubudlelwano bakhe nabanye abantu besifazane. Ebunganeni noma ebudlelwaneni bomsebenzi, owesifazane angase akhiqize kabusha le phethini yokuqhudelana ngokungazi, abone abanye besifazane njengabangase babe izitha, ikakhulukazi uma kuziwa ezindabeni ezihlobene nokuvunyelwa kwabesilisa noma intshisekelo. Lokhu kungathembani kungaholela ekungakwazini ukwakha ukuxhumana okujulile, kwangempela nabanye besifazane, ngoba konke ukusebenzelana kwabesifazane kuhlanganiswe ukwesaba ukuncintisana noma ukukhashelwa.

Lokhu kungathembani kuvame ukuholela ekuntulekeni kobumbano lwabesifazane. Kunokuba babone abanye besifazane njengabangane noma abalingani, babonakala njengezimbangi, okungadala ibanga elibalulekile elingokomzwelo. Ubungane besifazane ngokuvamile busuke bukha phezulu noma busekelwe emibangweni yezikhundla, owesifazane ehlale esaba ukuphushelwa eceleni noma ukukhashelwa.

Ukuthambekela kokuncintisana kwabesifazane

Esinye isici esibalulekile yi- ukuthambekela kokuncintisana nabanye abantu besifazane, ikakhulukazi uma kuziwa ekunakeni noma ekugunyazweni kwabesilisa. I-Electra complex isiholela ekufakeni ngaphakathi uhlobo lokuncintisana njalo nesibalo sikamama, futhi lo mncintiswano ube usujwayeleke ebudaleni nabanye besifazane. Ebudlelwaneni bothando, isibonelo, owesifazane one- I-Electra syndrome ukungaxazululeki kungase kuzizwe kusongelwa ngokushesha nje lapho omunye wesifazane ebonisa isithakazelo endodeni efanayo naye.

Lesi sidingo sokugqama, ukwedlula abanye abantu besifazane, singaba ngobuqili noma, kwezinye izimo, siphikisane kakhulu ngokwedlulele. Lokhu kungaholela ekutheni a ukuziphatha kokuncintisana emikhakheni ehlukene: hhayi kuphela ebudlelwaneni bezothando, kodwa nasendaweni yezobuchwepheshe, lapho ozakwabo besifazane bengabonakala njengabancintisana nabo ukuze baqedwe kunokuba njengabalingani bomsebenzi abazosebenzisana nabo.

Ukuncintisana kwabesifazane kungase futhi kubonakale njengesifiso esiqhubekayo sokuziqhathanisa nabanye besifazane, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ubukeka kanjani, isimo senhlalo, noma impumelelo yomuntu siqu. Lesi sidingo esingapheli sokuqhathanisa singabhebhethekisa imizwa yokungazethembi kanye nokunganeliseki, kuqinise ukuncintisana kanye nokuqhelelana nabanye besifazane. Owesifazane ube esefuna ukuqinisekiswa kwangaphandle, ngokuvamile ngezibalo zabesilisa, ukuze aqinisekise ukubaluleka kwakhe, futhi lokhu kufuna ukuqashelwa kwabesilisa kungaqinisa umqondo wokuthi abanye besifazane bayizithiyo ekufezeni kwakhe siqu.

Ukukhiqizwa kabusha kwe-schema yendodakazi kamama kwezinye izimo

Omunye wemiphumela eyingozi kakhulu Electra complex ukukhiqizwa kwe indlela yokungqubuzana kukamama nendodakazi kobunye ubudlelwano besifazane. Owesifazane owabhekana nalokhu kubangisana okushubile nomama wakhe angase afune ukuphinda enze le phethini ebudlelwaneni bakhe bakamuva nabanye abaphethe besifazane, njengabaphathi noma abeluleki. Isibonelo, angase abe nobunzima bokwamukela igunya lomuntu wesifazane emsebenzini noma endaweni yomphakathi, ebona uhlobo ngalunye lobuholi besifazane njengokwakheka okusha komuntu wesifazane okufanele alwe naye.

Le ndlela yokuphindaphinda ayimi kuphela ezibalweni zeziphathimandla. Ngisho nasebunganeni, abesifazane bangaba nemizwa engqubuzanayo, engqubuzana phakathi kothando nokubangisana. Isifiso sokusondelana nomngane singase sithiywe uvalo olungazi lutho lokuphinda uqhudelane ngokomzwelo nomama. Ngenxa yalokho, ubuhlobo besifazane buyantengantenga, bubonakala ngokuhlukana noma ukungezwani njalo.

Ukuzihlukanisa ngokomzwelo

Ekugcineni, ubunzima bokusungula ubudlelwano obuvumelanayo nabesifazane kungaholela ekutheni a ukuzihlukanisa ngokomzwelo okuqhubekayo. Owesifazane ozizwa eqhudelana njalo nabanye besifazane, noma obabheka njengabangase abe izimbangi, angakhetha ukunciphisa ukusebenzisana kwakhe nabo. Lokhu kuhoxiswa komphakathi kudala umjikelezo ononya, lapho ukuzihlukanisa kuqinisa izinkolelo eziyisisekelo zokungathembani nokubangisana, kuvimbela ukudalwa kobudlelwano obuyiqiniso nobukhulisayo.

Ukwengeza, lokhu kuzihlukanisa kungase kuvimbele owesifazane ekujabuleleni izinzuzo zobumbano besifazane, isici esibalulekile ekunikezeni ukusekelwa ngokomzwelo nokwakha izinkundla zokuxhumana ezinempilo. Ngokuziqhelelanisa nabanye besifazane, uzincisha ukusekelwa okubalulekile, okungandisa imizwa yesizungu nokuba sengozini yomzwelo. Lokhu kunomthelela ekwenzeni kube nzima kakhulu ukuxazulula izingxabano zangaphakathi ezixhumene nakho Electra complex, ngoba akanabo ubudlelwano obungamsiza ukuba anqobe lezi zindlela ezingokwengqondo.

Sekukonke, i ubunzima bokusungula ubudlelwano obuvumelanayo nabesifazane ingenye yezibonakaliso ezibaluleke kakhulu ze I-Electra syndrome okungaxazululiwe. Kuvela ekubangweni kokuqala nomama okuthi, uma kunganqotshwa, kudlulele kobunye ubudlelwano besifazane phakathi nokuphila kwabantu abadala. Le phethini ivame ukuholela ekuziphatheni kokungathembani, ukuncintisana kanye nokuzihlukanisa, ngaleyo ndlela kuvimbele abesifazane ekufinyeleleni ubudlelwano obunelisayo nobulinganiselayo nabanye besifazane.

Theumphumela we-Electra syndrome ebudlelwaneni namadoda

Theumphumela we-Electra syndrome ebudlelwaneni namadoda ekukhuleni bujulile futhi bungabonakala ngokushintshashintsha okuningana okungokwengqondo nengokomzwelo, okuthonya indlela owesifazane abona futhi asebenzelane ngayo nezibalo zabesilisa. Uma intombazane ingakaxazululi le ngxabano equlekile ehlobene nokunamathela kwayo kuyise, ingakha amaphethini obudlelwano angasebenzi athinta ubudlelwano bayo bezothando futhi, ngokubanzi, indlela yayo yokusondelana namadoda ngokuvamile.

Ngifuna izibalo zobaba ebudlelwaneni bothando

Omunye wemiphumela esobala kakhulu I-Electra syndrome okungaxazululeki ukuthambekela kokufuna ngokungazi izibalo zobaba kubalingani bothando. Owesifazane, njengoba efeze ubaba wakhe ebuntwaneni bakhe, ufuna ukukhiqiza lokhu okunamandla ebudlelwaneni bakhe bothando. Angase akhangwe amadoda amadala, aphethe noma avikelayo amkhumbuza uyise. Lokhu kusesha kukababa obambele kungamphusha ukuthi athande ubudlelwano lapho ezizwa evikelekile, encike noma efuna ukuqinisekiswa wesilisa.

Lokhu kungase futhi kumholele ekukhetheni ozakwethu abasebenzisa ukulawula ngokweqile noma igunya phezu kwakhe, akhiqize kabusha iphethini ye ukuzithoba kanye nokukhuliswa kwezingane. Isidingo sokuqondiswa, ukuqinisekiswa noma ukuvikelwa yindoda enamandla singakhinyabeza ukukhula komuntu siqu futhi sidale ukungalingani ebudlelwaneni. Angase afune ukulondoloza isimo esishukumisayo lapho ehlala khona “esewusana”, eshiya owesilisa endimeni yesikhulu kanye nomenzi wezinqumo, okungakhawulela ukukhula kwakhe kanye nekhono lakhe lokuziphendukela kwemvelo njengomuntu ozimele.

I-Electra Syndrome & Narcissistic kanye/noma Ubudlelwano Bobuthi

Le I-Electra syndrome, lapho ingaxazululiwe, empeleni ingaholela ekuziphatheni okuhlukumezayo. ukuzithoba futhiukubeletha ebudlelwaneni babantu abadala, ikakhulukazi ubudlelwano bothando. Lesi simo sichazwa ukunamathela okujulile ngokomzwelo nangokwengqondo intombazane eba khona ngakuyise ngesikhathi sobuntwana, futhi okuphikelelayo ekubeni umuntu omdala angazi lutho.

Ukufuna umuntu ongubaba

Enye yezinto eziguquguqukayo eziyinhloko ze I-Electra syndrome wusesho oluqulekile, kwabesifazane abadala, lobaba kubalingani babo bothando. Ngemva kokucabangela uyise njengomuntu onegunya, isivikelo namandla, owesifazane angase afune ukukhiqiza kabusha lokhu kuguquguquka ebudlelwaneni bakhe babantu abadala. Lokhu kuholela ku amaphethini okuncika lapho enikeza umlingani wakhe indima yomqondisi noma umvikeli, ebeka indoda esikhundleni samandla negunya phezu kwayo.

Lobu budlelwano be-asymmetric buphumela ohlotsheni lwe ukuzithoba, lapho owesifazane evumelana nezifiso nezinqumo zomlingani wakhe, efuna ukwamukelwa nothando lwakhe ngokubuyisela. Lokhu kuhanjiswa kungathatha izinhlobo eziningana: ukuvumelana nezinqumo zomlingani, ukuvumela izidingo zakhe, noma ukugwema izingxabano ukuze ungabi sengozini yokulahlekelwa uthando lwayo, njengoba nje nendodakazi yesaba ukulahlekelwa uthando lukayise Electra complex. Ngakho-ke owesifazane ufuna ukuqinisekisa ukunakwa nothando lomlingani wakhe ngokuzibeka endaweni yokuhlonipha, ecabanga ukuthi ngokwenza ngale ndlela, angakwazi ukugcina ukuvumelana ebuhlotsheni.

Isidingo sokuvikelwa nokuncika

Le isidingo sokuvikelwa okunye ukubonakaliswa okuvamile kwalesi syndrome. Njengengxenye ye- I-Electra syndrome, owesifazane uveza umqondo wokunakekelwa ngumuntu wesilisa ovelele, njengoba uyise ayenjalo ebuntwaneni bakhe. Ube eselindela ukuthi umlingani wakhe amvikele, amqondise, futhi amenzele izinqumo ezibalulekile, ezimbeka esimweni isikhundla somntwana. Lokhu kuguquguquka kudala ubudlelwano bamandla obungalingani, lapho owesilisa ethatha indima yokuba umzali ovikelayo, kuyilapho owesifazane ethatha isikhundla sokuncika ngokomzwelo nangokwengqondo, okufana nesengane.

Lokhu kuthungatha isivikelo kungaholela owesifazane ukuba agweme izibopho noma anikeze ngokuhlelekile izinqumo ezibalulekile kumlingani wakhe. Ingase yenqabe ukuthatha izinyathelo noma iveze imibono yayo, ikhethe ukuncika egunyeni lendoda, njengoba yenza kuyise. Lokhu kuguquguquka kokuncika kuqinisa uhlobo lweukubeletha, lapho owesifazane ezibona engakwazi ukunakekela izidingo zakhe noma ukubhekana nezinselele zempilo ngokuzimela.

Ukwesaba ukulahlwa nokuzithoba

Le I-Electra syndrome ibuye ihlotshaniswe ne-a ukwesaba ukulahlwa, okucindezela owesifazane ukuthi azithobe ukuze agweme noma iyiphi ingozi yokwaliwa. Njengoba nje ingane yesaba ukulahlekelwa uthando lukayise uma kwenzeka ingxabano noma ingxabano, owesifazane omdala angakwazi ukuziphatha ukuzithoba ngokomzwelo ukugcina uthando lomlingani wakhe. Uyakugwema ukubhekana nokungaboni ngaso linye, ukubeka imingcele, noma ukugomela ngezidingo zakhe, ngoba esaba ukuthi ukwenza kanjalo kuzobeka ubuhlobo engozini.

Le ukuxhumana phakathi kokwesaba ukulahlwa, ubudlelwano nozakwethu we-narcissistic kanye ne-Electra syndrome iyinkimbinkimbi futhi ngokuvamile igxilile ekuguquguqukeni kwengqondo yowesifazane oye wabhekana nalokhu okulandelayo. Abesifazane abathintekayo I-Electra syndrome ngokuvamile bahlakulela ukuthembela okujulile ngokomzwelo kubantu besilisa, ikakhulukazi labo abafana noyise, okubenza babe sengozini enkulu yobudlelwane nabalingani abangaba narcissistic. Ukwesaba ukulahlwa, okubangelwa ukunamathela okungavikelekile kuyise ngesikhathi sobuntwana, kungabaholela ekufuneni abalingani abathembisa ukuvikelwa nokuqinisekiswa, kodwa, empeleni, ngokuvamile abanobugovu nabakhohlisayo. Ama-Narciss, ngokwemvelo yawo, asizakala ngalokhu kwesaba ngokunikeza uthando olubonakala lungenamibandela bese enza indawo yokulawula nokwehlisa inani. Lokhu okuguquguqukayo kuqinisa ukuzithoba nokuncika kowesifazane, owathi, esaba ukulahlekelwa uthando lukazakwethu we-narcissistic, abekezelele ukuziphatha okuhlukumezayo kuyilapho ehlala ebambekile kumjikelezo wokunamathela okungenampilo. Ngakho-ke, i-Electra syndrome, ngokusebenza njenge-prism lapho owesifazane ebona futhi ezwa ubudlelwano bakhe, ikhulisa ukwesaba ukulahlwa futhi imchaye ebudlelwaneni obulimazayo obuqhubekisela phambili ukungakwazi kwakhe ukuziqinisa nokusungula ukuxhumana okunempilo nokunokulinganisela.

Ukuncika ngokomzwelo nangokomzwelo

Omunye umphumela ovamile we I-Electra syndrome iyona ukuncika ngokomzwelo. Owesifazane angahlakulela ukuncika okuqinile ngokomzwelo kumlingani wakhe, efuna njalo ukwamukelwa nothando lwakhe, ngendlela efanayo naleyo ayefuna ngayo ukunaka kukayise ebuntwaneni. Lokhu kuncika kungenza kube nzima ukusungula ubudlelwano obulinganayo, lapho bobabili abalingani belingana ekushintshaneni ngokomzwelo.

Kulobu budlelwano, owesifazane angase akhathazeke ngokujulile ngokulahlekelwa uthando noma ukunakwa umlingani wakhe, ngaleyo ndlela akhiqize ukwesaba ukulahlekelwa uthando lukayise. Angase abe namandla kakhulu, abe nomona, noma azwele kakhulu izimpawu ezincane zebanga elingokomzwelo, ezingalimaza ubuhlobo. Lesi sidingo esiqhubekayo sokuqinisekiswa singase siminyanise omunye, sidale ukuguquguquka okungalinganiseli lapho owesifazane enikela ngakho konke ukuze athole uthando, ngaphandle kokuthola ukusekelwa ngokomzwelo okufanayo.

La ukuncika ngokomzwelo futhi zidinga ukuqinisekiswa ziyizibonakaliso ezijulile ze I-Electra syndrome, ikakhulukazi phakathi kwabesifazane abaye babhekana nezinkinga zomndeni ezingqubuzanayo. Lesi sifo, esihlotshaniswa nokubangisana nomama nokunamathelana nobaba, sidala indawo evundile yokuthuthukiswa kokuncika ngokomzwelo ebuhlotsheni bothando.

Umsuka wokuncika ngokomzwelo

Kumongo we-Electra syndrome, ukuncika ngokomzwelo kuvame ukuqala kusukela ebuntwaneni. Indodakazi, ngokuncintisana nomama wayo ngothando nokunaka kukayise, iqala ukungazethembi ngokubaluleka kwayo siqu. Ufunda ukuthi uthando kufanele luzuzwe nokuthi kufanele abonise ukuthi ubalulekile, ngokuvamile ngokubhekana nokuziphatha. Lesi sidingo sokuqinisekisa sibe sesiphenduka isifiso esinamandla sokugunyazwa ebudlelwaneni obuzayo, simphusha ukuthi afune ukujabulisa abalingani bakhe ukuze azizwe ethandwa futhi emukelwa.

Ukubonakaliswa ebuhlotsheni bothando

Lokhu kwencika kuvame ukuzibonakalisa ngokuthi isidingo esiqhubekayo sokuqinisekiswa ngabesilisa. Owesifazane ohlaselwe yi-Electra syndrome angase azithole efuna izimpawu zothando, ukunconywa, noma ukuqinisekiswa kothando kumlingani wakhe ngokweqile. Ukusebenzelana ngakunye kuba yithuba lokulinganisa ukubaluleka komuntu siqu. Angase agxile emazwini nasezenzweni zomunye umuntu, efuna ukuchaza izimpawu ezingokomzwelo ukuze aqinisekise ukuthi uyathandwa. Lokhu kufuna njalo ukuqinisekiswa kungaholela ohlotsheni lokucindezeleka ngokomzwelo lapho owesifazane ezizwa esengozini, ekhathazekile futhi ngezinye izikhathi ngisho engenathemba lapho umlingani wakhe engakwazi ukuhlangabezana nalokho akulindele.

Ukungalingani ngokomzwelo

Lokhu kuguquguquka kokuncika ngokomzwelo kudala a ukungalingani ngokomzwelo ebudlelwaneni. Omunye umlingani, ngokuvamile owesifazane, uzithola esesimweni lapho ehlala efuna ukuqashelwa komunye, kuyilapho omunye engase angaqondi ukuqina kwalesi sidingo. Le-asymmetry ingaholela ekukhungathekeni okufanayo, lapho owesifazane ezizwa engelutho futhi enganeliseki ngothando alutholayo, nalapho indoda, ibona lokhu kucindezela, ingase izizwe ivalelwe ekhoneni noma icindezelwe yilokho okulindelwe umlingani wayo.

Imiphumela yesikhathi eside

Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, lesi sidingo sokuqinisekisa singaholela ukuziphatha okuzithobayo noma ukuzidela. Ukuze alondoloze uthando lomlingani wakhe, owesifazane angase ahoxise, anciphise izidingo zakhe, izifiso kanye nezifiso. Angase futhi ahlakulele ukuthambekela kokuzigxeka, lapho ehumusha khona ukunganaki noma ukuqinisekiswa njengobufakazi bokungafaneleki kwakhe. Lo mjikelezo wokuncika ungaphinda uholele ekungqubuzaneni, ekuhlukaneni noma ebudlelwaneni obungasebenzi kahle, njengoba owesifazane, ngenkathi efisa ukuzizwa ethandwa, angazithola esemaphethini obudlelwano obungalingani, ikakhulukazi nozakwethu abane-narcissistic abaxhaphazayo.

Imiphumela ekuzethembeni

Umthelela walokhu kuncika ngokomzwelo ekuzethembeni ubaluleke kakhulu. Ngokuhlala ehlobanisa umuzwa wakhe wokubaluleka nokuvunyelwa abanye, owesifazane uyasuka embonweni wokuthi ukuzethemba kwakhe kufanele kube okungaphakathi. Lokhu kudala umbuthano ononya: lapho efuna kakhulu ukuziqinisekisa ngabanye, kulapho engakwazi khona ukuthuthukisa umuzwa ozimele wobuyena. Ugcina esekhombana kakhulu nophathina wakhe, agcine engasaziboni izidingo nezifiso zakhe, okungaholela ekulahlekelweni ubuyena ebudlelwaneni.

Ukukhangwa ngamadoda angama-narcissistic noma akhohlisayo

Le I-Electra syndrome kungase futhi kubangele ukuthi abanye besifazane babe sengozini enkulu amadoda angama-narcissistic noma akhohlisayo. Isifiso sokukhiqiza kabusha indodakazi kababa-indodakazi enamandla singase simshukumisele ukuba akhethe abalingani abasebenzisa amandla angokomzwelo noma angokwengqondo phezu kwakhe, abalawula isidingo sakhe sokuthandwa nokuqinisekiswa. Indoda ye-narcissistic, efuna ukunakwa njalo futhi ekwazisa ukubaluleka kwayo, ingase ihambisane nesithombe sikababa ofanelekayo owesifazane afuna ukumanelisa ngazo zonke izindleko. Ngaleyo ndlela angazithola esebudlelwaneni obunobuthi, lapho esetshenziswa khona, elulazwa noma exhashazwa ngokomzwelo, kuyilapho ehlala enamathele ethembeni lokuthola uthando noma ukuqashelwa okubonakala kungafinyeleleki.

Ukwengeza, lobu bungozi bungahumushela ekwamukelweni kokuziphatha okulimazayo okuvela kumlingani womuntu. Owesifazane angase athethelele noma athethelele ukuziphatha okuhlukumezayo, kuyilapho efuna njalo ukuhlangabezana nokulindela komlingani wakhe, ecabanga ukuthi, ngesikhathi esithile, uzokwazi “ukuzuza” uthando lwakhe. Le phethini yobudlelwano, ithonywe yi- I-Electra syndrome, ngokuvamile kunzima ukuphuka, ngoba ufeza izidingo ezijulile ezingokomzwelo kusukela ebuntwaneni.

Ubunzima bokusungula ubudlelwano obulinganayo

Le I-Electra syndrome ingakha futhi ubunzima bokusungula ubudlelwano njengabantu abalinganayo namadoda. Imodeli yezengqondo ezuzwe njengefa kusukela ebuntwaneni, lapho intombazane ibona uyise njengomuntu ophakeme, ingadlulela ekukhuleni, lapho owesifazane eqhubeka ebona amadoda njengezibalo zegunya noma amandla. Lokhu kungenza kube nzima ukusungula ubudlelwano obulinganayo, lapho bobabili abalingani bebonana njengabalinganayo.

Ezimweni ezithile, owesifazane angase athambekele thobela izifiso noma izidingo zomlingani wakho, efuna ukujabulisa noma ukuhambisana nemodeli yakhe yereferensi yesilisa. Lokhu kungaholela ekuntulekeni kokukhulumisana okunempilo ebudlelwaneni, lapho owesifazane edonsa kanzima ukuveza izifiso zakhe noma ukumela izidingo zakhe, ngenxa yokwesaba ukulahlekelwa uthando noma ukuvunyelwa umlingani wakhe. Lokhu kungalingani kungaholela ekunganeliseki ngokomzwelo isikhathi eside, lapho owesifazane ezozizwa engaqondakali, ngisho ecindezelekile, kodwa engazi ukuthi angaphuma kanjani kuleli phethini.

Ukuveza okulindelwe okungenangqondo kumlingani

Ekugcineni, omunye wemiphumela emikhulu ye I-Electra syndrome iyona ukuqagela okulindelwe okungenangqondo kumlingani wesilisa. Ngemva kokucabangela uyise ebuntwaneni, owesifazane angakwazi, ngokuqaphela noma engazi, afake lesi sithombe esifanelekile ebuhlotsheni bakhe bothando. Ulindele ukuthi umlingani wakhe afeze izidingo ezijulile ezingokomzwelo, ezivame ukuxhunyaniswa nezikhala ezingokomzwelo ezizwakala ebudlelwaneni noyise wakhe. Ngakho-ke angase abe nethemba lokuthi umlingani wakhe uzoba umthombo wokusekelwa okungenamibandela, ukuvikelwa nothando, ngaphandle kokuqonda ukuthi lokhu okulindelekile akunakwenzeka ukwanelisa ngokugcwele ebuhlotsheni obudala.

Lapho lezi zinto ezilindelwe zingafinyelelwa, owesifazane angase azizwe edumala kakhulu noma enomuzwa wokukhashelwa, ekholelwa ukuthi umlingani wakhe akakwazi ukumnika uthando olumfanele. Lokhu kuqagela kungadala ukungezwani nokukhungatheka ebudlelwaneni, ngoba indoda, ngakolunye uhlangothi, ingase ingawuqondi umthombo walezi zidingo ezingokomzwelo. Ngenxa yalokho, owesifazane angase asuke ebuhlotsheni obunye aye kobunye, efuna ngokujulile indoda “ephelele” ezogcina ifinyelele lokho ayekulindele, kuyilapho edumala njalo lapho iqiniso lingahambisani namaphupho akhe.

Ngamafuphi, umthelela we I-Electra syndrome ebudlelwaneni namadoda ekukhuleni kubonakala ukuguquguquka okuyinkimbinkimbi kokuncika ngokomzwelo, ukucinga izibalo zobaba, ukuba sengozini kwabakhohlisayo kanye nobunzima bokusungula ubudlelwano njengabantu abalinganayo. Lawa maphethini obudlelwane, ngokuvamile asukela ekunamatheleni okungakaxazululwa nobaba, angaholela ebudlelwaneni obungasebenzi kahle, lapho owesifazane edonsa kanzima ukuthola ukulingana okunempilo phakathi kwezidingo zakhe ezingokomzwelo kanye neqiniso labalingani bakhe.

Ukuhlukaniswa kwabazali, i-Electra & Narcissistic Perverts

Theukuhlukana kwabazali, ikakhulukazi lapho umama edlala indima ebalulekile kule nqubo, kungaba nemiphumela ehlala njalo nelimazayo ekukhuleni kwengqondo yentombazane, okunomthelela ekukhuleni kwengqondo. I-Electra syndrome ubudlelwano obungaxazululiwe nobunarcissistic ebudaleni. Nansi indlela lo mshini ongasebenza ngayo:

Ukuhlukaniswa kwabazali kanye nombono kababa

Njengengxenye yeukuhlukana kwabazali, lo umama ohlanekezelwe onarcissistic kungamehlisa noma kumehlise ubaba emehlweni engane, kudale isithombe esibi ngaye. Lokhu kwehla kwenani kungenza indodakazi izizwe ihlukene phakathi kothando lwayo ngoyise nokwethembeka kunina. Angase azizwe ecindezeleka ukuba ahambisane nomama, okungaholela ekutheni umbango naye, eqhakambisa ukungqubuzana kukababa nendodakazi kanye icala okuhambisana nokusondelana kwakhe nobaba wakhe. Ngakho, ingane iba nombono osontekile ngoyise, oba a into yezifiso ezingqubuzanayo, emcindezela ukuba akhulekele umfanekiso, empeleni, ovezwa kuye njengoyiphutha noma oyingozi.

Ukwakhiwa kobunikazi kanye namandla omama nendodakazi

Ukuhlukaniswa kwabazali nakho kungaphazamisa ukwakhiwa kobunikazi bendodakazi. Ngokuvezwa imiyalezo engemihle ngoyise, angase athuthuke a umbono osontekile wendima yomuntu siqu ekuguquguqukeni komndeni. Lokhu kungase kudale ukuhlonza okuqinile kumama, okuholela ekutheni a ukushintsha kwemizwelo nangokwengqondo lapho indodakazi izizwa ingqubuzana phakathi kwezifiso zayo zokuzimela kanye nalokho okulindelwe unina. Lokhu kuhlonza kungaholela embangweni unomphela, lapho indodakazi ifuna ukwedlula unina, izama ukukhombisa ukubaluleka kwayo, kodwa ingafinyeleli ukulinganisela ngokomzwelo.

I-Electra Syndrome Engaxazululiwe

Theukuhlukana kwabazali ngqo kunomthelela a I-Electra syndrome engaxazululiwe ukuvimbela ubudlelwano obuhle nobaba. Ingane ayikwazi ukuthuthukisa ukunamathela okulinganiselayo kulo mfanekiso wesilisa, futhi lokhu kuntuleka kokuxhumana okunempilo kuholela ekulungiseni ubaba, obese ebhekwa njengongenakufinyeleleka noma oncishisiwe. Lokhu kungqubuzana kwakha a iphethini yokunamathisela engalinganiseli, lapho indodakazi iba khona ekutholeni imvume kayise kuyilapho izwa ukukhungatheka okujulile ngenxa yokungafinyeleleki komzwelo. Lesi simo sidala ukufuna uthando nokuqinisekisa okungamholela ekubeni angene ebudlelwaneni obungasebenzi kahle njengomuntu omdala.

Ubudlelwano nabalingani be-narcissistic

Ekukhuleni, owesifazane owayengaphansiukuhlukana kwabazali futhi waphila a I-Electra syndrome Okungaxazululiwe kungase kube sengozini ikakhulukazi ebudlelwaneni nozakwethu be-narcissistic. Lawa madoda, ngokuvamile anothando futhi akhangayo, angase aqale abonakale ehlangabezana nezidingo zakhe ezingokomzwelo, kodwa isimo sawo sobugovu nokukhohlisayo sandisa umjikelezo wokuncika. Owesifazane, njengoba enikezwe isimo sokufuna imvume kwabesilisa, angase azithole esefisa abalingani bakhe abanganakile, okuthi lapho eqala ukufeza izifiso zakhe zothando, agcine esexhaphaza ukuba sengozini kwakhe.

Ukwesaba ukulahlwa, okukhuliswa okuhlangenwe nakho kokuhlukaniswa kwabazali, kuqinisa lokhu okuguquguqukayo, kucindezela owesifazane ukuba amukele ukuziphatha okuhlukumezayo ukuze alondoloze ubuhlobo, ngendlela efanayo naleyo afunda ngayo ukulondoloza isibopho noyise naphezu kokwehluleka. Ukwesaba ukulahlekelwa uthando lukazakwenu we-narcissistic kungaholela ekuziphatheni okuzithobayo kanye nokuntuleka kwemingcele, okwenza kube nzima ukwephula lo mjikelezo wobudlelwane obulimazayo.

Abacwaningi abasebenza ku-Electra complex

Abacwaningi abaningana ku-psychology kanye ne-psychoanalysis baye bafunda futhi bajulisa umqondo we Electra complex, ngayinye iletha umbono oyingqayizivele kulesi simo.

U-Carl Jung: Umdali womqondo we-Electra complex

UCarl Jung ungumbhali waleli gama Electra complex, eyethula ukuhlukanisa ubaba-indodakazi eguquguqukayo kunina nendodana eguquguqukayo ekuhlaziyeni kwengqondo. UJung wayefuna ukugcizelela ukuthi amantombazane adlula esigabeni sokukhula lapho ukunamathela kubaba kuphakathi nendawo nalapho umama engabonakala njengembangi.

NgokukaJung, i- Electra complex kuyindlela engokwemvelo yokuthuthukiswa kwengqondo, kodwa okuthi, lapho ingaxazululwa kahle, ingaholela ekuphazamisekeni kwemizwelo lapho umuntu esemdala.

Le I-Electra syndrome, ngezinye izikhathi esetshenziswa ngokushintshana ne Electra complex, igama le-psychoanalytic elethulwa ngu-Carl Jung ukuchaza ukuguquguquka okuthile kwengqondo phakathi kwendodakazi noyise. Lo mqondo uphefumulelwe izinganekwane zamaGreki, lapho u-Electra eyindodakazi ka-Agamemnon enenzondo enkulu ngonina, uClytemnestra, ngemva kokubulawa kukayise. Embonweni kaJungian, i I-Electra syndrome sibonisa isimo sokuquleka indodakazi engase sibe nayo kuyise, ngokuvamile okuphawulwa ukukhangwa okunamandla ngokomzwelo futhi, kwezinye izimo, ukuncintisana okuqondile nomama.

UCarl Jung, ngokwakha umqondo we Electra complex, wayefuna ukuqedela inkolelo-mbono kaFreud ye-Oedipus complex, eyayichaza ubuhlobo bukamama nendodana. UJung waphawula ukuthi amadodakazi nawo adlula esigabeni esibucayi sobulili bobulili, lapho eba nokusondelana okuqinile ngokomzwelo kukayise, ngokuvamile okuhambisana nomuzwa wokuncintisana nomama wawo ukuze awanakekele. KuJung, lokhu kuqhudelana kwendodakazi kamama nokunamathela kubaba akukona ngempela ukugula, kodwa kuyindlela evamile yokukhula. Kodwa-ke, lapho lesi sifo singaxazululeki ebuntwaneni, singaba nomthelela omubi ebuhlotsheni bothando bomuntu wesifazane nomndeni lapho esekhulile.

Le I-Electra syndrome, ngokombono ka-Jung, ngakho-ke kuyisimo sokudluliselwa equlekile lapho indodakazi iveza ukufaneleka kowesilisa kuyise, okwenza iphethini yobudlelwane engaphindwa kamuva ekuphileni. Uma lokhu kungqubuzana kungaxazululeki ngendlela efanele, kungaholela ezindabeni zokuncika ngokomzwelo, ukuthambekela ekufuneni izibalo zabesilisa abanegunya, noma ubunzima bokusungula ubudlelwano obunempilo nabanye abantu besifazane. U-Carl Jung wabona lesi sifo njengengxenye ebalulekile yokuthuthukiswa kobunikazi besifazane, okunomthelela omkhulu endleleni owesifazane azibheka ngayo ebudlelwaneni bakhe nabanye kanye naye ngokwakhe.

U-Sigmund Freud: I-Theorist ye-Oedipus complex

nakuba Sigmund Freud akazange athuthukise umqondo we Electra complex, umsebenzi wakhe ku- I-Oedipus complex kube nomthelela omkhulu ekuqondeni ukuguquguquka komndeni. UFreud wayekholelwa ukuthi amantombazane aqala ukukhangwa oyise ngesikhathi se-Oedipal, nakuba ayengakuboni kudingekile ukuhlukanisa lokhu kuguquguquka kokwabafana.

UFreud wabona lesi sigaba njengenqubo yemvelo yokukhula kwengqondo, okufanele inqotshwe ukuze ingane ikwazi ukwakha ubudlelwano obunempilo lapho isikhulile.

UMelanie Klein: Ukujulisa ubudlelwano bukamama nengane

Melanie Klein, isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo saseBrithani, saba nesandla ekuhloleni ubuhlobo bomkhaya ngokugxila ngokukhethekile esibophweni sikamama nengane. Umsebenzi wakhe unikeze ukuqonda ngombango phakathi kwendodakazi nomama, kanye nomthelela wobudlelwano babazali bokuqala emqondweni.

U-Klein ubonise ukuthi lokhu kuqhudelana okungazi lutho nomama kungase kube nemiphumela yesikhathi eside, kube nomthelela endleleni abesifazane abakha ngayo ubudlelwano babo besifazane lapho sebekhulile.

U-Nancy Chodorow: Ukukhiqizwa kabusha kwezindima zabazali

Nancy Chodorow isazi sokusebenza kwengqondo saseMelika kanye nesazi sezokuhlalisana kwabantu esifunde izindima zobulili emndenini kanye nokuzala kwazo ezizukulwaneni ngezizukulwane. UChodorow ugqamise ukubaluleka kobudlelwane basebancane nobaba nomama ekwakhiweni kolwazi lwezingane ngokocansi kanye nemizwa.

Ubonise ukuthi abesifazane bangakwazi kanjani ukukhiqiza kabusha ngokungazi amaphethini athile obudlelwano abaye bawabona emndenini wabo, okuhlanganisa namandla Electra complex.

lwezincwadi

Nansi ukukhethwa kwezincwadi nemibhalo eyinkomba ukuze ujulise ukuqonda kwayo Electra complex kanye namandla omndeni:

  1. UCarl Jung – I-Psychology yokuquleka (1912)
  2. Sigmund Freud – I-Totem ne-Taboo (1913)
  3. Melanie Klein – Uthando, icala kanye nokubuyisela (1937)
  4. Nancy Chodorow – Ukukhiqizwa Komama (1978)
  5. UFrançoise Dolto – I-lobster complex (1984)
  6. UJulia Christeva – izindaba zothando (1985)

Le misebenzi ihlinzeka ngemibono ebalulekile yokuqonda ukuguquguquka komndeni kanye nomthelela wako ekukhuleni kwengqondo yamantombazane.

Udinga ukukhuluma nomuntu oqondayo?

UCristina ubelokhu esekela izisulu zokuhlukunyezwa ngokuzikhukhumeza iminyaka eminingi. Uhlelo oluqondile lwesenzo lusungulwa kusukela esimisweni sokuqala. Izikhathi zokuqeqesha ngazinye ziyatholakala ngevidiyo (Skype noma WhatsApp) — €100 ngeseshini.

Bhukha iseshini yami yomuntu siqu noCristina

Want to break free from this hold?

The Complete Narcissism Release (PDF book) and the Musc essential oil guide you step by step – at your own pace, at home.

Discover the release + oil

All releases (PDF books) · Essential oils

Want to break free from this hold?

The Complete Narcissism Release (PDF book) and the Musc essential oil guide you step by step – at your own pace, at home.

Discover the release + oil

All releases (PDF books) · Essential oils

Want to break free from this hold?

The Complete Narcissism Release (PDF book) and the Musc essential oil guide you step by step – at your own pace, at home.

Discover the release + oil

All releases (PDF books) · Essential oils

Want to break free from this hold?

The Complete Narcissism Release (PDF book) and the Musc essential oil guide you step by step – at your own pace, at home.

Discover the release + oil

All releases (PDF books) · Essential oils

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