Uthando kanye ne-amnesia: into eyinkimbinkimbi ebuhlotsheni

Uthando ne-amnesia kungase kubonakale kuyimibono ekude kakhulu. Kodwa-ke, lezi zimo ezimbili kwesinye isikhathi zixhumene kakhulu ebudlelwaneni obuthile. I-Amnesia, noma ngabe ingokoqobo noma ifanisiwe, ingaba nomthelela omkhulu ku-dynamics yothando. Lesi sihloko sihlola izici ezihlukene ze-amnesia kumongo wobudlelwane bothando, sihlola izimbangela zakho, ukubonakaliswa kanye nemiphumela.

Iyini i-amnesia kumongo wothando?

I-Amnesia kumongo wothando ingathatha izinhlobo eziningana. Lokhu kungase kube ukulahlekelwa inkumbulo kwangempela ngenxa yokulimala noma isimo sezempilo. Kodwa kaningi, ebudlelwaneni, sikhuluma ngohlobo lwe-amnesia ekhethiwe noma yomzwelo.

Le amnesia ekhethiwe yenzeka lapho umuntu ebonakala “ekhohlwa” izehlakalo ezithile noma ukuziphatha, ngokuvamile okungekuhle. Ebudlelwaneni bothando, lokhu kungase kuhlanganise:

• Ukukhohlwa izithembiso ezenziwe kozakwethu
• Ukuphika ukuziphatha okulimazayo kwangaphambilini
• Ukungakwazi ukukhumbula izingxabano ezibalulekile noma izinkinga ebudlelwaneni

Kubalulekile ukuqaphela ukuthi lolu hlobo lwe-amnesia aluhlali luqaphela noma luhlose. Kungase kube umphumela wezinqubo eziyinkimbinkimbi zengqondo.

Izimbangela ze-amnesia ebudlelwaneni bothando

Kunezici ezimbalwa ezingaba nomthelela ekubukekeni kwe-amnesia ebuhlotsheni bothando:

• Le indlela yokuzivikela ngokwengqondo

I-Amnesia ingaba indlela yokuzivikela equlekile. Ingqondo “iyakhohlwa” izehlakalo ezibuhlungu noma ezicindezelayo ukuze izivikele. Ebudlelwaneni, lokhu kungasho ukukhohlwa izingxabano noma izikhathi ezinzima.

• Ukuthambekela ekufezeni izifiso

Ekuqaleni kobudlelwane, kuvamile ukwenza umlingani wakho abe ngcono. Lokhu kuqonda kungaholela ohlotsheni lwe-amnesia ekhethiwe lapho sikhumbula kuphela izici ezinhle zobudlelwano.

• I-Narcissism kanye ne-egocentrism

Abanye abantu, ikakhulukazi labo abanezici ze-narcissistic, bangase bakhe uhlobo lwe-amnesia ekhethiwe. “Bakhohlwa” ukuziphatha kwabo okungalungile ukuze balondoloze isithombe sabo siqu.

• Ukucindezeleka nokukhathala

Ukucindezeleka okungapheli nokukhathala kungathinta inkumbulo. Ebudlelwaneni obucindezelayo, lokhu kungabonakala njengokukhohlwa njalo, ngisho nezici ezibalulekile zobudlelwano.

I-amnesia ibonakala kanjani othandweni?

I-Amnesia ebudlelwaneni bothando ingazibonakalisa ngezindlela ezahlukene:

• Ukukhohlwa okukhethekile kokungqubuzana

Omunye umlingani angase abonakale “ekhohlwa” izingxabano noma ukungaboni ngaso linye, ngisho nezakamuva. Lokhu kungadala umuzwa wokuphika iqiniso komunye uzakwethu.

• Ukubhala kabusha umlando wobudlelwano

Kwesinye isikhathi umlingani angashintsha ngokungazi izinkumbulo zakhe zobudlelwano. Angakwazi ukuhlobisa imicimbi ethile noma alulaze ezinye, enze inguqulo efanelekile yendaba yombhangqwana.

• Ukungakwazi ukukhumbula izithembiso noma izibopho

I-Amnesia ingazibonakalisa ngokukhohlwa njalo izithembiso ezenziwa kumlingani. Lokhu kungase kuhlanganise izibopho ezibalulekile njengamaphrojekthi ahlanganyelwe noma izibopho ezabiwe.

• Ukuphika ukuziphatha okwedlule

Kwezinye izimo, umlingani angase aphike ngokuphelele ukuzibandakanya ekuziphatheni okuthile, ngisho nalapho ebhekene nobufakazi. Lokhu kuphika kungakholisa kangangokuthi empeleni ubonakala engakhumbuli.

Imiphumela ye-amnesia ebudlelwaneni bothando

I-Amnesia, noma ingokoqobo noma ibonwa, ingaba nemiphumela ebalulekile ebudlelwaneni bothando:

• La ukulahlekelwa ukuzethemba

Lapho umlingani ehlala ebonakala ekhohlwa izici ezibalulekile zobudlelwano, kungaqeda ukwethembana. Omunye umlingani angase aqale ukungabaza ubuqotho nokuzinikela komngane wakhe.

• Izingxabano eziqhubekayo

I-amnesia ekhethiwe ingaholela ekuphindaphindweni kwezingxabano ezifanayo. Uma umlingani engakhumbuli izinkinga zesikhathi esidlule, kunzima ukuzixazulula futhi uqhubeke.

• Umuzwa wokungavumelekile

Uma omunye umlingani ephika noma ekhohlwa izenzakalo ezithile njalo, omunye angase abe nomuzwa wokuthi okuhlangenwe nakho kwakhe kanye nemizwa yakhe akulungile. Lokhu kungadala umuzwa ojulile wokuthi ukuhlala yedwa kanye nokungaqondi kahle.

• Ubunzima bokwakha umlando ofanayo

I-Amnesia ebuhlotsheni ingenza kube nzima ukwakha indaba eyabiwe. Uma izinkumbulo zingabelwe noma zihlale zibuzwa, umbhangqwana ungase ube nobunzima ekuthuthukiseni umuzwa wobunye nokuqhubeka.

Uthando, i-amnesia nokuhlukunyezwa: isixhumanisi esiyinkimbinkimbi

Kubalulekile ukuqaphela ukuthi i-amnesia ebudlelwaneni bothando kwesinye isikhathi ingaxhunyaniswa namandla ahlukumezayo:

• I-Amnesia njengendlela yokukhwabanisa

Kwezinye izimo, i-amnesia ingasetshenziswa njengendlela yokukhwabanisa. Uzakwethu ohlukumezayo angase enze sengathi akakhumbuli ukuziphatha kwakhe okubi ukuze agweme ukuziphendulela.

• Ukukhanyisa igesi kanye ne-amnesia

Ukukhanyisa igesi, uhlobo lokuhlukumeza ngokwengqondo, ngokuvamile kuhilela uhlobo lwe-amnesia ezenziwa. Umhlukumezi uphika ngokuhlelekile iqiniso elitholwa isisulu sakhe, okumenza angabaze inkumbulo yakhe kanye nombono wezenzakalo.

• I-amnesia ebuhlungu

Ezimweni zokuhlukunyezwa kanzima, isisulu singase sibe uhlobo lwangempela lwe-amnesia ebuhlungu. Ubuchopho buvimba izinkumbulo ezithile ukuze zizivikele ekuhlukumezekeni okuhlangenwe nakho.

Uthando ne-amnesia: imiphumela empilweni yengqondo yozakwethu

I-Amnesia ebudlelwaneni ingaba nomthelela omkhulu empilweni yengqondo yabo bobabili abalingani:

• Ukukhathazeka kanye ukucindezeleka

Uzakwethu obhekene ne-amnesia yomunye angase abe nokukhathazeka nokudangala. Ukungabaza njalo kanye nemizwa yokungavumelekile kungaba umthwalo onzima ngokwengqondo.

• Ukudideka nokudideka

I-Amnesia ingadala umuzwa wokudideka nokudideka ebudlelwaneni. Ozakwethu bangase bazizwe sengathi baphila kumaqiniso afanayo, okungabaphazamisa kakhulu.

• Ukulahlekelwa ukuzethemba

Kumlingani okuhlangenwe nakho kwakhe okuphikiswa njalo noma okukhohliwe, lokhu kungaholela ekulahlekelweni ukuzethemba. Angase aqale ukungabaza umbono wakhe nokufaneleka kwakhe.

Amnesia nokuxhumana kwabashadile

I-Amnesia ingaba nomthelela omkhulu ekuxhumaneni phakathi kwabashadikazi:

• Ukungaqondi okuvamile

Lapho umlingani oyedwa evame ukukhohlwa izingxoxo noma izivumelwano, kungase kubangele ukungezwani okuphindaphindiwe nokukhungathekisayo.

• Ubunzima bokuxazulula izingxabano

Uma umlingani engakhumbuli izinkinga ezedlule, kuba nzima ukusondelana nokuzixazulula ngendlela eyakhayo.

• Isidingo esiqhubekayo sezikhumbuzi

Uzakwethu obhekene ne-amnesia yomunye angase azizwe ephoqelekile ukuthi ahlale ekhumbuza abantu ngezinto, ezingadala umzali nengane ashukumisayo kunobudlelwane phakathi kwabantu abadala abalinganayo.

Isiphetho

Sengiphetha, i-amnesia ebudlelwaneni bothando iyinto eyinkimbinkimbi, enezici eziningi. Noma ngabe kungokoqobo, kuyabonwa noma kusetshenziswe njengendlela yokuzivikela, kungaba nemiphumela ejulile ku-dynamics yombhangqwana. Ukuqonda lezi zindlela kungasiza umuntu ukuthi azulazule kangcono ezinseleleni azethulayo, kodwa kubalulekile ukuqaphela lapho i-amnesia iba uphawu lwezinkinga ezijulile ebudlelwaneni. Kwezinye izimo, ukungenelela kochwepheshe kungase kudingeke ukusiza umbhangqwana ukuba unqobe lobu bunzima futhi wakhe ubuhlobo obunempilo nobulinganiselayo.