Ukunqoba umhawu: Ukuthola inkululeko yakho kumuntu ohlanekezelekayo

Umona umzwelo oyinkimbinkimbi futhi ovame ukuba buhlungu, owandiswa ebudlelwaneni obunobuthi nomuntu ophendukezela i-narcissistic. Kulo mongo, iba yisikhali sokukhohlisa, esisetshenziselwa ukulawula nokugcina ukulawula phezu kwalowo ohlukunyeziwe. Kwabesifazane abavaleleke kulokhu kuguquguquka, kubalulekile ukuqonda izindlela ezidala lomona. Kulesi sihloko sizohlola ukuthi kanjani ukunqoba umona futhi uphinde ulawule impilo yakho.

Iyini i-narcissistic pervert kanye nomthelela wayo womzwelo?

Un i-narcissistic pervert ungumuntu ophethwe yi-narcissistic personality disorder. Laba bantu babonakala ngesidingo esiqhubekayo sokunconywa nokuqinisekiswa, kuyilapho bengenalo uzwela kwabanye. Ebudlelwaneni, bavame ukusebenzisa amasu okukhohlisa ngokwengqondo ukuze bagcine abalingani babo belawulwa. THE ukukhanyisa igesi, lo ukuthula noma ukungathembeki kuyizibonelo ezivamile zokuziphatha okuvusa inkanuko la umhawu ogulayo ku isisulu sabo.

Izinhlobo ezahlukene zomona

Umona uvame ukuba yisici sabahlanekezeli be-narcissistic, kodwa ungazibonakalisa ngezindlela ezahlukene. Nazi izinhlobo eziyinhloko zomona ezingabonwa ku-narcissistic pervert:

1. Isikhwele sokuphatha :
   • Ukulawula okweqile kwezenzo zozakwethu
   • Imibuzo ejwayelekile mayelana nemisebenzi kanye nobudlelwano
   • Ukukhawulelwa kwenkululeko yozakwethu
2. Umona weParanoid :
   • Ukusolwa njalo kokungathembeki, ngisho ngaphandle kobufakazi
   • Ukuchazwa kabi kwezimo ezingasho lutho
   • Izinsolo eziphindaphindiwe nezingenasisekelo
3. Umhawu wokuqhathanisa :
   • Ukuqhathanisa njalo nozakwethu bangaphambili noma abanye abantu
   • Ukuzizwa uphansi okufihlwe ukugxekwa kozakwethu
   • Udinga ukuzizwa uphakeme kunanoma yimuphi ongase abe imbangi
4. Umona wokuqagela :
   • Ukuqagela izifiso zomuntu zokungathembeki kumlingani
   • Ukumangalelwa kozakwethu ngokuziphatha lapho umuntu ophendukezela i-narcissistic enecala lakhe
5. Umona wokukhohlisa :
   • Ukusebenzisa Umona Njengethuluzi Lokulawula Nokukhwabanisa
   • Ukusungulwa kwesimo sokuba necala kumlingani
   • Ukungathembeki ngokomzwelo ngokusekelwe emhawini
6. Umhawu omsulwa we-narcissistic :
   • Ukungakwazi ukubekezelela ukuthi umlingani unezinye izithakazelo
   • Udinga ukuhlala ube yisikhungo sokunakwa
   • Umona kubangani, umndeni, ngisho nezingane zomlingani
7. Umona we-retroactive :
   • Ukuthatheka ngexa elidlule lezothando lozakwethu
   • Ukusola njalo mayelana nobudlelwano obudlule
   • Ukungakwazi ukwamukela ukuthi umlingani wayenempilo ngaphambi kobudlelwane bamanje

Umona njengesikhali somuntu ohlanekezela ama-narcissistic

Le i-narcissistic pervert wazi kahle ukuthi angawusebenzisa kanjani umona ukuze azuze. Udala izimo ezingacacile lapho eshiya isisulu sakhe singaqiniseki. Lokhu kungase kuhlanganise ukusebenzelana okungacacile nabanye abantu noma ukuziphatha okukude ngamabomu.

Ukukhohlisa ngokungaqondakali nangokuthula

Elinye lamaqhinga ajwayeleke kakhulu ama-narcissists ukukhohlisa isisulu sabo ngokudlala ngokungaqondakali. Isibonelo, bangase bagcine ubudlelwano obuyimfihlakalo noma basebenzise inkundla yezokuxhumana ukuze babonise impilo “ephelele” nezimele, kuyilapho bengamnaki abalingani babo. Lokhu kuvusa umuzwa oshubile we umhawu, ngoba isisulu siyazibuza ukuthi kungani singaseyona into ehamba phambili kumlingani wakhe. Le ndlela, eyaziwa ngokuthi “akukho mpendulo”, kuhlanganisa ukungamnaki isisulu ngaphandle kokusika ukuthintana, ngaleyo ndlela kudala umuzwa wokuncika ngokomzwelo. I-narcissist ihlala ikhona empilweni yesisulu, kodwa yenqaba noma yikuphi ukuxhumana okucacile.

Ukubaluleka kokuqaphela ukukhohlisa

Isinyathelo sokuqala for ukunqoba umona ukuqaphela ukuthi lo muzwa uyasetshenziswa hhayi umphumela wobudlelwane bothando obujwayelekile. Abesifazane abavaleleke kulobu budlelwano kumele baqonde ukuthi umona usuke ucasulwa ngamabomu ukuze ubabambe. Lokhu akukhona ukuvezwa kokubaluleka kwabo noma amandla abo okuthanda, kodwa kunalokho kuyindlela yokubusa i-narcissist.

Izinyathelo Zokunqoba Umona Nokubuyisela Ukulawula

Kunqobe umhawu kudinga indlela ehlakaniphile nehlelekile. Nazi izinyathelo ezibalulekile zokuzikhulula ekulawuleni imizwa futhi uthole ubuwena.

1. Qaphela iqiniso

Le i-narcissistic pervert kudala izimo lapho isisulu sizwa sengathi sihlala siqhudelana ukuze sinakwe. Kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuthi lesi simo asibonisi ukuntula isisulu, kodwa kuyisu lamabomu lokudala ukuncika. Umona akubona ubufakazi bothando noma inkanuko, kodwa ithuluzi lokukhohlisa. Ukuqaphela leli qiniso kukuvumela ukuthi uqale ukuzikhipha ngokomzwelo kulo muntu onobuthi.

2. Nquma ukuthintana nomuntu oyi-narcissistic pervert

Inselele enkulu ekunqobeni umona wukuyeka ukufuna izimpendulo kumuntu obhedayo. Abesifazane abaningi balindele uhlobo oluthile lwe lokuvala noma ukuqinisekiswa, ngethemba lokuthi i-narcissist ekugcineni izozibona ngenani lazo langempela. Nokho, lokhu akusoze kwenzeka. Ngakho-ke kubalulekile ukunqamula konke ukuxhumana, ukusungula a nqamula ukuxhumana (“akekho ongathintwayo”) ukuze kuvinjwe i-narcissist ekubambeni kwayo.

Ukuvimba i-narcissist kuzo zonke iziteshi zokuxhumana kuyisinyathelo esinzima, kodwa esibalulekile. Lokhu kukukhulula ekulindeni njalo impendulo noma ukuqashelwa, futhi kukuvumela ukuthi uqale ukuphulukisa. Khumbula ukuthi noma yiluphi uhlobo lokuxhumana, noma ngabe luncane kangakanani, luqinisa amandla okulawula e-narcissist.

3. Gxila kuwena nasekuthuthukeni kwakho

Uma ukuxhumana kwephukile, yisikhathi sokuphinde ugxile kuwena. THE ama-narcissistic perverts ngokuvamile balulaza izisulu zabo, okuholela ekulahlekelweni ukuzethemba. Ukubamba iqhaza emisebenzini eyakha ukuzethemba kwakho futhi ikuxhume kabusha ezintweni ozithandayo kubalulekile kuyo ukunqoba umona.

Ukuzithuthukisa komuntu siqu, ngokwelashwa noma imikhuba efana nokuzindla, kukuvumela ukuthi uphinde uthole amandla akho futhi uphinde ukwazi ukulawula impilo yakho. Awusakudingi ukuqinisekiswa kwangaphandle ukuze uzizwe ufanelekile noma uthandwa. Lesi sigaba sokuzinqoba sibalulekile ukuze ugqashule unomphela emoneni onobuthi.

Amandla okungabuyi: asisakufuni ukuqinisekiswa

Isinyathelo sokugcina se ukunqoba umona ukwamukela ukuthi i-narcissist ayisoze yakunikeza ukuqinisekiswa okufunayo. Kuyisifundo esinzima ukusamukela, kodwa sibalulekile ekubuyiseni inkululeko yakho yomzwelo. I-narcissist yenqaba noma yiluphi uhlobo lwe lokuvala, ngoba ufuna ukulondoloza ukubambelela kwakhe. Ukuqonda lokhu kukuvumela ukuthi uyeke ukufuna ukubuyisana noma izincazelo ezingasoze zafika.

Inkululeko yeqiniso ilele ekukwazini kwakho ukuzinika lokho kuvaleka. Awudingi imvume ye-narcissist ukuze uqhubeke. Ukufunda ukuziqinisekisa nokuzikhulula kulesi sidingo kuyisinyathelo sokugcina sokuphola ngokuphelele.

Izinkomba zezincwadi zokunqoba umona

1. Sigmund Freud – Ezinye izindlela ze-neurotic kumona, i-paranoia kanye nobungqingili (1922)
   UFreud uhlola umona ngokuwuxhumanisa nezinqubo ze-neurotic kanye nesenzakalo sokulila, kanye ne-paranoia. Le ndlela ye-psychoanalytic ibalulekile ekuqondeni ukuguquguquka kokungazi ngemuva komhawu
2. UBéatrice Guernier – Nqoba umona
   Le ncwadi isondela kumhawu ngokombono wokuthuthuka komuntu siqu futhi inikeza izindlela zokuwunqoba, ikubheka njengethuba lokukhula ngokomzwelo nobudlelwane.
3. Gérard Pommier – Ukuphika ucansi (2009)
   I-Pommier ikhuluma ngomhawu kumongo wobudlelwane bothando, ixhuma nemibuzo yobunikazi nesifiso. Ihlaziya ukuthi ukuphika nokucindezelwa kungawubhebhethekisa kanjani umona, ikakhulukazi ebudlelwaneni bothando.
4. UPaul-Laurent Assoun – Freud nomona (2005)
   U-Assoun uhlola indawo eyinhloko yomona emsebenzini kaFreud futhi ubonisa ukuthi lo muzwa uhlela kanjani ukuguquguquka kobudlelwane babantu. Uhlobanisa umona nemiqondo ye-Freudian efana ne-Oedipus complex.
5. UMarie-Claude Bourque – I-Psychopathology yomona (2017)
   Lo msebenzi uqokomisa izinhlobo ezahlukene zomhawu we-pathological futhi unikeza imibono yokwelapha ukusiza abantu ukuphatha kangcono lo mzwelo ekuphileni kwabo kwansuku zonke.
6. UJohn T. Cacioppo noWilliam Patrick – Isizungu: Imvelo Yomuntu kanye Nesidingo Sokuxhumana Nomphakathi (2009)
   Nakuba le ncwadi ngokuyinhloko ikhuluma ngesizungu, ikhuluma ngomhawu njengomphumela ongaba khona wokuzihlukanisa nomphakathi nokungazethembi, ihlinzeka ngombono wengqondo nowesayensi yezinzwa.

Isiphetho: Nqoba umona futhi ulawule impilo yakho

Kunqobe umona wenarcissistic pervert kuyinselelo enkulu, kodwa akuyona into engenakwenzeka. Ngokubona amaphethini akhohlisayo, ukunqamula ukuthintana nokugxila enhlalakahleni yakho, kungenzeka ukuthi uzikhulule kulokhu kubamba okunobuthi. Ufanelwe ukuphila impilo lapho uzizwa uthandwa, uhlonishwa, futhi ulawula imizwa yakho. Nqoba umona yisinyathelo sokuqala esibheke kule mpilo entsha.