Ukukhohlisa kwemizwelo: Ukuqonda nokuzikhulula ethonyeni le-PN

Ukukhohlisa imizwa kuyindlela ecashile yokulawula ingqondo evame ukusetshenziswa abaphendukezeli be-narcissistic. Uma uyisisulu salolu hlobo lokuziphatha okunobuthi, yazi ukuthi awuwedwa futhi zikhona izindlela zokuphuma kukho. Le ndatshana ihlose ukukusiza ukuthi uqonde izindlela zokuxhaphaza imizwa futhi ikunikeze amathuluzi ukuze uzikhulule kukho.

Bona izimpawu zokuxhashazwa ngokomzwelo

Isinyathelo sokuqala sokuzikhulula ethonyeni lomuntu ophendukezela i-narcissistic ukuthi ukwazi ukubona izimpawu zokuxhaphaza imizwa. Nazi ezinye izindlela zokuziphatha ongazibukela:

• ukukhanya kwegesi Umkhohlisi uyaphika iqiniso futhi akwenze ungabaze umbono wakho ngezenzakalo.
• Ukungathembeki ngokomzwelo Usebenzisa imizwa yakho ngokumelene nawe. ukwenza umuntu azizwe enecala futhi athole lokho akufunayo.
• Unxantathu: Idala izingxabano phakathi kwakho nabanye abantu ukuze ugcine ukulawula.
• Kuyashisa nokubanda: Kushintshana phakathi kwezikhathi zothando olukhulu kanye nezikhathi zokubanda noma ukwenqatshwa.
• Ukuqagela: Ukubeka icala ngamaphutha akhe noma ukuziphatha okungalungile.

Uma uqaphela lezi zimpawu ebuhlotsheni bakho, kubalulekile ukuqaphela ukuthi kungenzeka uyisisulu sokuxhashazwa ngokomzwelo.

Ukuqonda izindlela zokukhohlisa kwe-narcissistic

Abahlanekezeli be-Narcissistic basebenzisa amasu ahlukahlukene ukukhohlisa izisulu zabo. Ngokuqonda lezi zindlela, uzohlonyiswa kangcono ukubhekana nazo:

1. I-Isolement : Umkhohlisi ufuna ukukuhlukanisa nabasondelene nawe ukuze ukwandise ukuncika kwakho kuye.
2. Ukwehla kwenani: Kuhlasela ukuzethemba kwakho ukuze kukwenze ube sengozini enkulu.
3. Izikhawu: Ishintshana phakathi kwezinkathi “zomvuzo” kanye “nesijeziso” ukuze ikuphazamise.
4. Ukuguqulwa kwendima: Uzenza isisulu kanti ungumhlukumezi.
5. Ukukhohlisa kolimi: Usebenzisa imishwana engaqondakali noma amazwibela ukuze akudide.

Ngokukhomba lawa maqhinga, uzokwazi ukumelana nawo kangcono futhi uphinde ukwazi ukulawula imizwa yakho.

Imithelela engokwengqondo yokukhohlisa imizwa

Ukuxhashazwa ngokomzwelo kungaba nemiphumela emibi kakhulu empilweni yengqondo yezisulu. Phakathi kwemiphumela evame kakhulu yilezi:

1. Ukwehla okukhulu kokuzethemba
2. Imizwa enecala nehlazo engenasizathu
3. Ukukhathazeka novalo
4. Izimpawu zokucindezeleka
5. Umuzwa wokungabi nakuzisiza nokuphelelwa ithemba
6. Ubunzima bokwethemba abanye

Kubalulekile ukuqaphela le mithelela ukuze ubhekane nayo futhi uqale inqubo yokuphulukisa.

Isixhumanisi phakathi kokukhohliswa ngokomzwelo nokuhlukunyezwa kwe-narcissistic

La ukuxhashazwa ngokomzwelo yisikhali esikhethwa abahlukumezi be-narcissistic. Ibavumela ukuthi balawule ngokwengqondo isisulu sabo ngokudlala ngemizwelo yabo. Nazi ezinye zezindlela ezivame ukusetshenziswa kulolu hlobo lokuhlukumeza:

• Ukukhanyisa igesi : I-narcissist yenza isisulu singabaze imibono yaso kanye nezinkumbulo, kudala ukudideka kwengqondo. Le nqubo ihlose ukwenza buthaka amandla okwahlulela ohlukunyeziwe.
• Ukushintshaniswa kokuthopha nokwehliswa kwenani : I-narcissist iyashintshana phakathi kokuncoma nokugxeka okunzima, okudala isimo sokungavikeleki. Isisulu sibe sesihlala sifuna imvume kumhlukumezi, ngaleyo ndlela siqinise ukuncika ngokomzwelo.
• Icala : Umhlukumezi ulawula imizwa yecala yesisulu ukuze amenze abe necala ezinkingeni zobudlelwane. Lokhu kuvumela ukulawula okungaqondile ukuthi kugcinwe ngokusungula umuzwa oqhubekayo wephutha.
• Ukuthula okujezisayo : I-narcissist isebenzisa ukuthula njengesikhali sokujezisa isisulu, ngaleyo ndlela iqinise ukuzihlukanisa ngokomzwelo. Lokhu kudala ukungalingani lapho isisulu sizizwa sinqatshiwe futhi sincishiwe, kuqhubeke kugcizelele isidingo saso sokuqinisekiswa.

Ukuhlukunyezwa kwe-Narcissistic akugcini nje ekuxhashazweni ngokomzwelo, kodwa lokhu kuvame ukuba isisekelo sakho, ngoba kuvumela umhlukumezi ukuthi alondoloze ukulawula kwakhe omunye ngendlela ecashile nelimazayo.

Izinsiza ezitholakalayo zezisulu zokuxhashazwa ngokomzwelo

Kunezinsiza eziningi zokukusiza ukuthi udlule kule nselele:

• Izingcingo zosizo ezikhethekile
• Izingxoxo namaqembu okusekela
• Izinhlangano ezisekela izisulu
• Izincwadi nama-podcasts ngesihloko
• Abelaphi abangochwepheshe be-relational trauma

Ungangabazi ukusebenzisa lezi zinsiza, akumele udlule kulokhu uwedwa.

Ukuvimbela ukuxhashazwa ngokomzwelo: ukuthuthukisa ubuhlakani bakho bomzwelo

Ukuze ugweme ukubuyela ebuhlotsheni obunobuthi, kubalulekile ukuthuthukisa ubuhlakani bakho bomzwelo. Nansi indlela:

1. Funda ukuhlonza nokubiza imizwa yakho
2. Thuthukisa uzwela lwakho ngenkathi ugcina imingcele enempilo
3. Sebenza ngokugomela kwakho
4. Hlakulela ukukhulumisana okukhululekile nokwethembeka
5. Funda ukuphatha izingxabano ngendlela eyakhayo

Ngokuthuthukisa lawa makhono, uzohlonyiswa kangcono ukubona nokugwema izikhohlisi esikhathini esizayo.

Izikhombo zebhayibheli mayelana “nokukhwabanisa kwemizwa”

1. UHeider, F. (1958). I-psychology yobudlelwano phakathi kwabantu. I-Paris: I-PUF.
2. Paulhus, D.L., & Williams, K.M. (2002). Abantu abamnyama: i-narcissism, i-Machiavellianism kanye ne-psychopathy. Ukubuyekezwa KwePsychology Yezenhlalakahle, 34(2), 104-116.
3. U-Erikson, E. (1963). Ubunikazi kanye nomjikelezo wempilo. I-Paris: I-Flammarion.
4. Baumeister, R. F., & Leary, M. R. (1995). Isidingo Sokuba Sesakhe: Isidingo Somuntu Esiyisisekelo Esinemithelela Yokuxhaphaza Imizwelo. Ijenali yeSayensi Yengqondo, 98(2), 160-173.
5. Ekman, P. (1985). Ukukhohlisa, amanga nokulawula imizwa. EParis: Odile Jacob.
6. U-Karpman, S. (1968). Unxantathu wedrama wobudlelwane babantu. Ukuhlaziywa Kokwenziwe, 7(1), 39-45.
7. Zimbardo, P. (2007). I-Lucifer Effect: Indlela Abantu Abalungile Abangenziwa Ngayo Ukwenza Okubi. EParis: La Découverte.

Isiphetho: Sibheke empilweni ekhululekile negculisekile

Ukuzikhulula ethonyeni le-narcissistic pervert kuwuhambo olunzima, kodwa kuvula indlela eya ekuphileni okugcwaliseke kakhulu futhi okuyiqiniso. Khumbula ukuthi unamandla ngaphakathi kuwe okunqoba lesi sihluku futhi ufanelwe ubudlelwano obunempilo nobuhloniphekile.

Hlala ukhumbula ukuthi imizwa yakho ilungile futhi unelungelo lokuyiveza. Ngokuqaphela izindlela zokuxhaphaza imizwa nokusebenza ngokwakho, awukwazi ukuzikhulula kuphela, kodwa futhi ube namandla futhi uqine.

Indlela yakho eya ekuphulukisweni nasekugcwalisekeni iqala manje. Zithembe futhi uthathe izinyathelo eziya empilweni efanele.