Ukuziphatha kwe-manipulator ngemva kokuphuka : lo muntu onobuthi usabela kanjani uma ubashiya? Ingabe izinto ziba nzima? Ukusabela kungaba okuhlukahlukene! Ukukunikeza umbono, nansi ukusabela okungaba okungu-9 komkhohlisi lapho umshiya.
Ukuziphatha kwe-manipulator ngemva kokuphuka - ukusabela okungu-9
Nazi ezinye izibonelo:
1. Usiqapha kakhulu isisulu sakhe
Enye yezinto ezingama-20 a i-narcissistic manipulator ehlanekezelwe inzondo ukuyishiya ungayinaki. Into yokuqala azoyenza ngemva kokuhlukana ihlale ikubhekile. Njengoba nje isilwane esizingelayo sicupha isisulu saso, sizokucupha futhi siqaphe ukuthi uhlobanisa nobani.
2. Uzizwa ephoxekile
Lokhu kusabela ngokuyinhloko kubonisa iqiniso lokuthi akasakwazi ukukulawula, hhayi ngoba eshonelwe othandekayo. Ukudumala kuvela nawukuthi uzobe engaphumelelanga ukufeza umgomo wakhe, wokukwenza uthembele kuye ngokuphelele. Lesi sigaba sokuthula se-PN ngemuva kokuhlukana siphawulwa intukuthelo enkulu kuye kanye nakuwe.
3. Akanazwelo
La ukusabela kwe-manipulator lapho umshiya uyinoma yini ngaphandle kwesithandwa noma umuntu othanda abanye. Ayikho indlela angaqonda ngayo ubuhlungu noma ukuhlupheka kwakho, ingasaphathwa eyokuzwelana naye. Yingakho enye yezindlela zokuziphatha zomkhohlisi ngemuva kokuhlukana ukuthi uzozama ukwenza ukholelwe ukuthi uyathinteka ngokuhamba kwakho. Eqinisweni, i-PN manipulator ibonakala ikhanga kakhulu futhi ikhathalela ekuqaleni kobudlelwane ngomzamo wokukubusa.
4. Uyingcweti ku-Double Game
Ngenkathi ucabanga ukuthi i-PN iyahlupheka, umkhohlisi ucabanga ukukunxenxela futhi. Uyi-ace emdlalweni ophindwe kabili, indoda enobuso obubili eyenza kahle kule ndawo. Eqinisweni, i-PN ayinandaba nabanye, kunalokho, iyabasebenzisa. Ngakho-ke kungenzeka ukuthi uzokwenza ukholelwe ukuthi isifiso sakhe esikhulu siwukukwenza ujabule.
5. Uzobhekana nawe ngezindinganiso zakho
Njengoba engumkhohlisi omkhulu, umgomo wakhe uwukwenza ukholelwe ukuthi awusizi futhi uguqule izindinganiso zakho. Kuzodala umuzwa wokuzizwa ungelutho ozoholela ekulahlekelweni ukuzethemba. Ukubhekana nezindinganiso zakho kumnika ithuba lokuphula ukuziqhenya kwakho.
6. Ubeka icala kuwe
Ukufuna ukuguqula isimo sibe yinzuzo yomuntu kuwukusabela okuvamile phakathi kwama-FN. Ekugcineni, uzozama ukukwenza uzizwe unecala, akubeke icala, acwebe isithombe sakhe futhi aziveze njengesisulu. Ngaphezu kwakho konke, ungaphenduli kule mania, ngoba umphumela wokuthula ku-manipulator awunakuvinjelwa.
7. Ufuna ukwesabisa isisulu
Ukwesaba umuzwa onikeza amandla amaningi kuma-manipulators futhi bayakwazi. Yingakho, uma behluleka ukufeza umgomo wabo, bazozama ukukwethusa. Indlela yokuthi bakukhombise ukuthi yibona kuphela abangakuvikela. Qaphela futhi ngaphezu kwakho konke sebenzisa isibindi ukubhekana nazo.
8. Uzosebenzisa udlame olungokwengqondo
Ngemuva kokwesaba, uzobhekana nezinsongo futhi uma ithuba livela, angakwenza ngisho nokuwela ekucindezelekeni. Impela, udlame olungokwengqondo luveza okunye ukuhlukunyezwa oyobhekana nakho ebuhlotsheni bothando nomuntu one-narcissistic. Yingakho kufanele uhlale unokwesekwa ngokwengqondo nangokomzwelo eceleni kwakho ngemva kokuhlukana ne-PN.
9. Ukuziphatha Komkhohlisi Ngemva Kokuhlukana: Ufuna ukuxoxisana
Umkhohlisi we-narcissistic uhlala ebuyela empilweni yesisulu sakhe ngemuva kokuhlukana ukuze azame ukumkholisa ukuthi ashiye isinqumo sakhe. Uzozama ukuthola ukuvumelana ukuze kube nokubuyisana okungenzeka. Akwenzeki ukwazi kahle ukuthi kuthatha isikhathi esingakanani ukuthi i-PN ibuye, kodwa izohlala iziveza ekugcineni.
Yiziphi izindlela zokukhohlisa?
Ukuze kutholwe amandla ayo okukhohlisa, i-PN yenza ngobuqili ukuze ivale amehlo esisulu sayo:
- Ukuqagela kwengqondo: nangu umqili uzokwenza ufane nembuzi asole ukuthi wenza izinto azenzayo yena. Njengomqambimanga ozokubiza ngokuthi ungumqambimanga, noma umuntu onomona oyokusola ngokuthi unomona kakhulu futhi unempahla.
- I-deformation: ebizwa nangokuthi isu le-straw man, umkhohlisi uthola injabulo enkulu noma ukuhlanekezela amagama akho noma ukuwenza abe mabi kakhulu. Uyawaguqula nganoma iyiphi indlela evumelana naye futhi asebenzise izimpikiswano zakho ngokumelene nawe kuze kube sezingeni lokuzizwa unecala.
- Ukungathembeki ngokomzwelo: le nqubo yaziwa yi-PN futhi iyayisebenzisa uma kuziwa ekugcineni inyamazane yayo ingaphansi kwethonya layo. Uma eqaphela ukuthi uthembele kuye, ngeke uqaphele lapho umkhohlisi ekushiya futhi ebuya, ngoba lokhu kuyingxenye yesu lakhe lokukhohlisa ngokomzwelo.
- I-Bluff noma amanga: efihla iqiniso, ekufihlela imicabango yakhe ngamabomu, umkhohlisi uzokwenza ubone uhlangothi lwakhe olunephutha ngokuphelele. Uyi-double game ace.
- Ukuhlukunyezwa noma ukukhanya kwegesi : umkhohlisi uzenza ungabaze uze ubukeke njengesiwula. Uzosebenzisa amagama anjengokuthi " Akunjalo! Umcabango wakho! Uyahlanya! » Sivame ukukhuluma ngokudunwa kwengqondo.
Ingabe ama-manipulators angashintsha?
I-narcissistic manipulator ngumuntu ongalokothi azibuze. Ngakho-ke, ukuzishintsha kuba umsebenzi cishe ongenakwenzeka, ngisho noma izici ezithile zomlingiswa zingathuthuka. Ukuze wenze lokhu, udinga ukwazi kahle ukuthi liyini iphuzu elibuthakathaka le-manipulator?
Ngempela, ukuze i-PN ishintshe, kufanele idlule esimweni esinzima lapho izobona khona ukuthi isishayeke phansi yaze yawa. Lokhu kufanele kumenze akuqaphele ukuziphatha kwakhe futhi afune ukushintsha ngokuphelele ukuze abe umuntu omusha. Lokhu kuhlala kunzima ukunquma nokufeza, ngoba ngumuntu ojabulela ukubona abanye behlupheka.
Ireferensi ye-bibliographic ekuziphatheni kobuqili
Nazi izikhombo eziyisikhombisa zebhayibheli endikimbeni yokuziphatha kobuqili:
- Sénécal, J. (2013). Ukukhohlisa: Ukuqonda kanye nokubona ukuziphatha okukhohlisayo. Editions de l'Homme.
- Vermot, J. (2015). Ukuxhaphaza imizwa. I-Press Universitaires de France.
- Lalande, J. (2016). Umhlahlandlela Wokukhohlisa: Ungayithola Kanjani Futhi Uvikelwe Ngama-Manipulators. Izinhlobo ze-Eyrolles.
- Bourcier, S. (2014). IPsychology of manipulation: Ukuqonda ukwenza. Editions L'Harmattan.
- Bouchard, G. (2018). Ukukhohlisa komphakathi: Phakathi kwethonya nokuhlukunyezwa. Izinguqulo zikaDe Boeck.
- Cohen, M. (2017). Ama-Manipulators: Ungawabona kanjani futhi uzikhulule kuwo. Larousse Editions.
- U-Rico, C. (2019). I-Psychology of manipulation: Ukuhlaziywa kanye nemibono. Dunod Editions.
Lezi zithenjwa zinikeza imibono eyahlukene ngesihloko futhi zingakusiza uqonde kangcono ukuziphatha okukhohlisayo kanye nemiphumela yako.
Ukuziphatha kwe-manipulator ngemva kokuphuka - Isiphetho
Ngamafuphi, lolu lwazi luzokuvumela ukuthi ube nesiqalo sokuziphatha kwe-manipulator ngemva kokuphuka. Ngisho noma ngezinye izikhathi kusiza ukwazi ukuthi i-manipulator ikushiya kanjani, kodwa uma isinyathelo sivela kuwe, yazi ukuthi umhlukumezi wakho ngeke akuyeke isinyathelo esisodwa.
Nginentshisekelo nge-psychology, ngasebenza emkhakheni wezezimali iminyaka eyi-10. Njengomphathi omkhulu ngaphatha amaqembu abantu abangaphezu kuka-200. I-psychology yawo wonke umuntu iyindawo yonke ngokwayo futhi ngokuqinisekile iyisihluthulelo sempumelelo yalawa mabhizinisi!
Ngesayithi perversnarcissique.org kanye nenhlangano esiza abantulayo i-Je M'Aime, ngabelana ngolwazi lwami ngale ndaba kanye nolwazi lwami lwempilo mayelana ne-narcissism kanye nokuhlanekezelwa kwe-narcissistic, usizi emphakathini wethu. Kimina lesi sifo siyinkinga yangempela yezempilo yomphakathi, eyaziwa kancane, nakuba sithinta cishe ingxenye yabantu ngamazinga ahlukahlukene.
Futhi kuyindlela yokusiza abantu, njengoba nami ngiye ngakwazi ukuthola usizo kubantu engingabazi kukho konke ukuphila kwami. Akukhona kuphela abahlanekezeli be-narcissistic kulo mhlaba futhi ngenhlanhla! Lapha sisiza abantu baqonde ukuthi kwenzekani kubo futhi badlulele empilweni engenazo ama-narcissists - impilo yakho engcono kakhulu! Awuwedwa futhi ungenza ushintsho ukuze uphile impilo eyanelisayo, egcwele ukuthula, ukuzwana nothando!
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