Umntu ogqwethekileyo we-narcissistic uhlala ephuhlisa ulawulo lwakhe kunye nolawulo phakathi kwesibini. Isebenza njani igqwethi ye-narcissistic kuwe? ukwenza umntu azive enetyala ? Indlela yokuphuma kule meko yokulawula? Ngaba kunokwenzeka ukubetha i-narcissistic manipulator kumdlalo wakhe? Le migca ilandelayo iphendula imibuzo yakho.
Indlela yokwenza umntu azive enetyala?
Ukuze ufumanise ngcono umntu ogqwethekileyo we-narcissistic, kuyafuneka ukwazi ukuba wenza njani kumaxhoba akhe. Apha ngezantsi kukho iingcebiso zokwenza umntu azive enetyala:.
1. Mbuze imibuzo endaweni yokumtyhola: Oku kumvumela ukuba zivume iimpazamo zomntu ngokungathanga ngqo. Ngokuxhomekeke kwiimpendulo zakhe, unokumbamba kubuxoki awabuthethayo. Ukuba uyamtyhola, usenokuzithethelela.
2. Zidlale njengexhoba ukumenza azive enetyala: Ukwenza umntu azive enetyala, yenza kube ngathi ulindele ukuziphatha kwakhe. Thetha naye ngezinye izinto azenzileyo ezikucaphukisayo. Eli liqhinga elisebenzayo lokufumana uxolo kuye.
3. Dlala ngeemvakalelo: Kubudlelwane besibini, dlala kwichord enovakalelo yeemvakalelo isoloko ingumbono osebenzayo. Mxelele ukuba unemibuzo ngendlela avakalelwa ngayo ngawe. Nangona kunjalo, qiniseka ukuba uvakalelwa kukuba kufuneka abonise ukuba ukukhathalele.
4. Thetha ngento omenzele yona: sukuthalalisa ukuthelekisa izenzo zakhe nezakho ukugxininisa kwizinto ezilungileyo ukuba wenze kuye. Eyona nto ibalulekileyo kukubonisa ukuba ungumntu olungileyo kwaye uzimisele kubudlelwane bakho.
5. Kuphephe ukuzibeka ityala: Xa uzama ukwenza umntu azive enetyala, usenokuzilwela. Lumka ke ngoko ungaziboni iimpazamo zakho kwaye uhlala ebuyela kwizenzo zakhe ezigwenxa.
6. Yongeza idrama: Ukuba umntu uyabuchasa ubuchule bakho bokutyhola, kutheni ungenzi phakamisa iimvakalelo ? Phakathi kweenyembezi, iinyembezi, ukukhala ... injongo ukondla iimvakalelo zakhe zokuba netyala.
7. Zigqale: Ukuze ufumane into oyifunayo, gxininisa impumelelo kunye nezenzo zakho ezilungileyo. Okukhona uzibeka phambili, kokukhona kuya kuba lula ukufumana iimpendulo ezakhayo.
8. Gxininisa kwiimvakalelo ezingakhiyo: Iimvakalelo ezimbi izixhobo ezisebenzayo zokufumana into oyifunayo. Phakathi kosizi, ihlazo, umsindo, uloyiko, njalo njalo, uya kuba nokhetho oluninzi. Xa ucela into kuye, bangela imvakalelo embi. Oku kuya kukhokelela ekubeni uyithathele indawo ngeemvakalelo ezonwabileyo ngakumbi kwaye uya kuphumelela ekufumaneni le nto uyifunayo.
9. Sebenzisa ulonwabo: Emva kokusebenzisa iimvakalelo ezingakhiyo, kutheni ungagxininisi koko imvakalelo yolonwabo nothando ? Menze akholelwe ukuba yintoni na ubuza kukwenza uzive ngcono.
10. Buza ngokwahlukileyo: Ukuba umntu akanikezeli kwiinzame zakho zokumenza azive enetyala, sebenzisa ezinye iindlela zokubuza. Qiniseka, nangona kunjalo, ukuthatha ikhefu phakathi kwemizamo yakho kwaye uzame kwakhona kamva.
Kubudlelwane nomntu ogqwethekileyo we-narcissistic, i yokusingatha ihlala ikhona. Umgqwethi we-narcissistic uyisebenzisela ukugcina umfanekiso wakhe kunye nokuzithemba. Ujikela konke ukungafezeki kunye neempazamo zakhe kwiqabane lakhe. Emva koko ixhoba liziva linetyala kwaye umkhohlisi uziva eqinile.
Indlela yokubalekela ityala elenziwe ngumntu ogqwethekileyo we-narcissistic?
La yecala yenye yezona ndlela zinamandla ezisetyenziswa yi-manipulator. Ukuzikhulula kuyo, kusoloko kucetyiswa ukuba wenze unyango. Ukuxoxa ngayo kuvumela ixhoba le-narcissistic pervert ukuba licacise izinto. Ikwanceda ukuphucula indlela yokuziphatha kunye nobudlelwane nabanye.
Ukwenza umsebenzi ngokwakho kukuvumela ukuba uphume kwesi sangqa sibi esikhokelela ekuthotyweni nasekuzincameni. Ukuba ixhoba ligcina ityala lalo kulo, lizibeka esichengeni sokuzitshabalalisa. Ngaphezu koko, usenokuzifumanisa engakwazi ukuzithanda yaye usenokuba nezinto ezijongelwa phantsi kunye notyekelo lokusoloko ezijongela phantsi aze azive enetyala.
Indlela yokwenza umntu ogqwethekileyo azive enetyala?
Ukuba ukwi ubudlelwane obunetyhefu, kuyahenda ukwenza umhlaseli onama-narcissistic abethe kumdlalo wakhe. Nangona kunjalo, kukho iindlela ezigqwethekileyo onokuzisebenzisa ngokuchasene nabo. Injongo kukubenza bangazinzi kwaye babenze bathandabuze ngokwabo. Ngeendlela ezingezantsi, kuya kuba lula kuwe ukuba ulahle iimvakalelo zakho zecala kwaye, ngexesha elifanayo, i-narcissistic pervert.
- Misela imida: Ukumosha umntu ogqwethekileyo we-narcissistic, akukho nto injengokuqina kuye. Cinga ngokumisela imida ukuba kufuneka uchaze ngokucacileyo. Kwakhona chaza ukuba ukugqitha le mida kuya kuba nemiphumo.
- Thula: Ujongene neenzame zokukhohlisa kunye nokugxeka, qiniseka ukuba Gcina uthule. Oku, ngokuqinisekileyo, kuya kumdodobalisa kwaye kumenze athandabuze ulawulo lwakhe kuwe.
- Kuphephe ukubonisa iimvakalelo zakho: Ukukulawula, umntu ogqwethekileyo we-narcissistic usebenzisa ezakho iimvakalelo ngokuchasene nawe. Emva koko usebenzisa ukulawulwa kwengqondo kwixhoba lakhe ukuze alilawule ngcono. Ukunqanda le meko, ulumkele ungazityhili, ingakumbi ukuba ungumntu obuthathaka. Ngokufihla iimvakalelo zakho kunye nokuba semngciphekweni kwakho, awuniki umxhasi ithuba lokufikelela kuwe.
- Sebenzisa iindawo zayo ezibuthathaka: Umntu ogqwethekileyo we-narcissistic, ngokubanzi, ngumntu oxhomekeke ngokweemvakalelo onemiba yokuzithemba. Ufuna ukuhoywa nokunconywa. Ukuyiphazamisa, unako sebenzisa iindawo zakhe ezibuthathaka kuye. Ngokomzekelo, musa ukumnika ingqalelo ayifunayo. Ukuze pique i-ego yakhe, unako ukunika izincomo kwabanye abantu okufutshane ngaphandle kokuba ubahlawule.
Iimbekiselo zeBibliographic ukwenza umntu ogqwethekileyo azive enetyala
- Hirigoyen, M.-F (1998). Ukuxhatshazwa ngokokuziphatha: Ugonyamelo olugqwethekileyo mihla le. EParis: Ukufunyanwa.
- Tisseron, S. (2013). Ukonakala kweemfihlo zosapho. EParis: Iinguqulelo Armand Colin.
- UMelman, C. (2002). Indoda engenamxhuzulane: Yonwabela ngazo zonke iindleko. EParis: Denoël.
- Hirigoyen, M.-F (2012). Ubuwedwa obutsha. EParis: Ukufunyanwa.
- Lejoyeux, M. (2005). Ubunzima bobuntu: Ukubaqonda ukuba baphile ngcono kunye nabo. EParis: Odile Jacob.
- USalome, J. (2004). Amagama ziifestile (okanye ziindonga): Intshayelelo kunxibelelwano olungenabundlobongela. EParis: Iinguqulelo La Découverte.
- Debray-Ritzen, P. (1993). I-Psychopathology yokuhlukunyezwa ngokokuziphatha. EParis: PUF.
isiphelo
Ukuphuma ekubanjweni kwe-narcissistic pervert kufuna ngaphezu kwayo yonke into ukuba uphinde ulawule iimvakalelo zakho kunye nokuzibona kwakho. Ubutyala sisixhobo esinamandla esisetyenziswa ngabakhohlisayo, kodwa sinokuchaswa ngokuqina kunye nokomelela. Ngokubeka imida ecacileyo, ukwala ukunikezela ekulawuleni iimvakalelo kunye nokusebenza ngokuzithemba kwakho, kunokwenzeka ukuba uzikhulule kule mpembelelo eyonakalisayo. Ukuba ukulawulwa ngamandla abo, ulwazi kunye nokuzeyisa zizitshixo zokufumana amandla kwakhona kunye nokuphumelela kwakhona. Kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuba indlela yokwenyani yokuphilisa kukuzihlonipha kwaye, kwezinye iimeko, uncedo lwengcali.
Ndinomdla ngengqondo, ndasebenza kwicandelo lezemali iminyaka eyi-10. Njenge-CEO ndilawule amaqela abantu abangaphezu kwama-200. Ingqondo yomntu wonke yindalo ngokwayo kwaye ngokuqinisekileyo isitshixo kwimpumelelo yala mashishini!
Ngesiza se-perversnarcissique.org kunye nesisa u-Je M'Aime, ndabelana ngolwazi lwam ngalo mbandela kunye namava am obomi kumxholo we-narcissism kunye ne-narcissistic perversion, isibetho kuluntu lwethu. Kum esi sifo yingxaki yokwenyani yempilo yoluntu, eyaziwa kancinci, nangona sichaphazela phantse isiqingatha sabemi ngokwemigangatho eyahlukeneyo.
Ikwayindlela yokunceda abantu, njengoko ndiye ndakwazi ukufumana uncedo kubantu endingabaziyo ubomi bam bonke. Akukho zigqwetheki narcissistic kuphela kweli hlabathi kwaye ngethamsanqa! Apha sinceda abantu baqonde okwenzekayo kubo kwaye badlulele kubomi obungenazo ii-narcissists - ubomi bakho obungcono! Awuwedwa kwaye unokwenza utshintsho ukuze uphile ubomi obanelisayo, obugcwele uxolo, imvisiswano kunye nothando!
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