Un emotional manipulator adopts this method of manipulation to be able to control someone. Narcissistic perverts are the most faithful to this style of manipulation whether in a relationship or at work. What are the manipulation techniques? What is the profile of their ideal victim? How to get out of its grip? You will get the answers to these questions in this article.
10 Techniques of Emotional Manipulators You Should Know
It is essential to know the techniques of the emotional manipulator. Here are some examples:
1. They don't want to do anything
Le manipulator emotional refuses to do what his victim asks him to do. Sometimes he doesn't refuse outright but he makes it clear that he's not going to. But, the majority of the time, he refuses immediately when the victim asks him to do something. In fact, the manipulator does not want to do anything because he remains very pessimistic in all situations.
2. Only humiliate others
Most of the time, emotional manipulation always turns into humiliation. He will make his ego understand that he knows how to do everything. Therefore, the victim will turn to him to better understand the subject. Indeed, the manipulator always tries to show that he is superior to everyone.
3. Manipulators distort reality
The victim of the narcissistic manipulator finds himself in doubt and uncertainty. This is the result of what his partner tells him. The latter tends to always transform reality for the sole purpose of creating doubt in his victim. Therefore, the victim no longer knows what the truth is. To get out of this phase, it is very necessary to seek the help of a professional like a psychologist. He will know very well how to accompany you.
4. They always put pressure on others
It is certain that the emotional manipulator always targets the most vulnerable people. Thus, it doesn't take much to convince his victim to make a decision. So that the victim does not have time to think about his answer, he will begin to pressure him. In this case, the victim will only follow the advice of the manipulator so as not to take too much time. This is the goal of the manipulator.
5. The manipulator approaches very quickly
In order for his victim to open up directly to him, the narcissistic pervert immediately shows himself as a person of trust, who listens and who is not going to judge her. But, it is only a technique that he adopts to know the weaknesses of the person in front of him. Therefore, it is really advisable not to trust very quickly so as not to fall into the trap of an emotional manipulator.
6. They always take the victim's place
When the victim begins to understand his little game, the narcissistic manipulator tries to make him feel guilty. Therefore, he will do everything to convince her that he is the victim in the story. In this situation, the victim does not have to justify himself to him but only ask for the help of an expert to help him get out of it.
7. Often seek to make people feel pain
To control the victim, the manipulator will inflict some guilt on her. Sometimes, he is very aggressive and very violent towards his victim who could get into an argument when she talks about a problem within the couple. Confronting this, it is very likely that the victim feels pain.
8. They only say mean things
To sow even more doubt in his victim, the manipulator spends his time saying mean things about him in private and in public. This manipulation technique is widely used because it hides the problem of lack of self-confidence of manipulators. To get out of it, the victim must make it clear that he deserves respect.
9. They remain unmoved instead of expressing themselves.
There might be a time when the manipulator stays very quiet and completely ignores their victim. In fact, it's a method he uses to punish her. This technique avoids the problem towards the two people concerned but does not make it disappear. This is why it is recommended to always discuss what is wrong with your relationship.
10. Emotional manipulators take advantage of other people's weaknesses.
The more time you spend with an emotionally manipulative person, the more they will take advantage of your weaknesses. The manipulation goes much better when the person knows the weak points of his victim. To stop being subjected to this technique, the victim must put a limit between themselves and their emotional manipulative partner.
How do I know if I am the victim of a manipulator?
The victims of narcissistic pervert and the emotional manipulator face great suffering. Most victims show the following signs:
- In the presence of the narcissistic person, the victim does not feel safe at all.
- The victim of the manipulator is always anxious and distressed.
- Doesn't trust her at all.
- She immediately isolates herself from the world from the start of her relationship with the manipulator.
- The victim has insomnia and eating problems.
- Stressed all the time.
- Immediate change in behavior.
Why does emotional manipulation happen?
Anyone can become a victim of an emotional manipulator. On the other hand, he prefers better to conquer vulnerable people, who are very emotional and are looking for a person who can give them love.
If you have the following personalities, you need to be careful because you are an ideal target for narcissistic manipulators:
- You are ready to give up everything for the happiness of your partner.
- You always need your partner's consent before you do anything.
- You always accept to be wrong when you are in conflict even if it is not the case.
- You can't refuse what others ask of you.
- You are in lack of self-confidence.
Emotional Manipulator – How to Get Out of His Grip?
To get out of the grip of an emotional manipulator, the first thing needed is for the victim to be aware of her situation. Then, the victim should not think that his partner to change after his request. Since a manipulator cannot change after a simple request from him.
The victim must remain on his guard because after this situation, the manipulator will pretend to be the victim. At this point, the best thing for the victim to do is to set a limit by starting to deny their partner's requests. Indeed, the victim must learn to say “NO” without feeling guilty.
Bibliographic references to recognize the emotional manipulator
Here are seven bibliographic references on the subject of emotional manipulators:
- Heider, F. (1958). The psychology of interpersonal relationships. Paris: PUF.
- Paulhus, D.L., & Williams, K.M. (2002). Dark personalities: narcissism, Machiavellianism and psychopathy. Social Psychology Review, 34 (2), 104-116.
- Baumeister, R. F., & Leary, M. R. (1995). The Need to Belong: A Basic Human Need with Implications for Emotional Manipulation. Journal of Psychological Science, 98 (2), 160-173.
- Ekman, P. (1985). Deception, lying and emotional control. Paris: Odile Jacob.
- Karpman, S. (1968). The dramatic triangle of human relationships. Transactional Analysis, 7 (1), 39-45.
- Zimbardo, P. (2007). The Lucifer Effect: How Good People Can Be Made to Do Evil. Paris: The Discovery.
- Dumouchel, P. (1995). Emotions: Essay on the body and the social. Paris: The Preventers of Thinking in Circles.
These books and articles provide an in-depth perspective on the mechanisms of emotional manipulation and associated personality traits.
Conclusion
In conclusion, understanding the mechanisms of emotional manipulation allows us to better identify and counter the techniques used by manipulators. Recognizing these behaviors, becoming aware of our own vulnerabilities and getting support from professionals are key steps to escape their influence and regain a balanced life. Information and education remain the best weapons to protect ourselves and help victims regain control of their lives.
To consult: Can manipulator change for love
Passionate about psychology, I worked in the finance field for 10 years. As CEO I managed teams of more than 200 people. Everyone's psychology is a universe in its own right and certainly the key to the success of these businesses!
With the site perversnarcissique.org and the charity Je M'Aime, I share my knowledge on the subject and my life experience on the subject of narcissism and narcissistic perversion, the scourge of our society. For me this disease is a real public health problem, little known, even though it affects almost half of the population to varying degrees.
It's also a way of helping people, as I have been able to get help from strangers myself throughout my life. There are not only narcissistic perverts in this world and fortunately! Here we help people understand what's happening to them and move on to a life free of narcissists - your best life! You are not alone and you can make the change to live a fulfilling life, full of peace, harmony and love!
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